Islander19 Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 So I met this girl through OLD a couple weeks ago. I was a little wary at first as she's quite a bit younger than me (I'm 27 and she's 20) but we had a lot of common interests and she seemed nice, so I decided to give her a shot. We started texting and we seemed to be hitting it off. I suggested we get together sometime during the upcoming weekend, but she said she was busy spending time with her family. She definitely seemed interested in meeting though and we continued texting on and off. She texted me late Saturday night and asked what I was up to. When I said I was just hanging out at home she phoned me and we ended up talking until about 4 in the morning. It was really good talk and the conversation flowed easily. I went to bed that night (or morning by the time we were done) feeling like this girl had a lot of potential. However, over the next couple of days texting was sparse. We couldn't really seem to connect and she was taking a long time to answer my texts. After a few days I sent her a text one night asking her if she wanted to stop by my work. I have pretty flexible hours and can take an extended lunch break here and there if I want. I told her if she came by one afternoon I'd treat her to lunch and we would have a chance to meet in person. I didn't hear back from her that night, or the following morning or afternoon, so I figured she had probably lost interest. Then the next night she texts me asking if we could meet the next day for lunch. I said sure. It was a little odd she took that long to reply to my text but whatever, I figured she was just busy. I didn't hear from her the next morning. At 11:30 I sent her a text asking if we were still on for lunch, since I had told her she could come by around noon. She texted back saying "Yeah, we can have lunch today if you like." I was a little miffed, because I thought we had plans. Her response made it seem like we didn't. Like if I hadn't of sent that text she wouldn't have come. But whatever. I said I'd be interested in having lunch. Sure enough, she was there in 30 minutes and we had lunch. Lunch with her was great. Once again we had a really great talk and it seemed like she had a really great time. She also mentioned she had bought me a Christmas gift. Part of me was flattered and part of me thought that was a little weird, since we had just met. She brushed it off saying she buys all her friends gifts, and assured me I shouldn't get her anything. I chose to take it has a good sign. She thanked me several times for lunch before she left and then gave me a big hug. Usually I don't put a lot of weight on hugs. Assuming the initial meeting goes well a hug is kind of a given. But when she hugged me she pulled me really close and held on for a good 5 seconds. I don't know, maybe I'm blowing it out of proportion, but that hug seemed a little more than I usually get at the end of a first meeting. No more than 5 minutes after she left she sent me a text and we exchanged messages throughout the rest of the day. She seemed to be really positive about our meeting so I figured another date was pretty likely. I didn't hear from her the next day though, which was fine. I had a busy day at work anyways and thought it would be best to play it cool. The next day was Saturday (yesterday). I sent her a text that morning just seeing what she had going on over the weekend, and said if she was free I'd be interested in meeting up again. I haven't heard from her since. Usually when something like this happens I figure the girl has just lost interest, or the date didn't go as well as I thought, but everything seemed to be so positive after our first meeting. I've just been so confused with this girl. There's been several times where I thought she had lost interest, and several times where I've thought she's really into me. Generally in the past when girls have been really into me things have happened easily. They always get right back to me and quickly agree to a time and place to meet up. So this makes me think I should just forget about this girl. But part of me still thinks she's interested and I should try again. Who knows, maybe she meant to text back but got really busy? I don't want to keep bothering her if she's not interested, but I also don't want to give up if she still is interested. Anyone have any thoughts? Maybe this isn't too complicated but I still don't have a lot of dating experience so I'm worried I may be giving up on this too soon. Link to post Share on other sites
AspenBaldwin Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 Is she is hot and cold there is a chance she could be going through menopause. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 She's juggling guys or she expects a guy to be texting her every two mins. Link to post Share on other sites
Erik30 Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 I think you're texting and calling too much, plus you're being too available. She probably thought it was exciting at first, seeing an "older" guy, but lost interest at some point. Maybe texting her on a Saturday to ask if she already has plans for the weekend, makes it seem to her like you have nothing going in your life. Girls in their early 20s change their mind all the time. (Which sucks I know) I would just wait till she texts you, and if she does, make plans. If she's still interested, she knows how to reach you. Move on in the meantime Link to post Share on other sites
Author Islander19 Posted December 14, 2015 Author Share Posted December 14, 2015 She's juggling guys or she expects a guy to be texting her every two mins. I don't care if she's seeing other guys, we've only been on one date. Even if she was seeing more than one guy I still feel like she'd get back to me in a reasonable mount of time if she was interested. And if she expects me to be texting her every two minutes why does it sometime take her a day or more to get back to me? Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 Maybe because she is an immature 20 year old that still feels the world still revolves around her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Islander19 Posted December 14, 2015 Author Share Posted December 14, 2015 I think you're texting and calling too much, plus you're being too available. She probably thought it was exciting at first, seeing an "older" guy, but lost interest at some point. Maybe texting her on a Saturday to ask if she already has plans for the weekend, makes it seem to her like you have nothing going in your life. Girls in their early 20s change their mind all the time. (Which sucks I know) I would just wait till she texts you, and if she does, make plans. If she's still interested, she knows how to reach you. Move on in the meantime I don't know if I've been texting too much. We'd exchange a few messages throughout the day leading up to the date. I'd say she was initiating the conversations 50% of the time. She was the one driving all the text after our date, and then I didn't even text her the day after. I do agree though that I probably should have messaged her with a time and place to meet up on Saturday, rather than just ask her to let me know if she was free. Still, if she was really interested none of this would have mattered. She would have been happy I wanted to meet up again and we would have made plans. I find when someone's really into you you don't have to play these games, it just happens because the interest is mutual. Which makes me think I should just drop this girl and move on. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 Obviously she's not the one that fits your expectations. Next her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Islander19 Posted December 14, 2015 Author Share Posted December 14, 2015 Maybe because she is an immature 20 year old that still feels the world still revolves around her. Haha, yes, that is quite likely. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts