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I have never been so turned off and uncomfortable on a date in my life


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I went on a second date tonight and got the biggest shock of my life. The girl shows up to the date with a CANE????? Saying she has HIP issues and it helps her walk straight. I asked her why didn't have it on the 1st meeting and she said....."she should have because she was in a lot of pain"

 

So basically I am walking around on a saturday night with a woman who is walking with a cane which was so uncomfortable for me. If she was in that much pain she should have not come out tonight because I am too young to be on a date with someone who has a cane.

 

So there will be no more dates from this point on because I am turned off completely. I could not believe she bought a cane on a 2nd date.

 

Worst date ever

Edited by smg15
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BluegrassBaldGuy

Wow dude... shallow much?

 

If the cane was the tipping point of an all-around disaster date, then fair enough. But if that's the only/main concern you have with her, then WTF is your problem? She's hurt and needs to use a cane. So be it.

 

What if you fell and broke your arm one day and had to use a cast? Would you expect a girl to be completely disgusted and turned off because she "was too young to be seen with a guy in a cast?"

 

Sorry, but this is just... weird.

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Was she not acceptable besides the fact that she had a cane?

 

It's no way I can date anyone who uses a cane especially in the summer time.

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It's no way I can date anyone who uses a cane especially in the summer time.

 

But you're ok with someone who uses a cane in the winter time?

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Wow dude... shallow much?

 

If the cane was the tipping point of an all-around disaster date, then fair enough. But if that's the only/main concern you have with her, then WTF is your problem? She's hurt and needs to use a cane. So be it.

 

What if you fell and broke your arm one day and had to use a cast? Would you expect a girl to be completely disgusted and turned off because she "was too young to be seen with a guy in a cast?"

 

Sorry, but this is just... weird.

 

Well tell me that before the date just don't show up with a cane.

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But you're ok with someone who uses a cane in the winter time?

 

I am not going to date anyone who uses a cane. I had other plans for us but cancelled them when I saw the cane. And I told her if she was in pain we could have went out another day.

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I am not going to date anyone who uses a cane. I had other plans for us but cancelled them when I saw the cane. And I told her if she was in pain we could have went out another day.

 

Were you rude to her about this? If you were then that is just heartless. It is probably something she's already self conscious about, so if you turned rude when she showed up with a cane that's just mean.

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Were you rude to her about this? If you were then that is just heartless. It is probably something she's already self conscious about, so if you turned rude when she showed up with a cane that's just mean.

 

No I was a gentleman, paid for dinner, and never mentioned it but I wanted to extend the date and go to an area near the water but I just was not in a romantic mood after seeing the cane

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Wow that is amazingly superficial. Let me know how that works out for you.

 

Yeah but I am sure if a guy showed up out of nowhere with a cane a woman would be turned off too

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I can only imagine your reaction if she had shown up in a wheelchair.

 

It seems a little superficial to flip out over the occasional use of a cane, but you're certainly entitled to your preferences.

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If that's the worst date you've ever been on, be thankful. If only I could introduce you to some of my past dates.

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I can only imagine your reaction if she had shown up in a wheelchair.

 

It seems a little superficial to flip out over the occasional use of a cane, but you're certainly entitled to your preferences.

 

Ok I get it, only women get to be shallow. I keep forgetting that

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BluegrassBaldGuy
Wow that is amazingly superficial. Let me know how that works out for you.

 

Agreed. Here's my question man: what is it about a cane that is so horrifying to you?

 

I've just never heard of a person being so negative towards someone using a cane. Do you think it makes them look old, which somehow makes you look bad? When I see someone walking around with a cane, there's not a single negative thought that crosses my mind. I don't know, just weird.

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Ok I get it, only women get to be shallow. I keep forgetting that

 

Sorry buddy! I wouldn't flip out just because my date used crutches or a cane on a second date. For me personally, that's just silly. But as I said, you're entitled to your preferences. No need to get all defensive.

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Agreed. Here's my question man: what is it about a cane that is so horrifying to you?

 

I've just never heard of a person being so negative towards someone using a cane. Do you think it makes them look old, which somehow makes you look bad? When I see someone walking around with a cane, there's not a single negative thought that crosses my mind. I don't know, just weird.

 

At this point in my life, I don't want to be on a date with a woman using a cane.

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At this point in my life, I don't want to be on a date with a woman using a cane.

 

What if you've got a girlfriend you've been seeing for a while and something happens that causes her to have to use a cane occasionally? Do you just break up with her at that point?

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What if you've got a girlfriend you've been seeing for a while and something happens that causes her to have to use a cane occasionally? Do you just break up with her at that point?

 

 

Of course not, this was a 2nd date and no mention of a cane before the date. I wonder how many females would be ok with a guy just showing up out of nowhere with a cane on a date

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Yesterday you were posting about how this is the first second date you've had since 2011.

 

4 years of no progress and you toss it away over a cane?

 

Last year I had a torn ligament. I had to use crutches to get around for a while. More than once people suggested a cane so that I had something to support myself in case the ankle pain got to be too much. I never got one out of pure stubbornness, but GEEZ I can only imagine how I would've felt getting over that injury if someone clearly was uncomfortable with me needing a little extra help getting around.

 

My ankle is as healed as it'll get now, and I can move around just fine.

 

I hope you never suffer an injury that makes it difficult to walk unassisted, even if it's just a short time.

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Yesterday you were posting about how this is the first second date you've had since 2011.

 

4 years of no progress and you toss it away over a cane?

 

Last year I had a torn ligament. I had to use crutches to get around for a while. More than once people suggested a cane so that I had something to support myself in case the ankle pain got to be too much. I never got one out of pure stubbornness, but GEEZ I can only imagine how I would've felt getting over that injury if someone clearly was uncomfortable with me needing a little extra help getting around.

 

My ankle is as healed as it'll get now, and I can move around just fine.

 

I hope you never suffer an injury that makes it difficult to walk unassisted, even if it's just a short time.

 

 

There was no cane on date 1

 

No mention of a cane after date 1

 

No mention of a cane before date 2

 

 

She shows up with a cane and how do you expect me to react? I never experienced being in a busy part of town on a saturday night with a woman using a cane. If I had known that I would have suggested a different type of area

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I'm still wondering what the cane had to do with the date. Why would she mention it? Wasn't this a dinner date in a restaurant?

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I'm still wondering what the cane had to do with the date. Why would she mention it? Wasn't this a dinner date in a restaurant?

 

Yes but I had planned something else but since she had the cane I decided to cancel it because it involved a lot of walking.

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BlackOpsZombieGirl
I'm still wondering what the cane had to do with the date. Wasn't this a dinner date in a restaurant?

 

I think it has to do with the fact that he's EMBARRASSED to be seen with a person using a cane...because canes have a connotation with senior citizens and old age in the OP's eyes. I can see if he was actually dating an old person using a cane that he'd have a reaction like that. But, if this woman is in his age bracket and using one, I'm sure she's fully aware of how she'd look and probably is also embarrassed about having to use it on her date! But she bravely went ahead and went on the date with the OP because she LIKES the OP and hopes that he wouldn't think badly of her or wasn't embarrassed by being seen with her using the cane.

 

I feel bad for the OP's date.:( I hope she doesn't let this experience discourage her from going on other dates while her hip is healing. Even if the OP was a "perfect gentleman" and didn't tell her directly that her cane usage embarrassed him to death and disgusted him - I'm pretty damn sure she SENSED IT from him and FELT IT, like a green vapor oozing out of every pore of his body.

 

 

.

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Yes but I had planned something else but since she had the cane I decided to cancel it because it involved a lot of walking.

 

Booohooo!! you don't come up with surprises on a second date. You stick to the original plans which was dinner in a restaurant, if you wanted to walk on the beach or downtown you should have offered the idea at the same time as the dinner invitation.

 

I am sure Jessica Biel is as lovely with a can. You are really coming across as a jerk tonight, I am starting to understand why no 2nd date came about since 2011.

 

Also the date was about meeting her, not about your little fun downtown. You really need to grow up.

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