GH101 Posted April 15, 2015 Share Posted April 15, 2015 I've been on plenty of fish and okcupid for 4 years, and nothing good has ever came from it. Either the guys I go out with don't like me, or if they do like me they turn out to be crazy. These sites are the only places I have to meet guys, should I continue to stay on them, or is it ridiculous at this point? Where else can I meet people at? Link to post Share on other sites
Toodaloo Posted April 15, 2015 Share Posted April 15, 2015 You have to kiss a heck of a lot of frogs before you kiss a prince... Don't panic. Perhaps change the type of people you are talking to. Get some up to date photos that are flattering. Change the wording etc... As for meeting men in real life you just have to start talking to them. You will be rejected, you will make an idiot of yourself but you are going to get no where unless you try. Join clubs, take up sports, get involved with drama groups, learn a new skill... If anyone ever asks if you are single say "yes - still looking for Mr Right!" with a happy breezy tone and they may well have a son, nephew, uncle, friend, brother etc... Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted April 15, 2015 Share Posted April 15, 2015 You can stay on them if you like but your current profile doesn't seem to be attracting the right sorts. It would be well worth a visit to the profile reviews forum on your chosen OLD sites. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted April 15, 2015 Share Posted April 15, 2015 It's one tool but if it's your only tool, that's where you are going wrong. You can meet people anywhere but try these tips: tell friends & family you are open to being introduced to new people go to a reunion of some sort look around in your daily life: who gets coffee where you do? Who is in the elevator at work? join a MeetUp group get involved in a hobby join a co-ed sports team volunteer doing something you enjoy. Do you like animals? Walk a shelter dog. Do you like theater? Become an usher. Do you like art? Volunteer at a museum. The 2016 presidential election is getting underway. I have met tons of amazing guys at political events so get involved & roll up your sleeves for your favorite candidate. Take or teach a class. If you pick teach you can't get involved with the students if it's a for credit academic thing (you're the professor) but if it's adult education there are no such restrictions. Go to networking / educational events for your business / industry Go speed dating Take a singles cruise look up singles groups in your area. There used to be one around here Leashes & Lovers. You could bring your dog. My large Dalmatian got me way more attention then the women who showed up with dogs in their purses though. Summer's coming. Do a share house 2 Link to post Share on other sites
ZA Dater Posted April 15, 2015 Share Posted April 15, 2015 My opinion is to get off the sites, I have been on 4 different ones over the course of 5 years and I can honestly say no matter what your expectations are its a fairly brutal rejection filled environment. For me the burden of being rejected over and over actually made me blind to how ineffective the sites are, lucky I took a step back, looked at it and don't worry too much about the sites anymore. Having said that meeting people is a severe problem. I think you need to decide how important dating is for you and then make a decision, me, I just came to the conclusion if the best I can do are people I don't want and those I do, don't want me, well its time to just try and forget the whole idea. Not perhaps the solution you had in mind but I advocate taking a break from the sites for a few weeks and then decide. Link to post Share on other sites
Throldur Posted April 15, 2015 Share Posted April 15, 2015 I'm giving up on online dating for the moment.. It works for some people and some people it doesn't. My best friend met his girlfriend on there. They've been together for 3-4 years now. It seems that the girls on there are just very very selective. When you're someone like me who's just no photogenic, then I get passed over very easily. I know my chances will only come through in person stuff.. but I'll keep my profile active on the off-chance some girl messages me first. Time to get my confidence back. You should do the same. Link to post Share on other sites
Bobbi7 Posted April 16, 2015 Share Posted April 16, 2015 No, get off of them temporary! The guys that I want, aren't interested, then the ones that are interested, I'm not attracted to, and turn out to be controlling and pushy. Link to post Share on other sites
Author GH101 Posted April 16, 2015 Author Share Posted April 16, 2015 I have tried speed dating and meetup groups, that didn't work either. I don't have a job, or many friends. I don't really have anywhere else to meet people. I've been out with 43 different guys, and nothing has worked out. Most of the time they didn't like me, but sometimes I thought they were weird. Has anyone been rejected as much as me but still ended up finding someone? Link to post Share on other sites
Author GH101 Posted April 17, 2015 Author Share Posted April 17, 2015 Any thoughts about all this rejection? Should I just give up on the dating sites and possibly dating. I really want to date, but there's just no where to meet people or the guys don't like me. I mean obviously these dating sites aren't working. Link to post Share on other sites
Author GH101 Posted April 17, 2015 Author Share Posted April 17, 2015 Any thoughts, I could use some more advice? Should I stop going on the dating sites? Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted April 17, 2015 Share Posted April 17, 2015 You've already had advice, what more do you want? Link to post Share on other sites
Author GH101 Posted April 17, 2015 Author Share Posted April 17, 2015 You've already had advice, what more do you want? Well I wanted more advice and opinions. I have been out with 43 guys and they haven't worked out. Link to post Share on other sites
Wisecrack Posted April 17, 2015 Share Posted April 17, 2015 I have tried speed dating and meetup groups, that didn't work either. I don't have a job, or many friends. I don't really have anywhere else to meet people. I've been out with 43 different guys, and nothing has worked out. Most of the time they didn't like me, but sometimes I thought they were weird. Has anyone been rejected as much as me but still ended up finding someone? Sometimes one has to realise the one factor holding you back is yourself. Fix yourself and you'll find the doors open. Time to love yourself and that involves pushing yourself to achieve things you've always dreamed about but never fathomed. Get yourself a job, work building yourself into a better person. You won't realise but it's always those people who work hard at life who seem to suddenly stumble upon a new flame when they least expect it. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted April 17, 2015 Share Posted April 17, 2015 Why aren't you working? Why not get off the computer and go out with female friends, have fun and meet men that way? Link to post Share on other sites
Author GH101 Posted April 17, 2015 Author Share Posted April 17, 2015 Why aren't you working? Why not get off the computer and go out with female friends, have fun and meet men that way? I can't find a job. I apply and search for hours a day. I don't have a degree because I couldn't afford college and it wasn't for me. I did one year. I don't have any experience and I don't know anyone to help me get a job. It's not easy to get a job without knowing someone. I don't have many friends. The few I have don't do the bar scene instead we go to movies, dinner, mall etc. I volunteer at different fundraising events, but there's no guys my age or they're there with there gf's. People make it sound so easy to get a job, degree to better yourself but it's not. You can't just walk out your door and meet friends and guys. If you can you're just lucky. Link to post Share on other sites
Author GH101 Posted April 17, 2015 Author Share Posted April 17, 2015 Sometimes one has to realise the one factor holding you back is yourself. Fix yourself and you'll find the doors open. Time to love yourself and that involves pushing yourself to achieve things you've always dreamed about but never fathomed. Get yourself a job, work building yourself into a better person. You won't realise but it's always those people who work hard at life who seem to suddenly stumble upon a new flame when they least expect it. Nice advice, but it's not that easy. I think I am good. I think I am attractive, can hold a nice convo and is an overall nice person. I don't understand why I cant get 2nd dates. I do love myself, guys don't. I am working on getting a job, but it's not easy when you don't know anybody or have experience. Link to post Share on other sites
logan415 Posted April 18, 2015 Share Posted April 18, 2015 I can't find a job. I apply and search for hours a day. I don't have a degree because I couldn't afford college and it wasn't for me. I did one year. I don't have any experience and I don't know anyone to help me get a job. It's not easy to get a job without knowing someone. I don't have many friends. The few I have don't do the bar scene instead we go to movies, dinner, mall etc. I volunteer at different fundraising events, but there's no guys my age or they're there with there gf's. People make it sound so easy to get a job, degree to better yourself but it's not. You can't just walk out your door and meet friends and guys. If you can you're just lucky. Community colleges offer certifications which are short, could be a year long. You can give that a try. I met most of my friends through a 4 year University, but it is not the only spot to meet people. Link to post Share on other sites
Author GH101 Posted April 20, 2015 Author Share Posted April 20, 2015 Community colleges offer certifications which are short, could be a year long. You can give that a try. I met most of my friends through a 4 year University, but it is not the only spot to meet people. School is simply not for me. I wanted a receptionist job or something in retail. I can't really afford school and I doubt I would meet anyone there. Link to post Share on other sites
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