HansonGirl Posted August 30, 2015 Share Posted August 30, 2015 I went out with this guy, and we have texted back and forth. One day this week he texted me and it was about 8pm and he finally said he was so hungry and he really needs to get something for dinner. Well i was not available to meet with him anyways, but was that supposed to be a hint for me to ask him if he wants to get food. If so, it seemed kinda lame. like why didnt he just straight up ask me if I wanted to grab dinner? well i hadn't heard from him since that conversation. Did I screw it up? PS, If he's not talking to me because i wasn't available and didn't pick up on the cue to ask him to dinner, then screw him! Link to post Share on other sites
Ami1uwant Posted August 30, 2015 Share Posted August 30, 2015 I wouldn't read it like he was hoping to get dinner with you that night if he dud shy didn't he just say... Hey I'm starving, I need to get something to eat, want to meet me at xcx?? Link to post Share on other sites
Versacehottie Posted August 30, 2015 Share Posted August 30, 2015 I wouldn't read too much into his comment. I think he was just saying that to wrap up the conversation and get off the phone. If this amount of time after that convo is longer than it usually goes between you two without speaking or texting, that seems like he's fading but I don't think it's just down to that dinner comment. Link to post Share on other sites
madjac74 Posted August 30, 2015 Share Posted August 30, 2015 It was his way of asking you without ACTUALLY asking you! It is how people date these days with all the indirect communication Link to post Share on other sites
Siquijor Posted August 30, 2015 Share Posted August 30, 2015 Well i was not available to meet with him anyways, but was that supposed to be a hint for me to ask him if he wants to get food. If so, it seemed kinda lame. like why didnt he just straight up ask me if I wanted to grab dinner? A female moaning about a guy not being 'straight up'. The irony! Link to post Share on other sites
Author HansonGirl Posted August 30, 2015 Author Share Posted August 30, 2015 I wouldn't read too much into his comment. I think he was just saying that to wrap up the conversation and get off the phone. If this amount of time after that convo is longer than it usually goes between you two without speaking or texting, that seems like he's fading but I don't think it's just down to that dinner comment. No we weren't on the phone. it was text messaging. He contacted me first that evening and was texting with how he was so hungry and should go get food. Link to post Share on other sites
Author HansonGirl Posted August 30, 2015 Author Share Posted August 30, 2015 It was his way of asking you without ACTUALLY asking you! It is how people date these days with all the indirect communication well if that's the case and if he's mad now that I told him i was busy, that's ridiculous. you can't ask someone (not even ask, hint) to do something at the last minute and then refuse to talk to them again because they weren't available when you expected them to meet up with you without prior notice. So i am not too upset, he sounds ridiculous (i only went on one date with him) (I texted him yesterday and he didn't respond). I was just trying to clarify what this was about. I wasn't really sure how interested I was, so I'm cool with it. Link to post Share on other sites
Survivor12 Posted August 30, 2015 Share Posted August 30, 2015 Why do you assume that he is angry? He could just as easily have been disappointed that you didn't take the opportunity to offer to join him. As for why he didn't just ask, maybe he didn't want to set himself up to be rejected or perhaps he just wasn't comfortable asking you at the last minute since you have only just begun dating. How did you respond? Link to post Share on other sites
Versacehottie Posted August 30, 2015 Share Posted August 30, 2015 No we weren't on the phone. it was text messaging. He contacted me first that evening and was texting with how he was so hungry and should go get food. Either way. I think it was just his "sign-off". Link to post Share on other sites
LookAtThisPOst Posted August 30, 2015 Share Posted August 30, 2015 It was his way of asking you without ACTUALLY asking you! It is how people date these days with all the indirect communication Exactly, they ask it in a way where they just "slip it in there." "Hey, I'm on the way to the so-and-so restaurant, mind grabbing a bite with me?" Usually "grabbing a bite" is a casual phrase thrown out there by men as opposed to, "Care to join me for dinner tonight?" Or, "Care to 'swing by' the so-and-so place for a 'bite'?" Those particular buzzwords make it quite casual and that way the woman feels less threatened by their approach to joining him. Link to post Share on other sites
LookAtThisPOst Posted August 30, 2015 Share Posted August 30, 2015 well if that's the case and if he's mad now that I told him i was busy, that's ridiculous. you can't ask someone (not even ask, hint) to do something at the last minute and then refuse to talk to them again because they weren't available when you expected them to meet up with you without prior notice. So i am not too upset, he sounds ridiculous (i only went on one date with him) (I texted him yesterday and he didn't respond). I was just trying to clarify what this was about. I wasn't really sure how interested I was, so I'm cool with it. Let me ask you this, when you asked you about going to dinner, and you weren't available at the time, did you come back with a time when you would be available for dinner? Usually this is an indicator of YOUR interest in seeing him again. If you didn't offer suggestions for another time, then you weren't interested. Link to post Share on other sites
Lois_Griffin Posted August 30, 2015 Share Posted August 30, 2015 I went out with this guy, and we have texted back and forth. One day this week he texted me and it was about 8pm and he finally said he was so hungry and he really needs to get something for dinner. Well i was not available to meet with him anyways, but was that supposed to be a hint for me to ask him if he wants to get food. If it was a hint, it's about the LAMEST one there is. I didn't see that as him throwing the ball into your court at all. It just sounds like he was trying to bring the text conversation to an end so he could go and get himself something to eat. I've told people that in the past when I was talking on the phone with them, that I was hungry and had to go get some dinner. It wasn't a veiled hint or anything of the sort. Just a way to put down the phone so I could go eat in peace. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author HansonGirl Posted August 30, 2015 Author Share Posted August 30, 2015 Why do you assume that he is angry? He could just as easily have been disappointed that you didn't take the opportunity to offer to join him. As for why he didn't just ask, maybe he didn't want to set himself up to be rejected or perhaps he just wasn't comfortable asking you at the last minute since you have only just begun dating. How did you respond? the reason I am assuming he is angry is because I texted him yesterday and he ignored it. I guess as somebody else suggested, I should have responded with a suggestion for another time. but really I don't like that I need to be asking him. And i still disagree that this was a way of signing off - considering he texted me out of the blue JUST to tell me this. it's not like this was the end of a conversation Link to post Share on other sites
Versacehottie Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 the reason I am assuming he is angry is because I texted him yesterday and he ignored it. I guess as somebody else suggested, I should have responded with a suggestion for another time. but really I don't like that I need to be asking him. And i still disagree that this was a way of signing off - considering he texted me out of the blue JUST to tell me this. it's not like this was the end of a conversation Dude, if he is that touchy, you don't need to sign up for that drama. He can't be a little wimp and not ask fully and clearly and then get p*ssed at you about it. Oh, I didn't realize he texted you OUT OF THE BLUE to say this and only this. Yeah, maybe he did mean to go to eat together. Sounds immature then with a chip on his shoulder. If he can't get over this, you don't want to be with him anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 Let me ask you this, when you asked you about going to dinner, and you weren't available at the time, did you come back with a time when you would be available for dinner? Usually this is an indicator of YOUR interest in seeing him again. If you didn't offer suggestions for another time, then you weren't interested. He didn't ask her about going to dinner, he announced he was hungry and needed to get something to eat. Presumably alone. In no way was that him asking the OP to join him for dinner. If he wanted her to join him, he would have said "I'm gonna go grab a bite to eat, care to join me"? She did not tell HIM she was not available, she told US she was not available. He never asked her out, so the fact she was unavailable was of no concern or relevance to him. He was simply hungry and needed to stop texting so he could go get something to eat. Or maybe he just said that as a way to sign off from texting. But in no way was it an invite to join him...and if it was it was totally lame! And he needs to step up his game! But I don't think it was, just a sign off. Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 (edited) I went out with this guy, and we have texted back and forth. ***One day this week he texted me and it was about 8pm and he finally said he was so hungry and he really needs to get something for dinner. **** Well i was not available to meet with him anyways, but was that supposed to be a hint for me to ask him if he wants to get food. If so, it seemed kinda lame. like why didnt he just straight up ask me if I wanted to grab dinner? well i hadn't heard from him since that conversation. Did I screw it up? PS, If he's not talking to me because i wasn't available and didn't pick up on the cue to ask him to dinner, then screw him! OP, read the quote above in asterisk. You said he texted you, and then he "finally" said he was so hungry *he* needed to get something to eat. He finally said? That sounds like you had been texting awhile ...and he needed to sign off to get something to eat. How is this an invite for you to join him? Where do you get that? The reason he is ignoring you now is not because he's *mad* you were busy. He does not even know you were busy, because he never invited you to dinner in the first place. So how would he even know you could not join him because you were busy? Makes absolutely no sense. The likely reason he is ignoring you now is because he lost interest. Sorry. Edited August 31, 2015 by katiegrl Link to post Share on other sites
Strahatmak Posted August 31, 2015 Share Posted August 31, 2015 OVERTHINK. If he's not asking straight up, then it's not your fault for not answering his "needs". He can ignore your text for a dozen reasons. Link to post Share on other sites
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