Talking on the phone

[macmillerpwnz]

So my friend posted on Facebook and tagged me in it. I noticed a girl had liked the post who was a friend of my friend on facebook. A few days later she likes my photos, so I like her photos back. A few days later she messages me on Facebook. We spoke on Facebook that whole week. The beginning of next week she told me to text her, we text' back and forth for 2 days. Now since last Tuesday (4 days ago), we have spoke on the phone for a total of 13 1/2 hours!!

 

Tomorrow we are going out on our first date. I wonder does this even mean anything the fact we can talk on the phone this long?

[acrosstheuniverse]

It's a pretty good sign, because it shows you have things to talk about. Some people I couldn't even last twenty minutes on the phone there was so little to talk about.

 

But it doesn't mean it'll translate into real life chemistry and attraction, not at all. It's all pretty meaningless until you've actually met in person, before then just treat it as a fun distraction.

 

And cut down the calls! Calling is nice sometimes, when in a relationship or just to touch base before you meet, but you're running the risk here of appearing or getting WAY too invested in someone you haven't met, which can be very offputting. And you're using up all of your conversation that you could be having face to face. Have a little mystery. Be a bit busy now and then. If a guy had three hours a day to speak to a girl he'd never met on the phone I'd think he had a pretty empty life.

[d0nnivain]

Texting is not talking on the phone. Do you mean that you had an additional 13.5 hours of voice communication?

 

 

Regardless, it's a positive thing that you can carry on extended conversations but it doesn't mean anything. Some people are just chatty.

[fitnessfan365]

It's all pretty meaningless until you've actually met in person. And cut down the calls! Calling is nice sometimes, when in a relationship or just to touch base before you meet, but you're running the risk here of appearing or getting WAY too invested in someone you haven't met, which can be very offputting. And you're using up all of your conversation that you could be having face to face. Have a little mystery. Be a bit busy now and then. If a guy had three hours a day to speak to a girl he'd never met on the phone I'd think he had a pretty empty life.

 

FANTASTIC post. Could not agree more.

 

1) The real her is in person - Once you meet, you're back at square one getting to know her actual personality. That's why you want to invest as little time as possible talking before hand. It has no bearing on how you'll really get along.

 

2) Your expectations get too high - Let's say there's a movie you want to see. So you go online to find out as much as possible. Then you watch the trailer over and over. After all the buzz, your imagination creates an ideal version of what you expect. So what happens? The movie is ultimately a let down. The lower your expectations, the more you get to know and appreciate the actual version.

 

3) Challenge fuels attraction - It's human nature to appreciate what's harder to obtain. If you were to base your investment on who she actually is as a person slowly over time, it makes you something she has to work for. So her attraction grows more and more. But when you act this invested w-a woman you've never even met, it communicates that you're desperate. Also acrosstheuniverse makes a GREAT point. What does it say about your life in general when you can waste that much time on the phone on a daily basis?

[macmillerpwnz]

Well she has a kid full time and never gets to do anything. The ratio of her texting is 1:1 and we text all day and night everyday. I don't call her every night some nights she will actually ask to call me.

 

she's really engaged into me and asks questions. She doesn't just respond to mine or anything. If we don't text for a bit she will text me and ask me what I'm doing.

[HereNorThere]

The problem is that you may have already generated a fantasy that you can't live up to. All of that isn't going to mean anything once you meet, I promise. It can definitely work against you.

 

My advice is to immediately start where you left off I'm your electronic communications, but don't expect a connection right off the bat. Keep it friendly, not romantic and take the pressure off her. In all reality, you're actually starting over the second you actually meet.

[macmillerpwnz]

So everything turned out bad ass she told me she likes me a lot and it felt like we were in a relationship already like we just both liked each other A LOT. We were really close the whole time, kissing, holding hands, playing with her hair, all that stuff. Was a great night - She said this was the best date she has ever been on.