She lost interest.. in looking for ..

[Davidcee]

I met this girl the beginning of my fall semester it wasn't till the middle of the semester that I got her number and it wasn't till the last week of the semester that I asked her out on a date. Our first date was probably one of the best dates I've ever been on and same for her bc soon after the date she told me how much fun she had and was looking forward to our next date. I'm usually not the type of girl to have sex on the first date or even kiss idk that's just how I am but I rather do it during the right time and place. We had a few weeks before our winter semester started and we both had anatomy but different classes and I knew we were going to be stressed the hell out for the whole 6 weeks so on Jan 1st I wanted to do something amazing so I asked her out on a Disney date and again everything was perfect but still I didn't kiss her at the end of the night just long hugs and a kiss on the cheek and she told me how I ones ever done something like this for her. Fast forward we went on a few more dates and I thought everything was going perfect although we didn't see each other for 2 weeks. I wanted to hangout with her and ask her to be my gf but I didn't want her to be even more stressed if we did hangout and I wanted to so bad but when it came the the weekend she would mention that she needed to study and catch up bc she had test every week same as me. So I didn't ask her to hangout bc I rather have both of us get through this stressful semester and pass with a good grade and I thought that either way it was going to be over in two weeks and then we would be able to hangout and I was going to ask her out to be my gf the weekend of Valentine's Day. I gave her roses to remind her that even though we haven't hung out that I still cared and missed her. But that weekend she told me she lost interest in me and I asked how and she said bc we didn't get to see each other and hangout. I knew where she was coming from but I felt the same but knew I was going the right thing by having us focus on our class and after we could hangout every other day and not have to worry about having to study for a test or school the next day. I really miss her bc she was different and the connection we have was amazing. I don't know what to do at this point the last thing I told her was "you know where I stand and how I feel so if you decide to change your mind just get in touch with me. I here asking if someone can give me advice to see how I may have another chance with her.

[GoldSparkz]

It seems to me that she wanted things to progress much quicker than what you were comfortable with. You mention you don't like to have sex on the first date - did she give you any inclination that this is what she wanted? Also, did she give you the impression that she wanted to be kissed?

 

If you hadn't kissed her in the time that you were dating then she may have felt as though you weren't interested ...especially if you went 2 weeks without seeing each other.

 

Sounds like she wanted you to take the lead from a romance point of view. As a female, I prefer to benkissed by the 3rd date at least otherwise, I'd assume the guy wasn't interested.

 

Perhaps next time, you should tell the girl that you're a slow burner and prefer to take your time. That way she won't assume that you're not interested.

[Davidcee]

It seems to me that she wanted things to progress much quicker than what you were comfortable with. You mention you don't like to have sex on the first date - did she give you any inclination that this is what she wanted? Also, did she give you the impression that she wanted to be kissed?

 

If you hadn't kissed her in the time that you were dating then she may have felt as though you weren't interested ...especially if you went 2 weeks without seeing each other.

 

Sounds like she wanted you to take the lead from a romance point of view. As a female, I prefer to benkissed by the 3rd date at least otherwise, I'd assume the guy wasn't interested.

 

Perhaps next time, you should tell the girl that you're a slow burner and prefer to take your time. That way she won't assume that you're not interested.

not really besides this one time she asked if I could drop her off on the side of her house not in front. I'm not sure if that was an indication but I would tell her I missed her and I couldn't wait after the two weeks bc we would both be free and be able to hangout and I would consistently remind her of that. Do you think there's any way of me getting another chance? I mean I did what was best for us as in school first rather one of us not passing. I took the chance because I thought she would understand where I was coming from.

[d0nnivain]

You wanted to be her BF but you needed to check the paternalistic attitude at the door.

 

 

I'd be furious at some guy who I went on a couple of dates with me who had the audacity to think he knew what was best for me in terms of how to balance school & my dating life. How dare you?

 

 

If you needed more time to study that is fine but that is your choice. Most women would dump you in that case because nobody is too busy to spare an hour for a coffee on weekends. Heck you could have arranged to sit next to each other at the library & study. Instead by your actions you told her she is not a priority to you & now you are shocked that she didn't meekly accept her secondary role in your life.

 

 

The summer I was studying for my professional licensing exam My BF & I would attend the classes in the morning, meet for lunch for 1 hour, & go our separate ways. On Saturdays I'd come over & we'd put the books away. It was a good balance.

[Davidcee]

You wanted to be her BF but you needed to check the paternalistic attitude at the door.

 

 

I'd be furious at some guy who I went on a couple of dates with me who had the audacity to think he knew what was best for me in terms of how to balance school & my dating life. How dare you?

 

 

If you needed more time to study that is fine but that is your choice. Most women would dump you in that case because nobody is too busy to spare an hour for a coffee on weekends. Heck you could have arranged to sit next to each other at the library & study. Instead by your actions you told her she is not a priority to you & now you are shocked that she didn't meekly accept her secondary role in your life.

 

 

The summer I was studying for my professional licensing exam My BF & I would attend the classes in the morning, meet for lunch for 1 hour, & go our separate ways. On Saturdays I'd come over & we'd put the books away. It was a good balance.

Yes I do agree with what you are saying.. it makes complete sense to me and know that I was the one who messed up is there a way to bring her back into my life and make things right I mean I didn't hurt her I Emily just made a mistake due to lack of experience..