Tall Guy vs Short(er) Guy

[bpm103]

I'm sure the topic is covered often in many ways but I am curious as to the perception when a woman sees a tall guy versus a short guy. What is the woman saying to herself when she sees a tall man versus when she sees a shorter man.... perhaps one that is her height, slightly taller, or slightly shorter?

 

Is there a dialog that is going through her head that is independent or related to the FEELING of attraction?

 

For example, I am wondering if a woman thinks:

 

When she sees a taller man - "He looks strong, protective, manly, like he would be in control, like he could throw me around in the bedroom"... etc etc

 

&

 

When she sees a shorter man - "He looks weaker, like he would not be able to protect me, like he would be less good in bed" ... etc etc.

 

Obviously, whether a woman thinks these things or not is not indicative of their truthfulness. I am just wondering if those thoughts proceed or accompany a feeling of attraction? Or is attraction stand alone?

 

Thanks!

[S_A]

Are you also wondering if they think the tall guy has a bigger penis? It's a fair question if you are. But there is no correlation IMO.

[bpm103]

I'm not wondering if the guy actually DOES have a bigger penis... just like I am not wondering if the taller guy IS better in bed, or if he IS more protective, or if he IS stronger...

 

Obviously being tall does not automatically mean these things.

 

I am wondering what a woman perceives... what the thoughts are that come to mind, if there are any. Or is it simply, "he's more attractive".

 

Maybe a better way to put it would be.... same guy, same face, same muscular build (proportionally)... what does the tallness imply to a woman?

[S_A]

Just about everything you mentioned is a reason (they do find the height more attractive and they do feel more protected with height). I honestly think your original post nailed it.

[bpm103]

That's kind of what I ... well not kind of, lol... that is what I expected.

 

Hopefully some women will chime in with their thoughts here. I was wondering this because I don't have the same thoughts about women when I see them.

 

For instance, if I see a fit or smaller or large breasted or hourglass figured woman I don't think ... "oh, she must be really healthy and would make a good mom and probably is great in bed".

 

And if I see a larger woman I don't consciously think... "oh she must be unhealthy or stronger than me"

 

All I feel is attraction or no attraction... or maybe if I am uncertain it's just a sense of curiosity, wanting to see or know more about her. I don't make judgments that lead to my determination of her attractiveness is my point. It's either, yes she is attractive or no I she is not (to me).

 

ha... it's so evident that I think way too much. oh well

[giggledidoo]

I was wondering this because I don't have the same thoughts about women when I see them...All I feel is attraction or no attraction... I don't make judgments that lead to my determination of her attractiveness is my point. It's either, yes she is attractive or no I she is not (to me).

 

You've answered your own question - women are very similar to men! I personally am more attracted to tall men but it's not a case of consciously thinking "Oh he's tall, that must mean I like him", your subconscious mind just makes that snap decision instantly.

 

However as I'm now thinking about it I probably would be more inclined to deduce that a short guy might be willing to put more effort into things (pursuing a girl, being better in bed etc) because they feel they need to compensate for their height. But I wouldn't use that as a universal.

[ascendotum]

All I feel is attraction or no attraction... or maybe if I am uncertain it's just a sense of curiosity, wanting to see or know more about her. I don't make judgments that lead to my determination of her attractiveness is my point. It's either, yes she is attractive or no I she is not (to me).

That is exactly the same as I feel when it comes to women. I strongly suspect that it is the same for most women to when it comes to tall men. Its inherent in their gene coding from thousands of generations and the size preference will be explained by evolutionary psychology but they don't give it rational thought when they scan the guys at a party. The protection, better lover, 'makes me feel feminine' aspects given as explanations in way justify (well especially the protection aspect in this day and age is lame imo) the preference. Whereas the tall guy dating the woman, will likely just say I thought she was pretty/sexy/cute/sweet, though some do say they feel more dominant dating a small woman. There is probably a submissive element going on as well with the women too (as you said the 'throw me around' aspect)

 

I suspect some career and $ focused women, will consciously favor tall men because of their greater management (earning) potential.

[bpm103]

Well, obviously I am on the shorter side or I probably wouldn't care about the subject. At 5'9, I am average height but perceived as being a "short" guy. Yes, I have had women refer to me a short. I shouldn't care but when I am eliminated from consideration because of it, not going to BS myself, it does suck.

 

Now, I would 100% and absolutely dispute any assumption that I posses less of any quality or charateristic that a taller man may (aside from the physical measurement of distance from head to toe). But the fact that it comes from a genetically wired sense of attraction means that it doesn't matter if I am just as much of, more of, or less of a man than another. What matters is how the woman feels.

 

That doesn't mean I am less of anything. I am the only one that gives this experience of being (picked last) "meaning" for myself. I have to determine what meaning it has for me.

 

I like to think that the fact that I have to battle through this challenge makes me more apt to not pu**y out in the future when life kicks me in the balls. Not that I will be any more or less willing to man up than a tall guy, not what I am saying. Just saying that I can be "the most interesting man in the world" even if I am 5'9.

Edited July 7, 2015 by bpm103

[DaisyBug]

Women generally do prefer tall men. Myself, I don't care - I could go out with a guy the same height as me with no problem whatsoever, and I'm short - but I'm not your average girl. Good thing I do like 'em short, cuz I love me sum Asian men!!

 

 

You asked why. OK, here's the deal. You know how they say men are more into looks than women? Well, women do care about looks, but not in the same aesthetic way a man does. A woman looks for signs of virility. That's NOT to say short men can't appear that way or that women don't like them, but very generally speaking, tall = masculine. It makes them feel protected.

[RoseVille]

I don't like feeling like a physical equal to a man that I'm in a relationship with. He must be better able to protect me than I am, and stronger than me, and able to keep an eye out (like an eagle) for possible dangers ahead, and I only feel that way when a man is larger than me - which partially means taller (and taller when I'm in heels).

 

It's not something you can rationalize or intellectually explain. I carry a handgun. I know how to fight. I could probably defend myself just fine if I had to.

 

It's just a carnal feeling, something deep down - man protects, woman nurtures.

[DaisyBug]

Well, obviously I am on the shorter side or I probably wouldn't care about the subject. At 5'9, I am average height but perceived as being a "short" guy. Yes, I have had women refer to me a short.

 

 

HUH? 5'9" is short?? No way. When I say "short," I'm thinking up to 5'7". My ex was 5'8" and I never saw him as short at all. I'm sorry to hear you're made to feel short when, in reality, you're smack-dab average in height. In fact, your height is perfect!!

 

 

There's someone I'd love to go out with who's...ohhh...maybe 5'2" at the most. I'm a bit nervous to put myself out there because we work for the same company and, if he rejected me, it'd be quite awkward... He has the world's cutest laugh.

Edited July 7, 2015 by DaisyBug

[Imported]

OP, I am only 5'11". There are guys taller than me. Plenty of them. I don't consider 90% of them to even be in the running with me. It's not just height. I'm not even talking about the goofy looking tall guys, cause there are plenty of those too. Ask them how their sex life is.

 

 

There is tall enough for most women. And then you have other hurdles to try to measure up to. Do better in all areas of your life. Some things you can't control. Some things you can.

[Auspecial]

That's kind of what I ... well not kind of, lol... that is what I expected.

 

Hopefully some women will chime in with their thoughts here. I was wondering this because I don't have the same thoughts about women when I see them.

 

For instance, if I see a fit or smaller or large breasted or hourglass figured woman I don't think ... "oh, she must be really healthy and would make a good mom and probably is great in bed".

 

And if I see a larger woman I don't consciously think... "oh she must be unhealthy or stronger than me"

 

All I feel is attraction or no attraction... or maybe if I am uncertain it's just a sense of curiosity, wanting to see or know more about her. I don't make judgments that lead to my determination of her attractiveness is my point. It's either, yes she is attractive or no I she is not (to me).

 

ha... it's so evident that I think way too much. oh well

 

I agree with this. I am attracted to the whole package (no not that one, er....) I register the statistics but I don't make assumptions.

[TunaInTheBrine]

Posts like this seriously make me laugh.

 

Do you know that Voltaire was 5'3" and notoriously ugly, but one of the most renowned ladies men in history? My God! Some of the world's greatest seducers have been short, ugly, broke, etc... One guy I know who I'd be willing to bet has gotten laid more than anyone on this forum lives with his mom, is 36 years old, is missing most of his teeth, is overweight, broke, plays video games all day, is average height, but the guy has got game. He consistently pulls tail and I would bet on him over most men who are rich, 'good looking', tall, etc... He knows how to talk to women.

 

Here's a fact that short guys are so unwilling to accept: being good looking doesn't mean that you're attractive. It might give you an advantage at first glimpse, but beyond that, there's so much more that comes into play.

 

Ladies, how many good looking men have you met who, when they opened their mouths, you stopped caring about them and wished they hadn't? And on the contrary, have you met men who, upon first glance did not necessarily rule out, but found after some good conversation and interaction that you were wet for them?

 

OP, in short (no pun intended), I agree with your initial observations about the unconscious instincts of women. But IME (and I am 5'6" by the way, and am never lost for a date), women LOVE LOVE LOVE a man who adores them and isn't afraid to show it, doesn't act all aloof and puff out his chest like these other wannabe's.

 

The men I've known who score the most with women are not the ones you'd expect by looking at them. They have something else that is not looks. Never let looks or the ubiquitous "women prefer tall men" thing ever dictate how you see yourself as a man.

 

Rant over.

Edited July 7, 2015 by TunaInTheBrine

[Versacehottie]

I'm sure the topic is covered often in many ways but I am curious as to the perception when a woman sees a tall guy versus a short guy. What is the woman saying to herself when she sees a tall man versus when she sees a shorter man.... perhaps one that is her height, slightly taller, or slightly shorter?

 

Is there a dialog that is going through her head that is independent or related to the FEELING of attraction?

 

For example, I am wondering if a woman thinks:

 

When she sees a taller man - "He looks strong, protective, manly, like he would be in control, like he could throw me around in the bedroom"... etc etc

 

&

 

When she sees a shorter man - "He looks weaker, like he would not be able to protect me, like he would be less good in bed" ... etc etc.

 

Obviously, whether a woman thinks these things or not is not indicative of their truthfulness. I am just wondering if those thoughts proceed or accompany a feeling of attraction? Or is attraction stand alone?

 

Thanks!

 

I'm going to start of saying that the main thing a shorter guy needs is a bunch of confidence and to put himself out there. Ok to answer your questions:

 

*Yes, a tall guy catches your eye at first probably easier. Probably similar to a blonde girl.

 

*Ultimately though when think about a relationship, a girl "ready" for a real relationship might start off saying that she cares or minds one way or another but when the right guy comes along, it doesn't matter so much. Arbitrary wish lists go out the window a LOT of the time. Yes, the ones with height preference on them.

 

*5'9" isn't that short. It's more like average height. Average height for women, I believe is 5'4". I have dated lots of heights. Maybe at some points I was biased with a preference for tall. But have had bf's 5'7'-6'6". Once I went to 5'7" bypassed any bias I had against shorter types, I would never let it be an issue now. 5'9" has never been a bad thing in my book. My only worry is if they have any hangups about me wearing my heels!!

 

*I think less about height and more about body type and way a guy carries himself as far as being able to protect me and so on and so forth. Most girls don't want to be "bigger" than their guys. Pick someone proportional and that is not going to be an issue, meaning fat or chunky or bigger boned. At 5'9", depending on who you choose to be attracted to, not likely to be an issue. Go for more petite, shorter girls and you should be fine, unless you like tall ones. I know enough couples where the girl is tall and willowy and guy is short, compact muscles, trim. Point is what is your preference?

 

*My one friend who is bigger boned, once dumped a great guy with "he can't throw me around in the bedroom" wording. I don't think she was that into him on the whole. He was probably overcompensating for his height with being too nice--which is probably real reason she didn't feel it for him. Her subsequent bf wasn't that tall either 5'8" maybe?

 

*I kind of think some things about physicality are telling when it comes to what I think a guy would be like in bed--but not all, his personality tells a lot too. And then some things you can never predict (pun intended). Sometimes I think when a guy is closer to you in height, it can be a really really good thing, which actually puts you in a great zone.

 

*Worrying about whether a guy can protect me or not, is so far down on the list of traits I notice, that I'm not even conscious of feeling one way or another. My experience is that a guy's personality, not his size, will tell you if he's going to go to bat for you or not and in which way.

 

*So initial attraction stand alone attraction, yes height will play a part. Same with model good looks. But that's fleeting. Most guys will need a personality and character traits and other things to back up initial attraction. And conversely, can create attraction that's lasting through things other than height.

 

We are all different though. Just go after what you want and stop stressing about height. Actually with the shorter guys that approached me, the ones who had obvious hangups about their height, that was the turn off--not the height itself. Good luck

Edited July 7, 2015 by Versacehottie

[lino]

That's kind of what I ... well not kind of, lol... that is what I expected.

 

Hopefully some women will chime in with their thoughts here. I was wondering this because I don't have the same thoughts about women when I see them.

 

For instance, if I see a fit or smaller or large breasted or hourglass figured woman I don't think ... "oh, she must be really healthy and would make a good mom and probably is great in bed".

 

And if I see a larger woman I don't consciously think... "oh she must be unhealthy or stronger than me"

 

All I feel is attraction or no attraction... or maybe if I am uncertain it's just a sense of curiosity, wanting to see or know more about her. I don't make judgments that lead to my determination of her attractiveness is my point. It's either, yes she is attractive or no I she is not (to me).

 

ha... it's so evident that I think way too much. oh well

 

Men and women think very differently on many things. This is one of them.

 

The breeding potential of a woman has never crossed my mind once nor has how good she may or may not be in bed.

 

The former can't be identified that easily and the latter can be easily fixed with hands on 'tutoring'

[JJCaliGirl]

Well, obviously I am on the shorter side or I probably wouldn't care about the subject. At 5'9, I am average height but perceived as being a "short" guy. Yes, I have had women refer to me a short. I shouldn't care but when I am eliminated from consideration because of it, not going to BS myself, it does suck.

 

Now, I would 100% and absolutely dispute any assumption that I posses less of any quality or charateristic that a taller man may (aside from the physical measurement of distance from head to toe). But the fact that it comes from a genetically wired sense of attraction means that it doesn't matter if I am just as much of, more of, or less of a man than another. What matters is how the woman feels.

 

That doesn't mean I am less of anything. I am the only one that gives this experience of being (picked last) "meaning" for myself. I have to determine what meaning it has for me.

 

I like to think that the fact that I have to battle through this challenge makes me more apt to not pu**y out in the future when life kicks me in the balls. Not that I will be any more or less willing to man up than a tall guy, not what I am saying. Just saying that I can be "the most interesting man in the world" even if I am 5'9.

 

I don't think you're short at all. I prefer men to be under 6 feet because I fit better in his arms vs someone over 6 feet.

 

As for your question, I actually see weight/muscles as being more indicative of being able to protect than height. For instance, someone who is a little more built or has a little extra seems to be more protective than a guy who is thin.

[DaisyBug]

 

The breeding potential of a woman has never crossed my mind once nor has how good she may or may not be in bed.

 

The former can't be identified that easily and the latter can be easily fixed with hands on 'tutoring'

 

I like that attitude!!!!! :D

[G0DDESS]

.

 

 

 

5'9" isn't actually "short" in a man. I am 5'9" and think men shorter than me are preferable in many ways, even.

 

Its about the way he carries himself and our chemistry together.. how we interact.

Edited July 7, 2015 by G0DDESS

[jay1983]

I'mma be honest. I've read so much of this, yet I haven't seen this tall thing play out in real life. Guys with nice faces usually have girls with pretty faces, guys with ugly faces, tall or short usually have girls with ugly faces.

 

See a tall guy with a hot girl, he's usually good looking too. I don't see no tall ugly dudes with a fine chick.

[torturedartist]

I'm sure the topic is covered often in many ways but I am curious as to the perception when a woman sees a tall guy versus a short guy. What is the woman saying to herself when she sees a tall man versus when she sees a shorter man.... perhaps one that is her height, slightly taller, or slightly shorter?

 

Is there a dialog that is going through her head that is independent or related to the FEELING of attraction?

 

For example, I am wondering if a woman thinks:

 

When she sees a taller man - "He looks strong, protective, manly, like he would be in control, like he could throw me around in the bedroom"... etc etc

 

&

 

When she sees a shorter man - "He looks weaker, like he would not be able to protect me, like he would be less good in bed" ... etc etc.

 

Obviously, whether a woman thinks these things or not is not indicative of their truthfulness. I am just wondering if those thoughts proceed or accompany a feeling of attraction? Or is attraction stand alone?

 

Thanks!

 

To understand attraction you really have to think primally.

 

Imagine the earth 50, 000 years ago, before the days of smart phones. Even before the days of regular cell phones.

 

Basic survival was the number one concern back then. And every homo sapien's genetics and resulting physical characteristics were the number one factor in determining his/her odds of surviving. It all came down to how fast you could run, or how well you could hunt woolly mammoth, or beat the **** out of other homo sapiens (or homo erectus ).

 

Also consider that our number one drive as living organisms is to ensure survival of the species.

 

To ensure survival of the species you need to breed. With whom? If you're a man, with everyone. If you're a woman, with a man who would give your offspring the best odds of survival, which would first mean that his genetic contribution would likely produce strong offspring. Second, that he'd be able to protect both you and your offspring until they reach adulthood.

 

Fast-forward to today. We're the same species of homo sapien, though the world we live in is much different. Our survival isn't dependent upon our physical (or mental) attributes. But all the same, the primal part of our brain causes us to look for characteristics in partners that would ensure the survival of our offspring, like we're living in the pre-civilization days.

 

Back in the day being tall would be an advantage for a male. So today, when a woman is thinking about sex (attraction, romance, etc.) she's naturally attracted to tall males.

 

That said, it's not height women are most attracted to. It's overall physical strengths. Generally taller men have greater physical capabilities than shorter men. But, a 5'10" guy (on the low-end of tall) who's really built, say has a big chest, big arms, and (this is really important) strong legs would appear as more attractive to a lot of women than a taller guy who isn't as built. Why? Because the shorter guy with all his muscles (and a lower center-of-gravity) would probably win a fight with a lot of taller guys for the simple fact that he's stronger.

 

And then there are factors like testosterone levels, i.e. deep voice, broad chin, facial hair.

 

And then there's confidence, which is another big one.

[guest569]

Haha, OP.. In a word, no.

[amaysngrace]

Some short guys are rockin while some tall guys are Lurch so that's what I'm trying to figure out in my head.

[jay1983]

Some short guys are rockin while some tall guys are Lurch so that's what I'm trying to figure out in my head.

 

Only thing that makes sense.

 

You know amay, I think your cool. I don't care what anybody says about you.

[amaysngrace]

Only thing that makes sense.

 

You know amay, I think your cool. I don't care what anybody says about you.

 

Thanks. And anybody named Jay is fly by me too.