1Jessie86 Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 Should a man who works long hours still be expected to take a woman out on a date rather than staying in and relaxing? I met him a few months ago and we've hung out multiple times. We see eachother every few weeks or so. We're both in our 30s. I'm fine staying in and relaxing, I would just hate for it to become a routine. Link to post Share on other sites
4kad Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 Should a man who works long hours still be expected to take a woman out on a date rather than staying in and relaxing? I met him a few months ago and we've hung out multiple times. We see eachother every few weeks or so. We're both in our 30s. I'm fine staying in and relaxing, I would just hate for it to become a routine. Could be because it's winter time. I can't see someone doing that in May and June 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Simple Logic Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 Should a man who works long hours still be expected to take a woman out on a date rather than staying in and relaxing? I met him a few months ago and we've hung out multiple times. We see eachother every few weeks or so. We're both in our 30s. I'm fine staying in and relaxing, I would just hate for it to become a routine. Go out and have a good time. There will be plenty of time to stay in and relax when you are 80. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 1Jessie86 Posted January 19, 2017 Author Share Posted January 19, 2017 Could be because it's winter time. I can't see someone doing that in May and June I doubt it. I live in sunny San Diego. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author 1Jessie86 Posted January 19, 2017 Author Share Posted January 19, 2017 Go out and have a good time. There will be plenty of time to stay in and relax when you are 80. I'm not saying I want to go out and party, it just would be nice to try something new. I live in Cali, that's so much to do! Link to post Share on other sites
4kad Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 I doubt it. I live in sunny San Diego. Ok then that sounds off and yall should get out and have fun Link to post Share on other sites
mightycpa Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 Should a man who works long hours still be expected to take a woman out on a date rather than staying in and relaxing? I met him a few months ago and we've hung out multiple times. We see eachother every few weeks or so. We're both in our 30s. I'm fine staying in and relaxing, I would just hate for it to become a routine.Maybe a few years into it. Not after a few months though. That should be the exception, not the rule. Link to post Share on other sites
strawberryshortstack Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 Should a man who works long hours still be expected to take a woman out on a date rather than staying in and relaxing? I met him a few months ago and we've hung out multiple times. We see eachother every few weeks or so. We're both in our 30s. I'm fine staying in and relaxing, I would just hate for it to become a routine. I'd be more concerned about the frequency of the dates. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Author 1Jessie86 Posted January 19, 2017 Author Share Posted January 19, 2017 I'd be more concerned about the frequency of the dates. I'm not concerned about that. My work schedule and his Work schedule sometimes clashes since I usually work on the weekend and he has weekends off. Link to post Share on other sites
strawberryshortstack Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 I'm not concerned about that. My work schedule and his Work schedule sometimes clashes since I usually work on the weekend and he has weekends off. My situation is the same with my guy, but we always manage to find a way to spend at least one evening together per week (usually two, and sometimes three). It's going to be difficult to really get to know each other and form a bond if you're only seeing each other every few weeks. But whatever works for you. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Simple Logic Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 I'm not saying I want to go out and party, it just would be nice to try something new. I live in Cali, that's so much to do! I read on here all the time about the "hang out" date. Even if you are dirt poor there is better stuff to do than sitting at home. It is the sign of a lazy or cheap guy. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 OP, perhaps you should take the bull by the horns and suggest an activity for you two to do. Link to post Share on other sites
winny Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 See, its all about what the 2 of you want to do. Staying in and having intimate time is as much important as going out, with each other, without each other and with friends. You both have to decide what mix of things works best for the type of people you are. There are no rules or right and wrong. Do what makes you happy and whole and content. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
heavenonearth Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 Sounds like my perfect night. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Gr8fuln2020 Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 Should a man who works long hours still be expected to take a woman out on a date rather than staying in and relaxing? I met him a few months ago and we've hung out multiple times. We see eachother every few weeks or so. We're both in our 30s. I'm fine staying in and relaxing, I would just hate for it to become a routine. My view is NO, not acceptable. Not at this stage. You relationship is fledgling at best considering the time-frame and frequency in which you have dated. You say that you have 'hung-out' multiple times. Were these active dates that you found fitting? Have you two had sex? What do you think 'staying in and relaxing' will entail? Nope. If it were me, and especially a woman, I would stay away from 'staying in and relaxing' dates until you two know each other better. Have you or he been to oneanother's homes, yet? Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 Should a man who works long hours still be expected to take a woman out on a date rather than staying in and relaxing? I met him a few months ago and we've hung out multiple times. We see eachother every few weeks or so. We're both in our 30s. I'm fine staying in and relaxing, I would just hate for it to become a routine. Where do you hope to take this relationship at only 1 date every few weeks? It's not enough to build a bond and it's not enough to maintain that bond. At this rate in 2 years he'll still be a stranger. If you want a serious relationship you need to find someone available If you don't care about escalating this to a serious relationship than stay in all you want. You can't ruin what you haven't got, a relationship. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
phineas Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 I had a FWB from out of town for a yr. I saw her maybe twice a month. She'd drive 1.5hrs and want to just stay in and eat/drink/benefits. never wanted to go out even though i offered. my other friend from out of town can go either way. i have another female friend who spends more time in bars than an olympic athelete spends in the gym training so..... everyone is different. find someone who is on the same level as you. as far as the cheap comment made earlier, it's easy to call a guy cheap when he's the one expected to foot the bill when it comes to going out. Link to post Share on other sites
4kad Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 Plus going out all the time can become costly. Link to post Share on other sites
No_Go Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 We see eachother every few weeks or so. - that's extremely infrequent... to me it suggests very low interest, regardless of how busy you are. I actually enjoy more staying in - home cooked meal or take out, sex, good conversation. Actually I don't like going out too much because I can't have a proper conversation if we're doing an activity or sitting in a noisy bar/restaurant, and for me conversations are the key for bonding. Some people like to be out and about. What do you prefer? Should a man who works long hours still be expected to take a woman out on a date rather than staying in and relaxing? I met him a few months ago and we've hung out multiple times. We see eachother every few weeks or so. We're both in our 30s. I'm fine staying in and relaxing, I would just hate for it to become a routine. Link to post Share on other sites
Lilyana76 Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 I think staying in and relaxing is a very acceptable date, and preferable for me. I like to sit and watch some netflix and snuggle with a glass of wine. Sounds like a perfect evening to me. Plus, it makes conversation and getting to know someone more deeply, easier. Hard to have a deep meaningful conversation in a crowded, noisy environment. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
4kad Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 I think staying in and relaxing is a very acceptable date, and preferable for me. I like to sit and watch some netflix and snuggle with a glass of wine. Sounds like a perfect evening to me. Plus, it makes conversation and getting to know someone more deeply, easier. Hard to have a deep meaningful conversation in a crowded, noisy environment. I always try to go out and eat in a calm atmosphere instead of a Loud restaurant where we can barely hear each other. I definitely agree Link to post Share on other sites
GunslingerRoland Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 I don't see the point of dating if you can only see the other person every few weeks. Is there an end in sight to that? Typically after a few months of relationship you aren't going out on "dates". You are just going out as a couple. But in this situation I guess you are still in the early dating phase. But I will say that if he doesn't like to go out, that probably isn't going to change much, do you want to be with a homebody? Also are you guys intimate yet? Because if you are, I can see wanting to stay in on the rare times you do see each other so you can actually have sex. If you aren't maybe he is staying in to try and lead towards that. Link to post Share on other sites
LivingDeadGrl Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 I read on here all the time about the "hang out" date. Even if you are dirt poor there is better stuff to do than sitting at home. It is the sign of a lazy or cheap guy. Disagree. I like staying in and cuddling and watching movies. Some people are just homebodies and prefer the comfort of their own homes. This doesn't mean they are lazy or cheap by any means. My guy and I hang out at each others houses all the time doing this because our schedules clash so sometimes it's just easier. We enjoy each others company. Keep in mind though that this isn't ALL we do. We do other things as well, when we can. I can see if this is the only thing you ever do how it would be boring, but seeing as you only see him every few weeks I don't think there is even much to worry about. Is this even considered dating? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
4kad Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 Disagree. I like staying in and cuddling and watching movies. Some people are just homebodies and prefer the comfort of their own homes. This doesn't mean they are lazy or cheap by any means. My guy and I hang out at each others houses all the time doing this because our schedules clash so sometimes it's just easier. We enjoy each others company. Keep in mind though that this isn't ALL we do. We do other things as well, when we can. I can see if this is the only thing you ever do how it would be boring, but seeing as you only see him every few weeks I don't think there is even much to worry about. Is this even considered dating? Doesn't sound like dating to me. Link to post Share on other sites
strawberryshortstack Posted January 19, 2017 Share Posted January 19, 2017 I read on here all the time about the "hang out" date. Even if you are dirt poor there is better stuff to do than sitting at home. It is the sign of a lazy or cheap guy. I disagree. My boyfriend and I sit at home almost every time we see each other. We do go out now and then when there's something we both want to do, but we mostly both enjoy staying in. He's not cheap, and he's not lazy. We cook and eat dinner together, we play games, we watch whatever show we are currently watching as a couple, and most of all, we enjoy each other's company. Different people have different dating styles, and sometimes, you find someone whose dating style matches yours - it doesn't make that person cheap or lazy. However, I still stand by what I said in my first reply - the frequency with which they see each other would be an issue for me. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts