WhisperingEyeLFC Posted July 29, 2015 Share Posted July 29, 2015 I met this girl about just over a month & a half ago now, I took her out on a date that went really well and we pretty much spoke to each other everyday up until about 2weeks ago when she randomly out of the blue just stopped talking to me. The night before she randomly stopped talking to me, we basically had a really good, long conversation over the phone about loads of stuff. She was saying how she couldn't wait to see me again etc. Because of my job I'm traveling around different parts of the west coast every week so it's difficult to see her unless when I'm back in California. I had to cancel our 2nd date because I got moved to Utah for 2 weeks so it was hard to gain momentum by dating every week. I literally don't have a clue why she randomly cut me off the way she did, I can't think of anything I said that I didn't say before that would of changed her mind about me and the fact that the last time we spoke it was for so long and she still seemed really interested just confuses & annoys me even more. I rang her twice the day after but was sent to voicemail both times then I texted her that weekend to let her know I'm back in Cali for 3 weeks but I've heard nothing back so I gave up on it & called it a loss. However I'm going back home to England after next week so I'm not sure if it's worth giving her one last text or maybe a call to try meet her up again before I go back home? Also this is aimed at men & women... Why do you think people randomly cut each other off so unexpectedly when dating? I can understand if someone else has come along or you just lose general interest, but why don't they just be straight with the person and tell them. I'm unsure wether it's sparing someone's feelings by randomly cutting them off. Thanks for reading, will be good to get some feedback! Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted July 29, 2015 Share Posted July 29, 2015 Like she's going to tell you she had a date, and it turned out to be someone she rather be with......She, like a lot of people hate breaking the bad news and be faced with a barrage of questions as to why. No one likes to have to explain themselves or lie. Link to post Share on other sites
Author WhisperingEyeLFC Posted July 29, 2015 Author Share Posted July 29, 2015 Yep that's True Link to post Share on other sites
scooby-philly Posted July 31, 2015 Share Posted July 31, 2015 Basic, straight to the point - something happened. And you'll never know what. Maybe she had or met someone else. Maybe she couldn't take you being out of state so much. Maybe she just realized she wasn't that into you or she can't commit right now. I agree - people aren't really good at tackling the hard stuff and letting someone down is one of the hardest things out there. Go out and do somethings to make you happy and realize it's not anything you did. Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted July 31, 2015 Share Posted July 31, 2015 I met this girl about just over a month & a half ago now, I took her out on a date that went really well and we pretty much spoke to each other everyday up until about 2weeks ago when she randomly out of the blue just stopped talking to me. The night before she randomly stopped talking to me, we basically had a really good, long conversation over the phone about loads of stuff. She was saying how she couldn't wait to see me again etc. Because of my job I'm traveling around different parts of the west coast every week so it's difficult to see her unless when I'm back in California. I had to cancel our 2nd date because I got moved to Utah for 2 weeks so it was hard to gain momentum by dating every week. I literally don't have a clue why she randomly cut me off the way she did, I can't think of anything I said that I didn't say before that would of changed her mind about me and the fact that the last time we spoke it was for so long and she still seemed really interested just confuses & annoys me even more. I rang her twice the day after but was sent to voicemail both times then I texted her that weekend to let her know I'm back in Cali for 3 weeks but I've heard nothing back so I gave up on it & called it a loss. However I'm going back home to England after next week so I'm not sure if it's worth giving her one last text or maybe a call to try meet her up again before I go back home? Also this is aimed at men & women... Why do you think people randomly cut each other off so unexpectedly when dating? I can understand if someone else has come along or you just lose general interest, but why don't they just be straight with the person and tell them. I'm unsure wether it's sparing someone's feelings by randomly cutting them off. Thanks for reading, will be good to get some feedback! Because it's easier for THEM to not have to face and deal with the truth and be honest with another person. They are weak and insecure. This is who they are. You found out early. Be happy about that. This ends without drama essentially, unless you make it so yourself . . . Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted July 31, 2015 Share Posted July 31, 2015 Sorry about this happening to you. I am a woman and I have it done to me all the time. I wish they disappeared after only 1 date that way I didn't have time to get into them. In my case they drop off the face of the earth after 3-4 dates. POOF, gone. No explanation, not a word, just gone. It sucks. Link to post Share on other sites
Toodaloo Posted July 31, 2015 Share Posted July 31, 2015 I can't really add anything that the others have not already said other than... If your coming back to the UK hurry up before you miss the sunshine! Chin up chook. People are strange creatures. Sometimes its better to just let them go off and do their own thing. Rocketman did this to me. God alone knows why... I gave up on him. Link to post Share on other sites
AlurOne Posted July 31, 2015 Share Posted July 31, 2015 I feel for you. There is a reason and you'll likely never know. Most likely nothing you did wrong. But if you really liked her, it's hard to stop trying to answer the riddle. Link to post Share on other sites
jen1447 Posted July 31, 2015 Share Posted July 31, 2015 I rang her twice the day after but was sent to voicemail both times then I texted her that weekend to let her know I'm back in Cali for 3 weeks but I've heard nothing back so I gave up on it & called it a loss. However I'm going back home to England after next week so I'm not sure if it's worth giving her one last text or maybe a call to try meet her up again before I go back home? If I were you I'd text her once more (without really expecting a reply but for your own peace of mind, just to be heard) that you have literally no idea why she stopped talking to you and leave it at that. At least that way she'll have to carry around some specified guilt for being a soulless, heartless c*nt. (Giving you some sort of "hey I don't wait to hear from you anymore" sendoff would be the bare minimum of what she should do, and giving you less than the bare minimum does indeed qualify her as a failure as a human being. Unless there's sth you're not telling us here.) 1 Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted July 31, 2015 Share Posted July 31, 2015 Last guy I dated abruptly ended things in April. My last text from him was that he "promise I will call". It's August and I'm still waiting on that call. He unfriended me on Facebook, too. Didn't find that out until a couple of days of not hearing from him. Who knows why they do it. I didn't bother to ask. The bottom line answer is: they don't want to be bothered anymore--otherwise, they'd contact you. Hurts like eff, but yeah, it is what it is. Link to post Share on other sites
aloneinaz Posted July 31, 2015 Share Posted July 31, 2015 Personally, I wouldn't give her the satisfaction of another text. It will only stroke her ego and she'll say "jezz dude, take a hint".. As the other posters have stated, this is very common in today's dating world. Yes, she's a spineless POS for not simply replying to your first text. All she had to say was "It was great meeting you but, I've hit it off w/another guy and want to see where it goes". Take care When I was dating a girl and I wasn't feeling it, I stopped contacting her. Sometimes, they figured it out and maybe felt the same. Other times, they'd check in and I'd tell them what I put above. When I was checking in w/someone I dated, I'd text them once or call them. If I got ignored, I took the hint.. Link to post Share on other sites
Joaquin Posted July 31, 2015 Share Posted July 31, 2015 It's because they don't want a relationship with you and don't consider the level of investment made warrants an explanation. Nor are they bothered that you think they are spineless as they don't give a siht about what you think. You are meaningless to them. Don't waste a moment more of your life on them. Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted July 31, 2015 Share Posted July 31, 2015 The absolute only times I have ever gone silent on a guy is when there were extenuating circumstances and he was very very keen on me despite those circumstances. EG. In your case my thoughts could have been 'you live in the UK - which is very long distance if I lived in the States but also when in my country you weren't 'around' either. (through no fault of your own). If I got chatting with someone and realised the distance would make it a nightmare but he was very 'I can accommodate that' and I was basically saying no to long distance then that would make me go silent - the guy isn't 'listening to me' nor is he respecting my views on it. If he is doing that already then he will always do it. This is just my experience though and I am not suggesting you did the same OP. LDR are tough even when they are several hundred miles let alone several thousand. For me, my last LDR was a couple of hundred miles and was the most suffocating relationship I have ever experienced. I should have said no right at the beginning - I did say no once but a few months later he happened to be in my area and I met him. Big mistake on my part. Link to post Share on other sites
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