Kevin De Smet Posted November 26, 2015 Share Posted November 26, 2015 I was wondering if people are interested in scientific methods toward dating, I know I would be. To me it makes no sense not to, even. A few ideas I have already are facial profiling: as many couples tend to look amazingly alike just imagine you had a database of thousands of faces all taken with neutral backdrops, neutral lighting, no makeup, no glasses, etc... Another idea would lean more towards dna and blood analysis to root out combinatorial diseases. If you know either of you yield a high chance of producing a child with a certain disease then maybe that partner isn't quite right for you? Also cultural factors could be interesting, maybe an Italian guy would be best with an Hungarian girl? It's just an example! But to put this into statistically valid enough profiles could prove interesting as a starting point. Another possibility is psychometric assessment test like Myer-Briggs, based more on empirical experience than true science it could be an interesting angle. Lastly I believe brain fMRI scans have the most promise as it has the granularity to produce real scientifically valid results. Anyway are there like Facebook groups or just people interested in this concept of scientific methods for dating? I'm aware it won't be a silver bullet but it should get a lot closer than gut feelings in a bar or nightclub somewhere... Link to post Share on other sites
BrocasHelm Posted November 26, 2015 Share Posted November 26, 2015 Scientific dating, wtf? Scuse me sir, but the way you describe sounds like 1930s eugenist stuff... Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted November 26, 2015 Share Posted November 26, 2015 I would be I interested in one of those pheromone texts where people smell someone's scent on a t-shirt and rate the scent as attractive or not. Scent is something that is essential in attraction for me. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Kevin De Smet Posted November 26, 2015 Author Share Posted November 26, 2015 Scientific dating, wtf? Scuse me sir, but the way you describe sounds like 1930s eugenist stuff... Can see where you'd get that from. I am not in the belief in some people being inherently better than others or more "pure" or anything like that. I do believe we tend to satisfice going for any relationship that happens to pass us by first, statistically and scientifically highly unlikely to have been the best matching option in the long-term. Link to post Share on other sites
BrocasHelm Posted November 26, 2015 Share Posted November 26, 2015 Well, what you said about DNA and blood analysis, and cultural matching, that seemed a bit disturbing to me... Apart from that, I don't really believe in the concept of scientific dating, as it takes away the human factor from it. And if there's one thing where the human factor prevails above all, it's interpersonal relationships. Sure it's not always logical, it's sometimes messy, but in the end that's what makes it human. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Kevin De Smet Posted November 27, 2015 Author Share Posted November 27, 2015 What if every doctor just did what he thought was best? What if every mechanic repaired the way he seemed to "like it"? It would be chaos wouldn't it. That's what dating is today. We need to use not just the knowledge we as individuals collect about relationships and dating through our own experience, a few magazine articles and our close friends. We need to use the world's knowledge. And the language of the world's knowledge in every field--is science. I like the pheromone idea. I have seen it before. Yes. Add it to the list! Link to post Share on other sites
frogs88 Posted November 27, 2015 Share Posted November 27, 2015 If anything I find your approach to broad. Narrow it down, focus on a specific aspect of dating, rule out more variables. Additionally a lot of the things you mention aren't exactly new and probably covered multiple times in social sciences research papers. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Kevin De Smet Posted November 27, 2015 Author Share Posted November 27, 2015 A lot of the things you mention aren't exactly new. That's precisely my problem frogs, if I can come up with these ideas...a monkey could have come up with them. What I am looking for is not some experiment done in a lab or covered in a scientific journal, or thesis paper. I am looking for something that is mainstream and widely practised by groups of people but I just haven't heard of it or come across it anywhere? Link to post Share on other sites
Zippy2000 Posted November 27, 2015 Share Posted November 27, 2015 "Scientific dating"? Great Scott! Psychologists and scientists have been trying to work out how to predict love or attraction over thousands of years. You will never find out scientifically who is attracted to who as eveyone has their own tastes and styles based on there own perception of what attractiveness is, enviromental factors and cultural influences. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Kevin De Smet Posted November 27, 2015 Author Share Posted November 27, 2015 You will never find out scientifically who is attracted to who as everyone has their own tastes and styles. That's funny because all of the variables you mentioned? Perfectly capturable. There is nothing stopping all of these variables to be analyzed, processed and synthesized into a knowledge base as-a-service. Think of a dating agency or perhaps a service offered by your nearest hospital or clinic. Just because something is complex with many variables does not put it outside of the realm of science, in matter of fact, it just begs for science--even more! Henry, I am straight but how does that matter? Link to post Share on other sites
frogs88 Posted November 27, 2015 Share Posted November 27, 2015 That's precisely my problem frogs, if I can come up with these ideas...a monkey could have come up with them. What I am looking for is not some experiment done in a lab or covered in a scientific journal, or thesis paper. I am looking for something that is mainstream and widely practised by groups of people but I just haven't heard of it or come across it anywhere? I suppose what you're looking for is some sort of hobbyist researchers perhaps a bit on the popular science field. The problem with science that's any good is that it's costs (a lot) of time, money and knowledge which is probably difficult to find. So there may be those are actually doing what you describe but I fear they lack the resources to produce anything substantial. If anything companies that run professional dating sites may have these kind of analysis running (not the medical ones course) but they clearly have interest in the outcome so it's never neutral. Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted November 27, 2015 Share Posted November 27, 2015 (edited) Kevin, unless scientists can devise a *method* for determining *energy* generating between two people (aka chemistry).... romantic attraction will always be one of those phenomena we will never figure out. You can't change the intricacies of the universe ....they are what they are ..and always will be. Edited November 27, 2015 by katiegrl 1 Link to post Share on other sites
littlez360 Posted November 27, 2015 Share Posted November 27, 2015 I wouldn't go as far as the OP is taking it. But there is a science to just finding a mate... From experience I get pretty much any girl I set my sights on by using Method. Understanding body language, interpreting the situation and being able to stimulate her mind... That's all a scientific process in a way. There's definitely a human connection that needs to be made, and it can't quite be explained, but in my eyes, I can use Skills and Methods to create that unexplainable spark. It's not all science, but science can be applied. Link to post Share on other sites
littlez360 Posted November 27, 2015 Share Posted November 27, 2015 Most girls naturally know how to get with a guy if they really want to. It's just logic. Same goes with Guys, accept most guys don't seem to get it naturally, but it's still just logic... Girls think they know what they want, but any guy is capable of showing them that they may want something else tonight... Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted November 27, 2015 Share Posted November 27, 2015 I wouldn't go as far as the OP is taking it. But there is a science to just finding a mate... From experience I get pretty much any girl I set my sights on by using Method. Understanding body language, interpreting the situation and being able to stimulate her mind... That's all a scientific process in a way. There's definitely a human connection that needs to be made, and it can't quite be explained, but in my eyes, I can use Skills and Methods to create that unexplainable spark. It's not all science, but science can be applied. littlez ......sounds like you have great energy that draws people in. Some people have better energy than others ....those who have crappy energy will continue to turn people off... and not know why. I believe how one feels about themselves and the energy they generate are linked. So it also sounds like you have a good healthy self-esteem too ....which draws people in, often without even having to try that hard. Link to post Share on other sites
littlez360 Posted November 27, 2015 Share Posted November 27, 2015 littlez ......sounds like you have great energy that draws people in. Some people have better energy than others ....those who have crappy energy will continue to turn people off... and not know why. I believe how one feels about themselves and the energy they generate are linked. So it also sounds like you have a good healthy self-esteem too ....which draws people in, often without even having to try that hard. The thing is, anybody is really capable of viewing themselves as "the catch" It's a huge self-esteem thing, but people have to learn that they can control that. I consider myself an attractive guy, but I never relied on my looks to get the interest of a girl. I have to convince myself im the alpha male to be the alpha male... I've helped a lot of guys with this kind of issue. "Stand out at the bar, be the social butterfly, create a parameter of space around you to make yourself more noticeable in a crowd, smile, laugh and show girls you can have a good time" it becomes a simple thing that anybody can learn. Human interaction can easily go from complex and dicey to natural yet exciting. Link to post Share on other sites
littlez360 Posted November 27, 2015 Share Posted November 27, 2015 And guys... if you're looking for a simple scientific way to land girls. Learn how to dance... I love being the only guy in the place that's actually able to lead girls on the dance floor without breaking their toes or looking like an idiot. An ex-gf and I took salsa lessons together for a couple months. I swear it was the best investment I've made in regards to my love life... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Kevin De Smet Posted November 27, 2015 Author Share Posted November 27, 2015 I do not believe in trickery, techniques or methods. My goal is to find a person who is suitable for me and to mutually enhance eachother's lives. No impression management, no games, no dancing, no flattering, no bull****! Different people like different things. And I don't like traditional axioms of dating and the going-out scene. To me it's not an expression of emotions, it is an expression of borderline lunacy. Link to post Share on other sites
littlez360 Posted November 27, 2015 Share Posted November 27, 2015 I get what you're sayin... it's not trickery though... It's a general discussion, is there Scientific method to dating? I say, yes, Science can most definitely be applied my using particular methods. You're more likely to find somebody suitable for you by trying them on for size. You don't have to lead anybody on... You just show them you can have a good time, you want to have a good time with them, and let the night go where it goes... I don't find anything wrong with it as long as you're not misleading people. Link to post Share on other sites
littlez360 Posted November 27, 2015 Share Posted November 27, 2015 And you're right, people do like different things. I like being that guy that had the balls to go sit next to the girl everybody has been gawking at. I like being the guy girls are waiting for a turn to dance with. I like knowing that I'm desirable... Maybe some guys don't like the idea of being "that guy" Link to post Share on other sites
littlez360 Posted November 27, 2015 Share Posted November 27, 2015 If the post title was "Scientific methods for relationships" then I wouldn't have typed a word. But dating... I know a thing or two about. Everybody has their perspectives. All respect for any guy that's more conservative. By all means, I don't have it ALL figured out. But I know how to land dates. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Kevin De Smet Posted November 27, 2015 Author Share Posted November 27, 2015 I hear ya. I don't think there should be a difference between dating and relationship but I meant to use the definition of relationship in my title. In a nightclub scene, girls are treated as queens. Guys need to "hunt" them down. What is wrong with that picture? It's time to end the madness, bro. Link to post Share on other sites
littlez360 Posted November 27, 2015 Share Posted November 27, 2015 That's not madness... I love that! Guys are suppose to be the hunters. Survival of the fittest. Link to post Share on other sites
littlez360 Posted November 27, 2015 Share Posted November 27, 2015 And dating and relationships have to be different. You can't expect every date to develop into a relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Kevin De Smet Posted November 27, 2015 Author Share Posted November 27, 2015 You can't expect every date to develop into a relationship. I agree with you on that. Link to post Share on other sites
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