Jump to content

distinction between dating and relationships


kendahke

Recommended Posts

What, in your opinion, is the difference between dating and being in a relationship?

 

Apparently, there is a line of thought that says they are the same thing. I happen to disagree, but was told I assume that my interpretation is right when it's not. So, I put it to you, dear reader: is there a distinction and what is it?

 

For my part: dating is just that--meeting and getting to know someone; no duty, obligations or expectations needing to be met. Relationships, IME, involve commitment and/or exclusivity; involves sex and the intention of not sleeping around. FWB's rarely begin from day one of meeting a person--that gets agreed upon after knowing them more than a couple of hours.

 

Thanks!

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

One thing I always found interesting / funny about Americans, is that they use phrases like: "We have been dating for 2 years now." And then I'm like: So you have been seeing each other for 2 years and you still have not asked the other one to be in a relationship? Or is dating the relationship?

 

Here in Holland we skip the whole "we are dating" status. It's not like we don't date before we start a relationship, it's just that it seems that Americans label the whole dating stage.

Link to post
Share on other sites

To me, dating is going out with people to share experiences and spend time with one another getting to know one another to determine if there is ONE who is worth my devoted time and energy to exclusively date, while we decide if we have the stuff to create a relationship in which we work together to see if we can be with one another to share living quarters with or without the possibility of marriage.

 

I don't "date" online; I don't get exclusive at a first-meet; I don't get in a relationship after 3 or 4 dates. I may decide to get exclusive that soon...and I may or may not have sex with someone I'm [simply] dating.

 

If a man I'm dating has a problem with that, then I guess there'll be no exclusivity in our future, huh?

 

 

And, for the life of me, I don't understand why Mr. Merriam and Mr. Webster gave us so many different words with so many different meanings, if each of the terms is one-and-the-same.

 

 

But, hey...that's just me. :o

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
What, in your opinion, is the difference between dating and being in a relationship?

 

Apparently, there is a line of thought that says they are the same thing. I happen to disagree, but was told I assume that my interpretation is right when it's not. So, I put it to you, dear reader: is there a distinction and what is it?

 

For my part: dating is just that--meeting and getting to know someone; no duty, obligations or expectations needing to be met. Relationships, IME, involve commitment and/or exclusivity; involves sex and the intention of not sleeping around. FWB's rarely begin from day one of meeting a person--that gets agreed upon after knowing them more than a couple of hours.

 

Thanks!

 

Dating is the period between meeting someone and the point of the "first level" of commitment -- exclusivity. If you date in stages, there are definition points. If you don't date in stages, then you feel like you're in limbo all the time. Feeling the need to declare, define, etc. Some people go through an entire dating scenario "thinking" they are boyfriend and girlfriend only to find out that the other isn't there. There needs to be periodic check ins. People are afraid to have open discussions about things and just string themselves along sometimes.

 

And, the period between meeting someone, going through the stages, and before engagement, at least, for all relationships is kinda FWB. You're really good friends at least and having sex usually even if you're boyfriend and girlfriend to the point of engagement/marriage.

 

If you're dating for an FWB, well, that's a crapshoot really. An FWB is not a "relationship". It's a stage at least after dating someone for a bit. You shouldn't be connecting on a deep enough level in that situation to call it a relationship. There isn't a close bond or shouldn't be. A relationship constitutes an emotional bond and mutual sharing of their lives on a deeper level beyond just having sex.

 

You just have to communicate with a dating partner. When that isn't happening effectively, you live in the gray area all the time.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Shining One
For my part: dating is just that--meeting and getting to know someone; no duty, obligations or expectations needing to be met. Relationships, IME, involve commitment and/or exclusivity; involves sex and the intention of not sleeping around.
This is my view as well, with the exception of sex. I see sex as part of the dating phase and a prerequisite to a relationship.
  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

IMO, dating is auditioning for a relationship. Once you're in the relationship, dating is one of the things you do to maintain the romance.

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
What, in your opinion, is the difference between dating and being in a relationship?

 

Apparently, there is a line of thought that says they are the same thing. I happen to disagree, but was told I assume that my interpretation is right when it's not. So, I put it to you, dear reader: is there a distinction and what is it?

 

For my part: dating is just that--meeting and getting to know someone; no duty, obligations or expectations needing to be met. Relationships, IME, involve commitment and/or exclusivity; involves sex and the intention of not sleeping around. FWB's rarely begin from day one of meeting a person--that gets agreed upon after knowing them more than a couple of hours.

 

Thanks!

 

The fact that relationships generally have to be formalized to some degree (the "we're official" talk) necessarily indicates that they're a separate entity from dating. I suppose you could get to a formalized relationship thru some other means than dating, so dating's not always a precursor, but dating also doesn't always result in formal relationships, and formal relationships rarely just start spontaneously or immediately. So yeah, different things pretty obvs IMO.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
IMO, dating is auditioning for a relationship. Once you're in the relationship, dating is one of the things you do to maintain the romance.

 

Yes, this. If you're in a relationship, you're still dating. But dating doesn't necessarily mean you're in a relationship. The relationship is the extra layer.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Everything is a relationship.

 

At the moment you interact with another person on a regular basis it's a relationship.

 

It can be a casual relationship or an exclusive relationship.

Link to post
Share on other sites
What, in your opinion, is the difference between dating and being in a relationship?

 

Apparently, there is a line of thought that says they are the same thing. I happen to disagree, but was told I assume that my interpretation is right when it's not. So, I put it to you, dear reader: is there a distinction and what is it?

 

For my part: dating is just that--meeting and getting to know someone; no duty, obligations or expectations needing to be met. Relationships, IME, involve commitment and/or exclusivity; involves sex and the intention of not sleeping around. FWB's rarely begin from day one of meeting a person--that gets agreed upon after knowing them more than a couple of hours.

 

Thanks!

 

Yeah I think that's pretty much what most think as well.

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...