Girls any tips for me on using dating apps like Tinder , Meetme, and Skout?

[Curious-One]

Id like to think i am average guy maybe 5-6/10. Typically i use my goofy outgoing personality to get girls in real life and i am tall (6'5) as well so that helps.

 

I know being a average looking guy on tinder and other OLD sites is kinda pointless as even average girls are bombarded with 100's of messages and compliments a day from many different guys online. Thats the reason i never really tried it but curiosity has gotten the better of me and i installed the apps added my pics and have been messaging girls on Skout. I messeged maybe 30 of them and only 2-3 replied with short messages. Few girls liked my pics but they were few hours away.

 

Any tips on what my opening message should be about or do you guys just respond to the hottest guys that msg you? Also id like to pm a girl here my pics that i am using and you can tell me what you think if i should try and take some better pics.

 

GOD it would be nice to be a girl in OLD ... brb post some pics and get 100's of likes msgs matches a day and you can pick and choose who you want to talk to. As a guy brb sending 100's of msgs and get happy when you see few replies lol.

Edited January 9, 2016 by Curious-One

[lehcar]

IDK how great it is being a girl on online dating... sounds like a grass is always greener sort of philosophy there. Yeah, you get a lot of messages from guys every day but the majority of them are pretty sleazy. Or, they start out nice and once you get a conversation going they ask for a naked pic or when you want to meet up for sex. That's just the communicating, not even the dating part of those applications!

 

But as for a good message, usually on Tinder, I respond to guys that just say something normal like hey, how's it going? and then if a nice conversation comes out of that, I'll meet with them. Usually if they send a long canned message, I ignore it. On sites like OKC, I'm more likely to respond to a short, sweet message if, when I check their profile, I see things that we have in common or qualities that they have that I respect and desire in a man. Long messages, even when not canned, I usually don't respond to unless their profile is amazing, because it's just way too much. As for pictures, post flattering but accurate photos. To me a person's profile is the most important thing and I'd rather date a really fascinating 6 than a boring 10.

[Curious-One]

IDK how great it is being a girl on online dating... sounds like a grass is always greener sort of philosophy there. Yeah, you get a lot of messages from guys every day but the majority of them are pretty sleazy. Or, they start out nice and once you get a conversation going they ask for a naked pic or when you want to meet up for sex. That's just the communicating, not even the dating part of those applications!

 

But as for a good message, usually on Tinder, I respond to guys that just say something normal like hey, how's it going? and then if a nice conversation comes out of that, I'll meet with them. Usually if they send a long canned message, I ignore it. On sites like OKC, I'm more likely to respond to a short, sweet message if, when I check their profile, I see things that we have in common or qualities that they have that I respect and desire in a man. Long messages, even when not canned, I usually don't respond to unless their profile is amazing, because it's just way too much. As for pictures, post flattering but accurate photos. To me a person's profile is the most important thing and I'd rather date a really fascinating 6 than a boring 10.

 

Well the way i see it is id rather get 100 msgs and have a chance to weed out the creeps even if it is like 95% then send out 100 msgs and not even get a chance to do that lol.

[Ally33]

You say that you send about 30 messages a day. Nothing wrong with that as you are trying to meet someone, but you need to make sure that your messages don't look that way. Use humour, ask a question or say something specific to the girls profile. Make it short but not boring like 'hi how are you' or generic like 'I really like your profile'. Messages like that just look like they are copied and pasted. A funny comment about someone's photo is always good e.g. If they are wearing a silly xmas sweater 'Nice jumper, can I borrow it?' Be a little cheeky but without being rude or overtly sexual. Also think about what it is you're looking for? In my experience tinder appeals more to people who are looking for casual whereas some other sites are more about serious relationships. If you're not getting the right response it could be that how you're coming across doesn't match up to what sort of website you're using. Also choose your photos carefully. Choose photos of you smiling and having fun, showing that you have lots of interests. Don't use selfies or photos of drunken nights out. Also avoid text speak and bad spelling

[thecrucible]

But as for a good message, usually on Tinder, I respond to guys that just say something normal like hey, how's it going? and then if a nice conversation comes out of that, I'll meet with them. Usually if they send a long canned message, I ignore it. On sites like OKC, I'm more likely to respond to a short, sweet message if, when I check their profile, I see things that we have in common or qualities that they have that I respect and desire in a man. Long messages, even when not canned, I usually don't respond to unless their profile is amazing, because it's just way too much. As for pictures, post flattering but accurate photos. To me a person's profile is the most important thing and I'd rather date a really fascinating 6 than a boring 10.

 

This! I just want a guy who'll talk to me like he would if he met in person somewhere - none of this convoluted stuff. Let's just keep it real.

[Curious-One]

bump old thread back in the game

[AMJ]

So I think women who get all blustery about the empty messages in OLD are actually a) not really that interested in dating (Still getting over a breakup likely) or b) not that interested in the guy and just use his lame message as an excuse.

 

Because, seriously tell me ladies, that if a guy sends you a message, you click on his profile for 20 seconds, and he seems intriguing for whatever reason, you're not going to respond simply because his opening message was "Hi Sarah, how's your day going?"

 

Nope. No way. If you like the guy, you reply. The only way a guy can ruin an opening message is by being a creepy pervert or otherwise rude. I think it's fine for guys to send copy and paste opening messages. I really don't expect them to analyze my profile and act like I'm super special based on the four photos and little blurb I wrote about myself. Women who think that, and expect that- are expecting WAY too much. Just say something polite, warm, and friendly. "Hi Sarah, hope you're having a great day! Loved your profile." The only thing I do think is important is using their name. But that's not too much to type, is it?

 

Now if you can't keep a conversation going PAST the opening message, then we have a problem.

 

So, your best bet OP is just to play it like a numbers game. Keep sending out tons of messages or winks or whatever. And if you really aren't getting any responses, we need to reevaluate your profile or you need to start messaging less attractive women. It's always one of those two things.

 

Aside from that, I have tons and tons of advice about what not to do on a date. Because every guy I go out with keeps blowing my expectations out of the water in a terrible way.

[NJ123]

So I think women who get all blustery about the empty messages in OLD are actually a) not really that interested in dating (Still getting over a breakup likely) or b) not that interested in the guy and just use his lame message as an excuse.

 

Because, seriously tell me ladies, that if a guy sends you a message, you click on his profile for 20 seconds, and he seems intriguing for whatever reason, you're not going to respond simply because his opening message was "Hi Sarah, how's your day going?"

 

Nope. No way. If you like the guy, you reply. The only way a guy can ruin an opening message is by being a creepy pervert or otherwise rude. I think it's fine for guys to send copy and paste opening messages. I really don't expect them to analyze my profile and act like I'm super special based on the four photos and little blurb I wrote about myself. Women who think that, and expect that- are expecting WAY too much. Just say something polite, warm, and friendly. "Hi Sarah, hope you're having a great day! Loved your profile." The only thing I do think is important is using their name. But that's not too much to type, is it?

 

Now if you can't keep a conversation going PAST the opening message, then we have a problem.

 

So, your best bet OP is just to play it like a numbers game. Keep sending out tons of messages or winks or whatever. And if you really aren't getting any responses, we need to reevaluate your profile or you need to start messaging less attractive women. It's always one of those two things.

 

Aside from that, I have tons and tons of advice about what not to do on a date. Because every guy I go out with keeps blowing my expectations out of the water in a terrible way.

 

I actually agree with all that except for you suggesting messaging less attractive women. But it depends on what you exactly mean by less attractive. I think we've been over this already a little while ago. But to suggest to someone to message women they have little or no attraction to completely ruins the purpose of even trying to date. Since why would a guy want to waste his time with a woman he's not that attracted to?

[AMJ]

I actually agree with all that except for you suggesting messaging less attractive women. But it depends on what you exactly mean by less attractive. I think we've been over this already a little while ago. But to suggest to someone to message women they have little or no attraction to completely ruins the purpose of even trying to date. Since why would a guy want to waste his time with a woman he's not that attracted to?

 

NJ it's like searching for jobs you aren't qualified for. You're searching for a match, someone who is going to love you as much as you love them. Someone with whom you are compatible. If in OLD you never get responses, you likely are approaching women who have better options, at least that's how they view it.

That's harsh, but such is life. I don't make the rules.

He said he's a 5, he should be asking out other 5's.

Yeah it's okay to ask out the 9s and 10s, why not? But if you want results, you need to talk to people who are going to respond to you.

[NJ123]

NJ it's like searching for jobs you aren't qualified for. You're searching for a match, someone who is going to love you as much as you love them. Someone with whom you are compatible. If in OLD you never get responses, you likely are approaching women who have better options, at least that's how they view it.

That's harsh, but such is life. I don't make the rules.

He said he's a 5, he should be asking out other 5's.

Yeah it's okay to ask out the 9s and 10s, why not? But if you want results, you need to talk to people who are going to respond to you.

 

I forgot that he rated himself in his first post. So I guess it's fair to not leave out those women that are in that same range of looks. I just think one has to be attracted to the other person though or else it's not going to work.

[Curious-One]

So I think women who get all blustery about the empty messages in OLD are actually a) not really that interested in dating (Still getting over a breakup likely) or b) not that interested in the guy and just use his lame message as an excuse.

 

Because, seriously tell me ladies, that if a guy sends you a message, you click on his profile for 20 seconds, and he seems intriguing for whatever reason, you're not going to respond simply because his opening message was "Hi Sarah, how's your day going?"

 

Nope. No way. If you like the guy, you reply. The only way a guy can ruin an opening message is by being a creepy pervert or otherwise rude. I think it's fine for guys to send copy and paste opening messages. I really don't expect them to analyze my profile and act like I'm super special based on the four photos and little blurb I wrote about myself. Women who think that, and expect that- are expecting WAY too much. Just say something polite, warm, and friendly. "Hi Sarah, hope you're having a great day! Loved your profile." The only thing I do think is important is using their name. But that's not too much to type, is it?

 

Now if you can't keep a conversation going PAST the opening message, then we have a problem.

 

So, your best bet OP is just to play it like a numbers game. Keep sending out tons of messages or winks or whatever. And if you really aren't getting any responses, we need to reevaluate your profile or you need to start messaging less attractive women. It's always one of those two things.

 

Aside from that, I have tons and tons of advice about what not to do on a date. Because every guy I go out with keeps blowing my expectations out of the water in a terrible way.

 

Thanks for a great post and please do share aobut what NOT to do on a date. Would also love to hear some of your stories...seems like they could be very entertaining.

 

Grabs popcorn and waits...

[Buddhist]

GOD it would be nice to be a girl in OLD ... brb post some pics and get 100's of likes msgs matches a day and you can pick and choose who you want to talk to. As a guy brb sending 100's of msgs and get happy when you see few replies lol.

 

I've got an idea. I'll give you my pics, you can put them up on OLD and get bombarded with msg's from 80yr olds who are 'young at heart' and trying their luck. My question is this, if you are male how do you know all the women are getting 100's of msgs a day? Being told they are wonderful by all and sundry? Or did you.....*gasp* make that %$@# up?

[Curious-One]

I've got an idea. I'll give you my pics, you can put them up on OLD and get bombarded with msg's from 80yr olds who are 'young at heart' and trying their luck. My question is this, if you are male how do you know all the women are getting 100's of msgs a day? Being told they are wonderful by all and sundry? Or did you.....*gasp* make that %$@# up?

 

Lol a 4-5 years ago after sending out 100's of messages and getting 4-5 replies i decide to delete OLD but before i did it i decided to make a fake girl profile. I took an average girl pics from my fb and created a profile barelly filled out the profile and within few hours the profile had 100's of messages from guys. I ended up deleting the profile after only few hours fully understanding why i was getting only few responses for every 100 msgs i sent.... my msgs were getting burried by all the other 100s maybe 1000's of msgs girls were receiving daily.

 

The fake profile i created used an average girl , i can only imagine what happens if a girl is very attractive. I didnt look over too many msgs but the few i looked over were from guys that were above average in looks definitely higher attractiveness level then the girl

Edited September 29, 2016 by Curious-One