girlywoman25 Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 We're 26 and we been together for 4 month before he proposed to me. I accepted because we both feel we're right for each other. Like they say when you find the "one" you'll know. I worry thought how my friends and family are going to take it since we haven't been dating for long. I need some input thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
ClickToRead Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 Do not worry about what others think. Sometimes people meet and things are just right. Go with it. Congrats. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
sagetalk Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 I think it is too soon, what is the big rush? You hardly know each other. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 I am sorry for maybe being rude. So is it a real engagement with a promise to marry within a year or it's one of those fake engagement with no wedding date? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Erised Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 Too soon. You can always get married in the future. You don't know each other 4 months in, not really. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
lemoncello Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 The only opinions that matter OP, is yours and your fiance. Do you think it's too soon? When is the wedding date? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ColdandLonelyinAK Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 One of my best friends became engaged to her now husband after only 3 months. They got married less than a month later, and within a month of that she was saying how ready she was for him to leave town for work. They were also having financial problems within a couple months of tying the knot. I feel that, had they known each other longer, they would have benefitted. She admittedly married him so soon because she was having a hard time paying her rent and he could get housing allowance if they were married. They are having all sorts of issues. Wait it out, or at least make it a lengthy engagement. You have to be past the "honeymoon phase" of your relationship before you really know someone, IMO. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author girlywoman25 Posted May 7, 2015 Author Share Posted May 7, 2015 I am sorry for maybe being rude. So is it a real engagement with a promise to marry within a year or it's one of those fake engagement with no wedding date? I'm not offended. We want to get married in November. Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 About your move in together first and see how that works for you guys? Why do you need to get married so fast? Nobody is going anywhere. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author girlywoman25 Posted May 7, 2015 Author Share Posted May 7, 2015 The only opinions that matter OP, is yours and your fiance. Do you think it's too soon? When is the wedding date? No i dont think it is too soon. We were friends before we started dating. We want to get married in November not sure the exact date Link to post Share on other sites
barcode88 Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 OK, I think everyone needs to calm down. Yes OP I think its a bit earlier than typical, I think most people would say at least 1 year. However if you've dated a LOT of Men and you feel that this one is a grand slam knocked out of the park, you could be the exception to the rule. I think the most important thing is that you need to take a step back and look at everything objectively - especially since you're probably still wearing the honeymoon glasses. Don't panic and back down right away just because we're telling you "Its Early", rather take the time of your engagement to assess how you feel. You have plenty of time to break it off if you feel a change of heart. You're not super young at 26, I know a lot of people getting married around that age, so there's a good chance it could work out. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
El Pallasso Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 (edited) All this "you know best" is nice and all. However, it is too soon and the only reason you accepted was because you didn't want to reject him. You couldn't stand to see his disappointed face. Now, you're doubting yourself and seeking the assurance of people on the internet to tell you that what you did was right. Rationalize it how you wish but deep down, you know I'm right. Edited May 7, 2015 by El Pallasso 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author girlywoman25 Posted May 7, 2015 Author Share Posted May 7, 2015 OK, I think everyone needs to calm down. Yes OP I think its a bit earlier than typical, I think most people would say at least 1 year. However if you've dated a LOT of Men and you feel that this one is a grand slam knocked out of the park, you could be the exception to the rule. I think the most important thing is that you need to take a step back and look at everything objectively - especially since you're probably still wearing the honeymoon glasses. Don't panic and back down right away just because we're telling you "Its Early", rather take the time of your engagement to assess how you feel. You have plenty of time to break it off if you feel a change of heart. You're not super young at 26, I know a lot of people getting married around that age, so there's a good chance it could work out. Yes i have dated several other men and truly feel i found the right person without a doubt i feel it Link to post Share on other sites
Author girlywoman25 Posted May 7, 2015 Author Share Posted May 7, 2015 All this "you know best" is nice and all. However, it is too soon and the only reason you accepted was because you didn't want to reject him. You couldn't stand to see his disappointed face. Now, you're doubting yourself and seeking the assurance of people on the internet to tell you that what you did was right. Rationalize it how you wish but deep down, you know I'm right. Its not i didnt want to reject him and i think im too worried what my family and friends might think but i know i shouldnt. Plus we were friends before we started dating Link to post Share on other sites
clia Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 Did he give you a ring? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 I'm not offended. We want to get married in November. Way too soon; you are still in the honeymoon phase. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 (edited) Its not i didnt want to reject him and i think im too worried what my family and friends might think but i know i shouldnt. Plus we were friends before we started dating You know it's rushing and you also know for this reason your family will object. Now explain to me why the rush to getting married? Why not just move in together for a year and see how that goes? There is a world of difference between being friends, dating and living together. I dated my ex husband for 3 years before getting married and the first year of our marriage he still felt like a stranger to me! Edited May 7, 2015 by Gaeta 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Author girlywoman25 Posted May 7, 2015 Author Share Posted May 7, 2015 Did he give you a ring? Yes he did Link to post Share on other sites
wheream_i Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 We're 26 and we been together for 4 month before he proposed to me. I accepted because we both feel we're right for each other. Like they say when you find the "one" you'll know. I worry thought how my friends and family are going to take it since we haven't been dating for long. I need some input thanks! You accepted because after 26 years of life, you finally get your day to feel like a real princess, make all your female friends jealous, plan your bachelorette party, have your big day with no real concept that marriage is supposed to be forever. That's a long time. Best of luck with the divorce. Actually, best of luck to him with the divorce. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author girlywoman25 Posted May 7, 2015 Author Share Posted May 7, 2015 You know it's rushing and you also know for this reason your family will object. Now explain to me why the rush to getting married? Why not just move in together for a year and see how that goes? There is a world of difference between being friends, dating and living together. I dated my ex husband for 3 years before getting married and the first year of our marriage he still felt like a stranger to me! I understand and see your perpective on this. I was brought up that you have to wait until you're married to move in together but i stopped believing in that Link to post Share on other sites
Author girlywoman25 Posted May 7, 2015 Author Share Posted May 7, 2015 You accepted because after 26 years of life, you finally get your day to feel like a real princess, make all your female friends jealous, plan your bachelorette party, have your big day with no real concept that marriage is supposed to be forever. That's a long time. Best of luck with the divorce. Actually, best of luck to him with the divorce. Thanks i appreciate that Link to post Share on other sites
neowulf Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 You don't need a piece of paper to be committed to each other. Don't marry him before you've known each other 2 years. 4 months is nothing. You've got a lot of water under a bridge to see before you should be making that call. There's no hurry. Please, don't rush. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author girlywoman25 Posted May 7, 2015 Author Share Posted May 7, 2015 You don't need a piece of paper to be committed to each other. Don't marry him before you've known each other 2 years. 4 months is nothing. You've got a lot of water under a bridge to see before you should be making that call. There's no hurry. Please, don't rush. Thanks. We are not going to get married right away like everyone here assumed. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 Thanks. We are not going to get married right away like everyone here assumed. Didn't you post up-thread that you plan to marry in Novembet?!?! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted May 7, 2015 Share Posted May 7, 2015 In my opinion, yes, it's far too soon. I realize you've known him for a while, but being friends and being a couple are not the same thing. I would wait. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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