summerlove22 Posted September 26, 2015 Share Posted September 26, 2015 A guy I like who I've been chatting to for a few months, gave me his number and suggested we go for drinks one day. So I text him and asked him to let me know when he was free for drinks. But then he gave a really vague response. I didn't chase him up as I didn't want to come across as desperate but its been a couple of weeks now and haven't heard from him. Yet when I see him in person he is still friendly and chatty with me. Did I put him off by asking him out? But then isn't that why he gave me his number? Is it a bad idea to ask guys out, should us ladies let men lead? I'm really confused, as the vibes he was giving me seemed like he liked me. But now it seems, he's put off?? But then when he speaks to me in person he is still friendly, surely if he was not interested and didn't want to lead me on he would back off? Thoughts? Link to post Share on other sites
EricaH329 Posted September 26, 2015 Share Posted September 26, 2015 Do whatever you feel is right. I'm in a similar situation, but the guy asked me to hang out and hasn't followed up since. I think at this point, if he wanted to hang out with you bad enough, he would have set something up. Every situation is different in regards to what men like and don't like. Some may find it 'needy' or 'clingy' if a girl follows up with a guy, while others prefer it. That's why I always do what makes me feel right. After all, you want a guy to like you for who you are, and not what you want them to think. Right? Link to post Share on other sites
MzLady Posted September 26, 2015 Share Posted September 26, 2015 You didn't do anything wrong.. it's freaking 2015. I know women that ask guys out all the time.. and it's not a big deal. They're the one's who usually get the guy because they weren't afraid to make the first move. But because he acted vague and he's still smiling in your face and not actually bringing up the whole drinks thing, I would say he probably has a gf, or someone he is already seeing, and doesn't want to cross the line and actually go out with you. He was probably hoping for a "do you want to come over and watch a movie" text. I'd just let it be at this point. You let him know you were interested, and he's not responding to it, but still being friendly. He's letting you know that's all he wants at this time. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author summerlove22 Posted September 26, 2015 Author Share Posted September 26, 2015 Should I continue to be friendly when I see him? Or ignore him/act civil as he did after all lead me on? Link to post Share on other sites
EricaH329 Posted September 26, 2015 Share Posted September 26, 2015 Should I continue to be friendly when I see him? Or ignore him/act civil as he did after all lead me on? I would be friendly. It doesn't seem like he did anything horrible. Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted September 26, 2015 Share Posted September 26, 2015 Should I continue to be friendly when I see him? Or ignore him/act civil as he did after all lead me on? How did he lead you on? Did I miss something? I'm confused. Link to post Share on other sites
Revan32 Posted September 26, 2015 Share Posted September 26, 2015 You should probably pass on this one. If the guy is brave enough to get your number then there's no reason why he wouldn't be brave enough to ask you out. So its probably not him being nervous about you thats behind this. It sounds like you're probably not really his type. Maybe he was feeling lonely that one day, or maybe just horny. Either way it sounds like when he's not that excited about you now. I'm going through something very similar to this myself. This chick I run into every few weeks really likes me. Texts me stuff saying how cool she thinks I am, how we should hook up, stuff like that. The problem is she isn't my type, so I pretty much only ever text her back when I'm feeling extra randy. Its not a good place to be for a girl and I wouldn't recommend it to anyone. Link to post Share on other sites
MzLady Posted September 26, 2015 Share Posted September 26, 2015 If you fell like he gave you mixed signals or it's hard for you to just be his friend, then you should distance your self from him until you can be around him without having those feelings. Smile and be nice if he comes to you to chat or if you see him around. But don't initiate any contact with him, don't stop and talk to him. Just smile, say hi and go about your day. There's no need to burn bridges. Link to post Share on other sites
BronzeAgeJaeger217 Posted September 27, 2015 Share Posted September 27, 2015 You didn't do anything wrong.. it's freaking 2015. I know women that ask guys out all the time.. and it's not a big deal. They're the one's who usually get the guy because they weren't afraid to make the first move. But because he acted vague and he's still smiling in your face and not actually bringing up the whole drinks thing, I would say he probably has a gf, or someone he is already seeing, and doesn't want to cross the line and actually go out with you. He was probably hoping for a "do you want to come over and watch a movie" text. I'd just let it be at this point. You let him know you were interested, and he's not responding to it, but still being friendly. He's letting you know that's all he wants at this time. Do these women have any success? Link to post Share on other sites
Zippy2000 Posted September 27, 2015 Share Posted September 27, 2015 He just sees you as a friend. Its happened to me where a girl asked me out but I didnt feel it but Im not a guy to reject someone and not speak to them. I d still be friendly but no go through with a date as Im not feeling it and dont want to hurt your feelings. Thats all. Link to post Share on other sites
poofitsgone Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 It sounds like hes not interested in dating you. Maybe he likes you as a friend and saw that it was going in a direction he wasnt interested in. I see nothing wrong with a girl asking a guy out. Honestly, if I heard a man say he wasn't interested in a woman because she was the one to ask him out I think I would probably think less of him. I don't know if many other guys agree with me though 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts