GH101 Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 Ok, my friend wants to date, but is concerned this beauty flaw will stop her from getting and keeping guys. She suffers with a lot of facial hair; mostly on her neck and jawline. She uses a cute electric razor and puts on makeup to cover it. I could never tell she has any unless I was really looking or she pointed it out. Then maybe I would see a few dots, bumps, few hairs or a hint of a shadow in good light, but again I would never notice on my own. However, she is especially concerned a guy will be able to feel it. Her face is kind of rough and stubbly if you rub against her face a certain way. She is working on finding better methods to get rid of the hair, but right now this is the best she can do. So do you think a guy shouldn't date her because of this? Would this be a deal breaker for you, if everything else was good? Link to post Share on other sites
MoreFire Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 Can't she not use laser to get rid of it permanently ? 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 Since you keep posting about this, can I ask what your friend has been doing to fix her hair growth problem? What professional advice she has thought? Link to post Share on other sites
Author GH101 Posted April 16, 2015 Author Share Posted April 16, 2015 Can't she not use laser to get rid of it permanently ? Well she has pcos, which is a hormonal imbalance, so laser doesn't work and she had a bad reaction to it (gave her headaches) She is trying to work on it, but right now this is the best she can do. She wants to know if she can still date or is it pretty pointless until she solves this beauty flaw? Link to post Share on other sites
Author GH101 Posted April 16, 2015 Author Share Posted April 16, 2015 Since you keep posting about this, can I ask what your friend has been doing to fix her hair growth problem? What professional advice she has thought? Well I have been trying to help her by posting on here for advice; I feel bad for her. Professionals have recommended medicines such a birth control and other pills. However, they cause side effects and she is concerned. She has been trying some natural remedies and they have made the hair a little lighter she says. She just feels dating is pointless until she fixes this issue; do you think it is? Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 Well I have been trying to help her by posting on here for advice; I feel bad for her. Professionals have recommended medicines such a birth control and other pills. However, they cause side effects and she is concerned. She has been trying some natural remedies and they have made the hair a little lighter she says. She just feels dating is pointless until she fixes this issue; do you think it is? Of course not. It's very common. Link to post Share on other sites
Author GH101 Posted April 16, 2015 Author Share Posted April 16, 2015 Of course not. It's very common. Well she probably has more than the average woman. She is just concerned a guy will feel it and dump her. Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 Then she should try various treatments to see what works. There are lots of things that can be done to keep it under control. Link to post Share on other sites
ascendotum Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 You will be probably be a better judge than us on this issue since you get to see her up close. With what she does now to mask it I'd say its not a dealbreaker in terms of her getting a bf (though hard to say how bad your friend is). It may lose her some bfs along the way though who might end up having hang ups about it over time, though I'm sure they will never say its a big deal, but who knows. I've known a number of women that had face fuzz (generally Mediterranean/middle east/Paki girls) and they had bfs, though just simply having any ol guy as a bf who doesn't care about her condition is not the ideal outcome it should to be a guy she really wants. If she is too self conscious about and becomes real shy it wont help her chances. I don't know much about pcos beyond it caused by hormonal imbalance, but if she sees a doc who knows his stuff, can't her hormones be balanced? Link to post Share on other sites
Author GH101 Posted April 16, 2015 Author Share Posted April 16, 2015 Then she should try various treatments to see what works. There are lots of things that can be done to keep it under control. Well she has, but everything has side effects. It's just really tough to get rid of or even control. Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 Well she has, but everything has side effects. It's just really tough to get rid of or even control. Then she has to manage the side effects. I'm taking laser treatment on some hairs I have and manage the side effects. The alternative is to sit around and b**ch about how tough life is. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author GH101 Posted April 16, 2015 Author Share Posted April 16, 2015 You will be probably be a better judge than us on this issue since you get to see her up close. With what she does now to mask it I'd say its not a dealbreaker in terms of her getting a bf (though hard to say how bad your friend is). It may lose her some bfs along the way though who might end up having hang ups about it over time, though I'm sure they will never say its a big deal, but who knows. I've known a number of women that had face fuzz (generally Mediterranean/middle east/Paki girls) and they had bfs, though just simply having any ol guy as a bf who doesn't care about her condition is not the ideal outcome it should to be a guy she really wants. If she is too self conscious about and becomes real shy it wont help her chances. I don't know much about pcos beyond it caused by hormonal imbalance, but if she sees a doc who knows his stuff, can't her hormones be balanced? I don't see any unless I really looked. However, you would probably feel it if you rubbed against her face. Well she has more than face fuzz, since she has a hormonal imbalance. I don't think a guy would initially notice until they started getting close. I usually just say if a guy dumps you because of that you probably are better off. I don't think it's bad enough for a guy to dump her imo; I've seen worse things on people. Well docs like to just mask the problem with medication and its not that simple. Medicines don't really fix the problem and sometimes just make it worse or cause other side effects. You can't just take a pill and it will be gone. Link to post Share on other sites
Author GH101 Posted April 16, 2015 Author Share Posted April 16, 2015 Then she has to manage the side effects. I'm taking laser treatment on some hairs I have and manage the side effects. The alternative is to sit around and b**ch about how tough life is. Well laser won't really work for her since she has an underlying condition. The side effects she got from it were headaches and her eyes bothered her from the heat/light. She didn't feel well for a week after her session; I felt bad. Laser just reduces the hair temporally anyways. What side effects do you have from Laser? Well she doesn't really bit** about it, she handles it well imo. She is always saying this should be the worse of her problems. She just gets concerned and self conscious about dating a guy with it; which is understandable. Link to post Share on other sites
guest569 Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 Then she has to manage the side effects. I'm taking laser treatment on some hairs I have and manage the side effects. The alternative is to sit around and b**ch about how tough life is. Harsh. . 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author GH101 Posted April 16, 2015 Author Share Posted April 16, 2015 She really just wanted a poll of yes or no answers to see if it really is a deal breaker before she tries to find a relationship. I do appreciate the advice and help I can pass along to her though. Link to post Share on other sites
ascendotum Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 She really just wanted a poll of yes or no answers to see if it really is a deal breaker before she tries to find a relationship. I do appreciate the advice and help I can pass along to her though. If you say its not that noticeable, then she should be good to go on the dating scene. Maybe some guys might freak out when they brush up against her face when smooching, but others wont care so much if they think she's a cool/fun/cute/sexy girl. If she has had a few guys get all 'eeeww' on her when they kissed or make smartarse remarks about her face then I could understand her being extra self conscious about the condition, but otherwise she should look on the positive side to start with and flirt some more with the guys she likes....and see what happens Link to post Share on other sites
Author GH101 Posted April 16, 2015 Author Share Posted April 16, 2015 If you say its not that noticeable, then she should be good to go on the dating scene. Maybe some guys might freak out when they brush up against her face when smooching, but others wont care so much if they think she's a cool/fun/cute/sexy girl. If she has had a few guys get all 'eeeww' on her when they kissed or make smartarse remarks about her face then I could understand her being extra self conscious about the condition, but otherwise she should look on the positive side to start with and flirt some more with the guys she likes....and see what happens Well, she doesn't have much luck with dating to begin with. She doesn't really have a good outlet to meet guys, which is similar to me. She hasn't had much experience with fooling around with guys to see if they would have a problem with it. She just feels like whats the point of trying to date if guys won't be able to accept the roughness. Link to post Share on other sites
Toodaloo Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 Harsh. . But true... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author GH101 Posted April 16, 2015 Author Share Posted April 16, 2015 Well she really just wanted to know if she should even try to date or is it just too much of a deal breaker? Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 She is just concerned a guy will feel it and dump her. Then she has dodged a bullet. Does she really want to stay with a guy who would dump her for such a shallow reason? Anyone worth dating will judge her for her personality, not just her appearance. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author GH101 Posted April 16, 2015 Author Share Posted April 16, 2015 Then she has dodged a bullet. Does she really want to stay with a guy who would dump her for such a shallow reason? Anyone worth dating will judge her for her personality, not just her appearance. Exactly what I told her, but she isn't sure. She just thinks it might be too much of a deal breaker to date. Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 Exactly what I told her, but she isn't sure. She just thinks it might be too much of a deal breaker to date. Her lack of confidence and self-esteem will be much more of a problem. No matter how much she shaves her hairs and pads one boob, her lack of body acceptance will shine through like it's tattooed on her forehead. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author GH101 Posted April 16, 2015 Author Share Posted April 16, 2015 Her lack of confidence and self-esteem will be much more of a problem. No matter how much she shaves her hairs and pads one boob, her lack of body acceptance will shine through like it's tattooed on her forehead. Good point, they are two separate friends though Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 Everything in life is a choice. In my opinion she needs to take the hormones and bite the dust concerning the side effects. The thing with the pill is you need to take them a good 3 months before side effects subside. Also, having such a hormonal imbalance without treating it and letting it free to get worse doesn't sound like good medicine to me. Shaving it sounds like the worse solution. Has she looked into waxing? I know a woman that her face is covered in a duvet so she has it removed by a professional and they use wax. Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 She really just wanted a poll of yes or no answers to see if it really is a deal breaker before she tries to find a relationship. I do appreciate the advice and help I can pass along to her though. One word. Electrolysis.... it's expensive but well worth it. Won't interfere with your poc marks either. There is also a little hand held gadget on the market called the "no no" - $300 approx.. When used regularly, it removes hair from the entire body, including your face, permanently. Will take about six months. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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