towardthefuture Posted December 1, 2015 Share Posted December 1, 2015 I'm dating this girl, I feel like she's leading me on and using me. But I don't know. I'd like some other opinions. Here are the details. We dated before for 3 months. I thought the reasons that ended were that I was smothering her, she said the other night it's because we moved too fast and miscommunicated. Since then we've been on about 4 dates. First date we full on made out. Second date we kissed a little. Last two dates she wouldn't let me kiss her but she is still saying things like "I think we have potential". Today I saw her flirting with another person who works at our work. Trying not to let it bother me. I walked her out after work and she gave me a hug as she was going to meet her friend. I missed an opportunity to kiss her there. I sent her a FB message that said something like next time we hang out let's do something fun, and I should've kissed you right then. She didn't read or respond to the message. Right now she's online and I sent her "you up?" and she also didn't read or respond to it. What's happened here? Am I done? Should I just break up before she tries to friend zone me? Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden2 Posted December 1, 2015 Share Posted December 1, 2015 I'm dating this girl, I feel like she's leading me on and using me. But I don't know. I'd like some other opinions. Here are the details. We dated before for 3 months. I thought the reasons that ended were that I was smothering her, she said the other night it's because we moved too fast and miscommunicated. Since then we've been on about 4 dates. First date we full on made out. Second date we kissed a little. Last two dates she wouldn't let me kiss her but she is still saying things like "I think we have potential". Today I saw her flirting with another person who works at our work. Trying not to let it bother me. I walked her out after work and she gave me a hug as she was going to meet her friend. I missed an opportunity to kiss her there. I sent her a FB message that said something like next time we hang out let's do something fun, and I should've kissed you right then. She didn't read or respond to the message. Right now she's online and I sent her "you up?" and she also didn't read or respond to it. What's happened here? Am I done? Should I just break up before she tries to friend zone me? 1: You were already broken up. 2: She's treating you like an option. A good deal to hang out with until she finds a better deal. 3: When you break up, you don't then carry on dating, because that means diddly-squat. 4: Read the NC Guide in my signature. Implement it and stick to it. (and you can only do that properly, by reading it properly. All your questions, answered....) 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author towardthefuture Posted December 1, 2015 Author Share Posted December 1, 2015 1: You were already broken up. 2: She's treating you like an option. A good deal to hang out with until she finds a better deal. 3: When you break up, you don't then carry on dating, because that means diddly-squat. 4: Read the NC Guide in my signature. Implement it and stick to it. (and you can only do that properly, by reading it properly. All your questions, answered....) 1 We weren't in a relationship, we were dating. 2 That's how I feel 3 There was a 5 month gap between when we ended things and starting now 4 Can't really go NC because we work together Link to post Share on other sites
Zippy2000 Posted December 1, 2015 Share Posted December 1, 2015 I'm dating this girl, I feel like she's leading me on and using me. But I don't know. I'd like some other opinions. Here are the details. We dated before for 3 months. I thought the reasons that ended were that I was smothering her, she said the other night it's because we moved too fast and miscommunicated. Since then we've been on about 4 dates. First date we full on made out. Second date we kissed a little. Last two dates she wouldn't let me kiss her but she is still saying things like "I think we have potential". Today I saw her flirting with another person who works at our work. Trying not to let it bother me. I walked her out after work and she gave me a hug as she was going to meet her friend. I missed an opportunity to kiss her there. I sent her a FB message that said something like next time we hang out let's do something fun, and I should've kissed you right then. She didn't read or respond to the message. Right now she's online and I sent her "you up?" and she also didn't read or respond to it. What's happened here? Am I done? Should I just break up before she tries to friend zone me? If you read you post again. It sounds like you were too heavy on her. You need to sometimes give a little breathing space to the girl as she has her own life too. Also next time dont go into detail telling her you should of kissed her. Not every girl likes to show public affection. Also when you send a FB message. Depending on your phone. You can still read the message without having to into go into Facebook. To ask if she is still up and she hasnt responded. I think you know where you stand now. Give her a few days radio silence or even a week to take a break from your constant smothering and messages. You need to live your own life too. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden2 Posted December 1, 2015 Share Posted December 1, 2015 1 We weren't in a relationship, we were dating. Thden it should be easy to quit - dating... 2 That's how I feel Go with your feelings. They're invariably right. The more she whistles and says 'here boy!' and the more you respond - the more right your feelings will be... 3 There was a 5 month gap between when we ended things and starting now Now begin again. Quit this yo-yo behaviour... 4 Can't really go NC because we work together A) Never, ever, EVER date in the workplace. When the crup hits the fan, and things go legs-up, you get nothing but grief, confusion and frankly, stupid behaviour. Oh look.... B) Proof-positive that you've not even looked at the NC GUide. It was originally written by a guy who worked with his ex: Same office, same environment. By the time he was well and truly over jher, by implementing his own Guide, she was crawling up the walls with frustration. And she dumped him. READ the Guide, and put it into practice. OK? Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted December 1, 2015 Share Posted December 1, 2015 It is the way you see it....you are just an option. Yes I agree she mislead you. Tip: when they put the breaks on, it's time to give up. "Moving too fast" means "I'm not that into you...." 1 Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted December 1, 2015 Share Posted December 1, 2015 Are you absolutely sure she was aware it was dating or a possible relationship on the second go around? Sounds more like it was very casual. I think you'd be best to just move on. Link to post Share on other sites
mystikmind2005 Posted December 1, 2015 Share Posted December 1, 2015 You went from kissing to no kissing?? Wow..... don't be fooled by circumstance pretending you did not have the opportunity, when things go backwards like that you can be absolutely sure its over, full stop. Link to post Share on other sites
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