ZA Dater Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 Probably the wrong title but what I mean is, those using OLD and other methods, how many new people do you end up going on dates with in a typical year? So far this year I have met up with one person and had one date, I am guessing that number is very low but would be interested to hear how others do. Link to post Share on other sites
chumble Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 between about 0 and 2 here, usually... Link to post Share on other sites
Rydo Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 When I'm single about 10-20 depending on how well it goes with each person. Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 When I was looking, around 20-30. I didn't really count to be honest. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ZA Dater Posted November 24, 2015 Author Share Posted November 24, 2015 20-30 people and I battle to find one a year! Clearly some people are rather good at dating and meeting people in general. Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 Yes, although it wasn't always so. I was terrible when I started. Practice makes perfect. Link to post Share on other sites
lino Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 When I was 'dating' (I hate that term!) maybe 3-12 per year and that number would only be so 'high' because the women would lose interest/hop onto what was the bigger and better deal in their eyes. Was never me ending it with few exceptions where I found out other guys/ex's were in the picture. I only ever asked out women I was interested to have a relationship with and only accepted advances from such women as well because I'm interested in relationships and not bonking around and have been this way my whole life. I never did online dating, never dated out of boredom/for attention/to use someone for my personal gain (I have a life that is interesting thanks very much) and never multi dated Serial and multi daters aren't my cup of tea to put it very kindly and it's unfortunate our society is going that way more rapidly each day. Your number of people you're dating is very low ZA dater by society's standards of today but it's nothing wrong with you just that these are the times now. Definitely do try to meet more women and more importantly IMO - try to make yourself a good core group of friends who are loyal to you and that you enjoy the company of. I honestly think you'll gain a lot more from that at this point. Link to post Share on other sites
insert_name Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 I've been on 7 first dates this year. Not really sure what you can hope to glean by arbitrary numbers, as there are a whole host of factors at play. For instance I am sure I could have been on more if I had lowered my standards. People with high numbers could be compromising heavily etc. Also its funny how geography makes a big difference in your potential. Tinder was responsible for some of my dates and I struggle to get matches locally to me. I tindered on the other side of the country (UK) and found that not only were the girls more attractive, I got way more matches and they were also really good fun to talk to and made a real effort to converse unlike the women in my local area who seem to want you to jump and dance for their amusement without putting any effort in return. It was depressing the number of dates I could have got with those better quality women if I wasn't stuck where I am. So yeah obviously 1 date a year gives you very little opportunity to meet a long term partner, but comparing your experience to others based on just a number is asking for false negatives to further entrench a negative outlook on your personal prospects. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ZA Dater Posted November 24, 2015 Author Share Posted November 24, 2015 I've been on 7 first dates this year. Not really sure what you can hope to glean by arbitrary numbers, as there are a whole host of factors at play. For instance I am sure I could have been on more if I had lowered my standards. People with high numbers could be compromising heavily etc. Also its funny how geography makes a big difference in your potential. Tinder was responsible for some of my dates and I struggle to get matches locally to me. I tindered on the other side of the country (UK) and found that not only were the girls more attractive, I got way more matches and they were also really good fun to talk to and made a real effort to converse unlike the women in my local area who seem to want you to jump and dance for their amusement without putting any effort in return. It was depressing the number of dates I could have got with those better quality women if I wasn't stuck where I am. So yeah obviously 1 date a year gives you very little opportunity to meet a long term partner, but comparing your experience to others based on just a number is asking for false negatives to further entrench a negative outlook on your personal prospects. Isn't my intention at all, just curious. Yes, I agree on Tinder, though in nearly a year I cant seem to meet anyone off there either lol! Link to post Share on other sites
salparadise Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 I went on a lot of first meetings I guess, 20-30 in a year. But I didn't count them as dates, just first meetings regardless if we had coffee, drinks or food. I was determined to be done with the short-term dating crap and wanted to find something real and lasting, so I didn't go on second dates just because a woman was not objectionable. I waited for someone I was really interested in and enthusiastic about seeing again. It turned out to be a good strategy, or so it seems at this point... or maybe it was just luck. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ZA Dater Posted November 24, 2015 Author Share Posted November 24, 2015 Your number of people you're dating is very low ZA dater by society's standards of today but it's nothing wrong with you just that these are the times now. Definitely do try to meet more women and more importantly IMO - try to make yourself a good core group of friends who are loyal to you and that you enjoy the company of. I honestly think you'll gain a lot more from that at this point. Friends to me is much like a knife, blunt on the one side, sharp on the other with nothing in between. I have about 3 friends perhaps, all at different points in their lives, 2 are married with kids, the other is like me but has a totally work centric life. For friendship to happen there needs to be a common interest or thread and I just never really find that ever. Nothing wrong with being alone but being alone I learnt represents a massive red flag with the odd, very rare person I do take an interest in. I have noticed with time, getting dates is becoming harder and harder. When a friend tells you to go after people he himself wouldn't give the time of day to, one just feels quite bad about being who one is. Guess today is just one of those down days where I just wish I had someone to talk to. Link to post Share on other sites
Rydo Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 With OLD it's fairly easy to get dates these days unless you live miles away from everything. Out of 20 people I would say 15 went as far as third dates and I slept with but only 1 became my gf. More people you meet the more chance of finding one that works for you. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 Before the internet 6 to 10. Asked out 50 times lol. Link to post Share on other sites
Michelle ma Belle Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 The first two years I started dating again after being married for 20 years, I dated A LOT! I honestly don't recall how many because I never thought to count but I got a TON of attention and having access to OLD, I felt like a kid in a candy shop. Needless to say, I had a lot of fun at the time but eventually it became exhausting. So much of my free time was spent on dating which took away time from my family and friends. I kind of lost my balance for a while. Eventually I learned my lesson and have become quite discerning about who I date and how much time I spend actively pursuing it. My time is precious and I no longer see the value in dating just for the sake of dating especially when it comes to OLD. There days, I much prefer dating organically. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
candie13 Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 meet ups - loads, over 20 per year. But dates dates - as in seeing a person more than three times - lower. Like really low. Maybe three per year - top. Link to post Share on other sites
Jejangles Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 I don't keep track of the number of first meets I go on - if I had to guess, I would say between 15 and 30 in the last year? It depends whether I am being active online. I'm pretty open to meeting with someone once to see if there's any interest. I try not to prescreen too much - almost all of those I dated for any length of time did not particularly stand out to me based on their online profile. It was only at that first meet where I knew there was some real potential. Only a few go anywhere after that first meet or date. I would say I went on second dates with 5 or 6 of them and 3 or more dates with 3 of them. I am currently still dating 1 of the 30, very early days, we'll see what happens. Link to post Share on other sites
bastus Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 <p>this year i date 4 women ,,well it is better than 2014 , i had Zero date lol</p> Link to post Share on other sites
central Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 When I was using OLD, I met about 50 women over an 18 month period, after careful screening. I dated about of dozen of those for various periods of time, but only a few were really a good enough match to consider long-term. Link to post Share on other sites
Xiomn Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 I'm 20 and only just had my first date with someone ever about 2 months ago. Turns out she was in the exact same position. I did have a 10 month relationship prior to that when I was 19 but we never really dated before we got together so I don't count it as such. Link to post Share on other sites
acrosstheuniverse Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 Never been single longer than a few months but in those months I would easily date one, sometimes two new guys per week. So, factoring in the occasional period of being too busy or just losing interest in dating and enjoying being single, over an average year I'd say around forty to fifty men? Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 I went on gazillions of first dates. Probably 50 per year. Link to post Share on other sites
Myragal Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 (edited) When single, perhaps 2 a week. One may be an actual 'date'. The other just a casual lunch. I've never been unattached for more than a couple months at a time so maybe 8 or so guys over that time. Meet most through dance class or Meet Up. Once I meet 'the guy', then no more dating. Might have only spoke to him once but no interest in other men. I start to leave clues for him to turn on the charm. Edited November 24, 2015 by Myragal Link to post Share on other sites
RedRobin Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 Doing OLD, I could probably have 50 dates a year... I screen hard and only agree to meet men I think I could have a relationship with. Most of those dates end up in a relationship of at least 6 months to a year... Which could go longer, but I am looking for a life partner... So, out of the fifty, I agree to meet maybe three, one becomes my BF, and I date him until he or I decide if we want to share our lives together... I have had a new BF just about every year since my fiancée died... Two marriage proposals. It's about 50/50 whether I meet them IRL or online. Link to post Share on other sites
SwordofFlame Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 I go on about 30 dates a year from OLD. Almost all of which don't work out after the 1st date. Some make it to about dates 2-4 though. I'm still single. It does get frustrating. That's OLD for ya... Link to post Share on other sites
oberkeat Posted November 24, 2015 Share Posted November 24, 2015 I went 8 first dates this year; not one resulted in a relationship. I'd give back every one of those dates for one long term relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
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