Philhippy Posted February 23, 2017 Share Posted February 23, 2017 So today a friend of mine was checking his match account and he stumbled across my current gf apparently she had a profile. So I asked her as nice as possible and she said it was her profile that she made a year ago. Iv been dating her since Jan 8 2017. My question is where her pictures was it says recently active and I asked he that and she really didn't answer other than it was an old profile and that she hasn't used it In awhile. She said she loves me and doesn't want to hurt me so don't worry about it But I have trust issues and to trying to hide them and when I seen that it was like a gut punch. So what does recently active mean when was the last time she was on. It didn't say 24 hrs or 3 days of anything like that just recently active. Please help I. Hurting on the inside thinking shes going to cheat she did once in the beginning. So idk what to do Link to post Share on other sites
Author Philhippy Posted February 23, 2017 Author Share Posted February 23, 2017 Bump someone please explain to me what recently active means on match.com Link to post Share on other sites
chphan Posted February 23, 2017 Share Posted February 23, 2017 It's more than 24 hours has past since they been online but less than 3 days have past. So somewhere between like 1 or 2 days. There's really nothing you can do. You just going to have to trust her. The thing about online is that once you create a profile, it becomes like addiction and not many people what to delete it even when they find someone. This is why so many keep coming back and you see the same faces on their for years. They are always keeping their option open or looking for something better or seeing what's out there. Link to post Share on other sites
dumbass2 Posted February 23, 2017 Share Posted February 23, 2017 You started dating a month ago and she's already cheated? You guys had the talk and were exclusive when she did that? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
AmIRight Posted February 23, 2017 Share Posted February 23, 2017 So today a friend of mine was checking his match account and he stumbled across my current gf apparently she had a profile. So I asked her as nice as possible and she said it was her profile that she made a year ago. Iv been dating her since Jan 8 2017. My question is where her pictures was it says recently active and I asked he that and she really didn't answer other than it was an old profile and that she hasn't used it In awhile. She said she loves me and doesn't want to hurt me so don't worry about it But I have trust issues and to trying to hide them and when I seen that it was like a gut punch. So what does recently active mean when was the last time she was on. It didn't say 24 hrs or 3 days of anything like that just recently active. Please help I. Hurting on the inside thinking shes going to cheat she did once in the beginning. So idk what to do Speaking from experience, every time a girl said "don't want to hurt you" that meant something was happening behind the scenes. Link to post Share on other sites
phineas Posted February 23, 2017 Share Posted February 23, 2017 The only thing she could of said to keep me from walking was "I totally forgot about it and i'll delete it immediately. I love you and don't want to lose you" anything else and i'd demote to FWB and start looking for a new GF. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted February 23, 2017 Share Posted February 23, 2017 She loves you after 1.5 months of dating? 7 Link to post Share on other sites
chix Posted February 23, 2017 Share Posted February 23, 2017 May I ask how old is everyone involved? May I also ask if you believe love is possible in a relationship of this amount of time? 3 Link to post Share on other sites
angel.eyes Posted February 23, 2017 Share Posted February 23, 2017 If the app is on your phone, the site can register you as active even though you never check it. It's a glitch in the system, and the company has no incentive to fix it because they want as many people as possible to appear active. You've been dating a month? Are you exclusive? When did you have the talk to reach that agreement? By the way, I'm not downplaying your concerns. It is a red flag that she appears active. But you need more information before you jump to a conclusion. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
newheart Posted February 23, 2017 Share Posted February 23, 2017 I can tell you from experience that just opening an email generated from Match will be considered as activity, not necessarily being on the site, communicating, searching, etc. That said, even if that were the case here, she obviously would be aware that she has an open Match account because she is receiving the emails. I also have to say I agree with Phineas. The "love" thing already too though ... you've pretty much just started dating? Link to post Share on other sites
coolheadal Posted February 23, 2017 Share Posted February 23, 2017 So today a friend of mine was checking his match account and he stumbled across my current gf apparently she had a profile. So I asked her as nice as possible and she said it was her profile that she made a year ago. Iv been dating her since Jan 8 2017. My question is where her pictures was it says recently active and I asked he that and she really didn't answer other than it was an old profile and that she hasn't used it In awhile. She said she loves me and doesn't want to hurt me so don't worry about it But I have trust issues and to trying to hide them and when I seen that it was like a gut punch. So what does recently active mean when was the last time she was on. It didn't say 24 hrs or 3 days of anything like that just recently active. Please help I. Hurting on the inside thinking shes going to cheat she did once in the beginning. So idk what to do You find out early so you know she's playing you and also cheating with other men. You can't stop her only she can stop doing it. I would have other options here. You focus on her too much back away and start looking for other women. I know you want this one but she's not 100% into you only she want other men. Again any women can say they love you, really I love you stand means more than just love you, but she also said she didn't want to hurt you but she's very clever to have you and to fool around looking for more fun with other men. That's what she's doing. So you need to tighten up your gut and go and do the same thing as you don't need to waste time with such a woman you really don't have all of her attention. She wants more than what you can give her. Do not show weakness around her. You did something wrong gain self-respect, try not to show her your true feelings. But you already did that doesn't work in your favor. I believe her actions speak for herself. You need to either talk to her again or let be and you start looking into other woman. You don't have to tolerate her behavior, but you are!! MAN-UP! Link to post Share on other sites
Poutrew Posted February 23, 2017 Share Posted February 23, 2017 Well, you can explain to her how badly she has hurt you with her response. By saying 'I don't want to hurt you' that means that she is doing something on Match that she knows you won't like - now what can that be? Tell her that if you were having sex with a girl on the side, the 'I don't want to hurt you' line is exactly what you would say to her, as far as a confession. So ask her if it's really nothing, would she mind if you look through her undeleted texts? If she gets defensive, then just back off on the relationship. You can't stop her from eating the ego kibbles other guys are giving her. But really, why go to all the trouble? She has already basically confessed to having an active account on a dating site... she has probably already deleted any incriminating texts, so I would just drop her. What she wants in a relationship and what you want are not the same thing... wish her well as you hold the door open and pat her ass as she walks out. Link to post Share on other sites
Popsicle Posted February 23, 2017 Share Posted February 23, 2017 Tell her to hide her profile. Hiding it will make her disappear from searches. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted February 23, 2017 Share Posted February 23, 2017 If the app is on your phone, the site can register you as active even though you never check it. It's a glitch in the system, and the company has no incentive to fix it because they want as many people as possible to appear active. I can see why they would want everyone to appear " recently active". Wall to wall - "Last visited 2 yrs ago" would certainly not be good for business. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
dumbass2 Posted February 23, 2017 Share Posted February 23, 2017 I can see why they would want everyone to appear " recently active". Wall to wall - "Last visited 2 yrs ago" would certainly not be good for business. Yeah, if they automatically removed profiles not active over 3 weeks from searches, half of the sites profiles would be gone. OP if you access the site from a computer instead of a mobile app, it will tell you someone has been active from within an hour to over 3 weeks. I think It says active within an hour, 24 hours, 3 days, 5 days, a week, 2 weeks and 3 weeks. Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted February 23, 2017 Share Posted February 23, 2017 Hurting on the inside thinking shes going to cheat she did once in the beginning. So idk what to do Why did you remain with her after she cheated on you? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
TunaInTheBrine Posted February 23, 2017 Share Posted February 23, 2017 I'm very familiar with Match. Recently Active means quite literally 'recently'. It has probably been more than 3 days but fewer than one week, because then it starts to say "Active over a week ago." It is entirely possible that she is not cheating on you or really looking for someone else. How else have things been going? What does your gut tell you about the relationship so far? The right thing to do seems for her to offer to delete the profile immediately. If I were her, that's what I would do. But I would caution about you deciding that for her. The ideal scenario is she initiates the move to reassure you. Link to post Share on other sites
TunaInTheBrine Posted February 23, 2017 Share Posted February 23, 2017 OP, nevermind. I just saw that you wrote she cheated once already on you in the beginning of the relationship. If that's the case, I would have ended things right then and there, walked away and never looked back. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
fireflywy Posted February 24, 2017 Share Posted February 24, 2017 Dude... I was there once. Dated a woman like that for a year and a half. If it isn't gone in a week, then drop her like a hot potato because all you will ultimately be is a place holder to keep her occupied until she moves on somewhere else when you've had enough of her b.s. One week and then you NEXT HER. No demands, no pleading, don't even bring up the profile. You go in quiet and as manly resolute as Gregory Peck and say "Well, it has been fun but I think it's time to see other people. Goodbye." And then don't look back. Link to post Share on other sites
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