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So there's this girl at the gym. (Warning, long post)


Praeteritum

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Praeteritum

I started going to the gym a year and a half ago, and about 6-7 months ago a girl got a membership there. I found her very attractive but never did anything about it, mostly ignored her and focused on my workout. But she started always staring and checking me out.

 

So there's a guy that started talking to her about 3-4 months ago, and now they're gym partners. So I was like "dang it, lost my chance." But even with the guy with her she was still staring at me, and checking me out. So I eventually gave in and started shooting her a lot of stares and we are locking eyes a lot. My gym friends keep telling me to go get her number and so on and so on...but I couldn't build up the confidence to do it! People tell me I'm a very good looking guy, and I hope that doesn't come off as me being full of myself. So last week was the last week I saw her with her "man", or whatever (she recently has been coming a lot later, and I haven't seen her with him). They might just be gym partners/friends but I doubt they're together.

 

So...I was checking her out last week on Friday, and she caught me I think, I say I think because I saw half her face due to some machinery in the way, and for a solid 5 seconds we stared at each other, she smiled really wide into what almost looks like a laugh. So this week, on Tuesday, I got the confidence to introduce myself. She was really nice, and I told her I admired her dedication. She responded with "thanks, you too, I really like your arms." So is that flirting right there or what? I told her I was going to get back to my workout and I'll let her get back to hers, and apologized if I interrupted anything. She said it was totally fine. After her set she gave me a really good smile, and I smiled back. When she left she had a grin on her face the whole way out of the gym.

 

Anyways...on Wednesday I saw her again and about 30 mins-in of my workout she walks all the way over by me and sits in a machine close by me. I kept glancing over to her but she wasn't looking at me, just sitting there and not working out. So I get done with my first workout and go over to use a different machine. I grab more weight and we both lock eyes and she gives me a "what's up" sort of facial expression. I just smiled, or grinned, or half of a grin, I don't really know I could've given her a weird look but I hope not, I was just nervous and tired from hitting a set. So after I hit another set I get up to refill my water bottle and during that she walks right passed me and leaves. I guessing she didn't want to bother me?

 

Anyways I went to workout last night and I saw her parked in the parking lot and she left as soon as I stepped foot out of my car, so she must've just got done and she got there way earlier than me. Maybe she's avoiding me? I have been coming later, but I notice when I change up my schedule she does too.

 

Anyways, I need advice. I know the gym isn't a place to pick up girls but I've seen this girl for months and she's always staring at me. I would like to ask her out, but I hope she didn't get the wrong impression from the other night when she deliberately came over by me and waited for me to talk to her. Dang it!

 

Anyways help me out! Should I keep trying? Take it slower? Or completely ignore her and continue the staring game we've been playing? Should I let her initiate the next time? Is she interested? Am I thinking way too much about this? Should I just continue my gym routine and ignore her? Thank you! (btw I'm not at the gym to pick up girls, it's just this girl is a regular and I've developed a "gym crush" on her)

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I started going to the gym a year and a half ago, and about 6-7 months ago a girl got a membership there. I found her very attractive but never did anything about it, mostly ignored her and focused on my workout. But she started always staring and checking me out.

 

So there's a guy that started talking to her about 3-4 months ago, and now they're gym partners. So I was like "dang it, lost my chance." But even with the guy with her she was still staring at me, and checking me out. So I eventually gave in and started shooting her a lot of stares and we are locking eyes a lot. My gym friends keep telling me to go get her number and so on and so on...but I couldn't build up the confidence to do it! People tell me I'm a very good looking guy, and I hope that doesn't come off as me being full of myself. So last week was the last week I saw her with her "man", or whatever (she recently has been coming a lot later, and I haven't seen her with him). They might just be gym partners/friends but I doubt they're together.

 

So...I was checking her out last week on Friday, and she caught me I think, I say I think because I saw half her face due to some machinery in the way, and for a solid 5 seconds we stared at each other, she smiled really wide into what almost looks like a laugh. So this week, on Tuesday, I got the confidence to introduce myself. She was really nice, and I told her I admired her dedication. She responded with "thanks, you too, I really like your arms." So is that flirting right there or what? I told her I was going to get back to my workout and I'll let her get back to hers, and apologized if I interrupted anything. She said it was totally fine. After her set she gave me a really good smile, and I smiled back. When she left she had a grin on her face the whole way out of the gym.

 

Anyways...on Wednesday I saw her again and about 30 mins-in of my workout she walks all the way over by me and sits in a machine close by me. I kept glancing over to her but she wasn't looking at me, just sitting there and not working out. So I get done with my first workout and go over to use a different machine. I grab more weight and we both lock eyes and she gives me a "what's up" sort of facial expression. I just smiled, or grinned, or half of a grin, I don't really know I could've given her a weird look but I hope not, I was just nervous and tired from hitting a set. So after I hit another set I get up to refill my water bottle and during that she walks right passed me and leaves. I guessing she didn't want to bother me?

 

Anyways I went to workout last night and I saw her parked in the parking lot and she left as soon as I stepped foot out of my car, so she must've just got done and she got there way earlier than me. Maybe she's avoiding me? I have been coming later, but I notice when I change up my schedule she does too.

 

Anyways, I need advice. I know the gym isn't a place to pick up girls but I've seen this girl for months and she's always staring at me. I would like to ask her out, but I hope she didn't get the wrong impression from the other night when she deliberately came over by me and waited for me to talk to her. Dang it!

 

Anyways help me out! Should I keep trying? Take it slower? Or completely ignore her and continue the staring game we've been playing? Should I let her initiate the next time? Is she interested? Am I thinking way too much about this? Should I just continue my gym routine and ignore her? Thank you! (btw I'm not at the gym to pick up girls, it's just this girl is a regular and I've developed a "gym crush" on her)

 

You might have creeped her out with all the staring.

 

Next time just casually talk to her, or other girls, don't make a big deal of it, and stop putting pressure about getting numbers in your head.

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HumanMachine

Sounds very creepy, probably brought the other guy along to send you a message.

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Why is it those that warn us of long posts we find are never that long and those who write a book never warn us? :)

 

My guess is that she came right over to the machine next to you just to get you to talk to her and since you ignored her, she gives you the "Whats up" expression, to which you just grinned. which may have been interpreted as you laughing at her arrogantly...

 

At that point she gave up on you and I guess she is avoiding you.

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mortensorchid

If you like her, I think you should go for it. You're only putting things off longer and longer and her interest (if any) will start to wane.

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She was hoping you would have the confidence (b^&%$) to talk to her again,....you are going to blow it if you keep this up. Just keep talking to her....she just like anyone else.

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callingyouuu

Especially after you've had that first conversation, staring without talking to her just comes across as super creepy. She was hoping you'd start a conversation when she sat close by, and when you didn't, she felt awkward about it and started avoiding you.

 

The window is closing! Just have a chat. If she acts friendly and receptive, ask for her number.

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Continue the staring game and see another guy go to her quietly and start chatting her up and sweep her away.

Or

You be the guy who does the above.

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Praeteritum
You might have creeped her out with all the staring.

 

Next time just casually talk to her, or other girls, don't make a big deal of it, and stop putting pressure about getting numbers in your head.

 

Here's the thing though, I'm not the only one staring, it's her mainly. I just started because I think she may be really interested. This has been going on for months.

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Praeteritum
Sounds very creepy, probably brought the other guy along to send you a message.

 

Na, I don't see it like that, because they met inside the gym. And even with all the chatting I still saw her glancing over at me through the mirrors.

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Praeteritum

And she's always found a way to sit close to me or be by me so I'm sure this won't be the only time. I just have to stop being @&$%# and talk to her more.

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Here's the thing though, I'm not the only one staring, it's her mainly. I just started because I think she may be really interested. This has been going on for months.

 

So she's looking at you for one of two reasons:

 

She is interested and is waiting for you to talk to her. In which case you kinda blew it by ignoring her when she sat beside you.

If so then you need to ask her out.

 

Or she is checking to see if you are staring at her because it creeps her out.

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HumanMachine
Na, I don't see it like that, because they met inside the gym. And even with all the chatting I still saw her glancing over at me through the mirrors.

 

Seeing her through machinary, in the mirrors.. Wtf dude you need to chill

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CryForNoOne
Seeing her through machinary, in the mirrors.. Wtf dude you need to chill

 

C'mon. Who doesn't do this? I do it all the time. It just means I like to look at pretty girls. There really isn't much else to do while lifting except to look at yourself other people...

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HumanMachine
C'mon. Who doesn't do this? I do it all the time. It just means I like to look at pretty girls. There really isn't much else to do while lifting except to look at yourself other people...

 

I go to the gym to train, i'd rather not inflate some bunny's ego..

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You've had plenty of hints. I have some of my best girl friendships from those I've met at the gym. Very awkward initially but all have said they were so happy I talked to them and had been wanting me to for weeks. Unfortunately one ended up being married. That's sucked

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Praeteritum
Seeing her through machinary, in the mirrors.. Wtf dude you need to chill

 

Look man, I ain't no creep, far from it. But it's different if she's constantly looking at ME for months. And then when I talked to her, she was really nice and flirted with me. And I go to the gym to train as well, I've gained 30 pounds of muscle from this, so I've developed a very serious attachment to the gym, but when you see a very attractive girl staring at you all the time for a good 6 months, and always taking off her headphones when she's sitting next to me on other machines, she really digs me, an I do see that now. So you can **** off with your negativity, because I'm unsubscribing from this thread and I'm gonna go for it because I've got nothing to lose. If all fails the worst thing I got is motivation to be better than what I already am. And she can watch me grow even bigger ;) Peace and love guys, appreciate all the POSITIVE feedback. I got this ✌?️

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HopefulJacob96

I agree with what others have said - I think you should try to talk to her. I think that any potential misunderstanding could be cleared up by talking to her more. If she isn't interested, she will probably make that clear in conversation, and then you can move on. If she continues to avoid conversation, I'd take that as her not being interested too. If she is interested though, she'll probably make that clear with her body language in conversation. Just try to use discernment when approaching her to talk. Wait until she seems happy to see you, and you can try conversation again then.

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