Hopeful30 Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 I've decided not to say anything to the neighbour I have feelings for. I don't want to disrupt what may potentially be going for him at the moment, and he seems not to be interested in me at all anyways, so it's time to move on. I've read no contact is good, but I run into him frequently as he's a neighbour and we live in a small community. Any suggestions? Link to post Share on other sites
neowulf Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 I've decided not to say anything to the neighbour I have feelings for. I don't want to disrupt what may potentially be going for him at the moment, and he seems not to be interested in me at all anyways, so it's time to move on. I've read no contact is good, but I run into him frequently as he's a neighbour and we live in a small community. Any suggestions? Well, no contact is generally the best option. The more contact you have with him the harder it will be. Second thing is to try and distract yourself with other things. Hobbies, friends, internet dating. Whatever keeps your mind of it. On a side note, I think unrequited love is such a sad thing. Life is so short, would it really be so terrible to simply *try* and see where things go? None of us are mind readers. You can't know what's going on or if he'd appreciate your advances. You gave up before you even started 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hopeful30 Posted March 31, 2015 Author Share Posted March 31, 2015 Well, no contact is generally the best option. The more contact you have with him the harder it will be. Second thing is to try and distract yourself with other things. Hobbies, friends, internet dating. Whatever keeps your mind of it. On a side note, I think unrequited love is such a sad thing. Life is so short, would it really be so terrible to simply *try* and see where things go? None of us are mind readers. You can't know what's going on or if he'd appreciate your advances. You gave up before you even started I appreciate that, thank you Well initially I had decided to voice it, but the last time I saw him he didn't even look me in the eye... and usually we are so friendly. I figured he dislikes me now for whatever reason or just lost interest altogether. Maybe he already made his decision and my advances will be unwanted 1 Link to post Share on other sites
neowulf Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 I appreciate that, thank you Well initially I had decided to voice it, but the last time I saw him he didn't even look me in the eye... and usually we are so friendly. I figured he dislikes me now for whatever reason or just lost interest altogether. Maybe he already made his decision and my advances will be unwanted Or maybe he was having a rough day and felt self conscious? Or maybe he's figured out you like him and he's a bit shy about it all? Or yes, maybe he's just not interested and trying to give you the cold shoulder. The thing to remember is, this isn't about him. It's about you. Your feelings. Your ability to own them and not be ashamed to express them. Being attracted to someone isn't something to be ashamed of. Isn't something you should hide because you're scared of being rejected. It's a compliment! I've never been upset over a woman having a crush on me, even when I wasn't interested in having a relationship with her. Ask him out for a drink. He turns you down, you've got your answer. It's what every guy ever has had to do. Trust me, you'll survive being rejected. It's a hell of a lot easier to deal with than unresolved feelings. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 Trust me, you'll survive being rejected. It's a hell of a lot easier to deal with than unresolved feelings. I agree with that. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hopeful30 Posted March 31, 2015 Author Share Posted March 31, 2015 Trust me, you'll survive being rejected. It's a hell of a lot easier to deal with than unresolved feelings. Hmm.. I suppose that makes sense. At least I'll have a final answer instead of always wondering "what if." Goddamit, I hate emotional disturbances! I was so peaceful before I started liking him lol 1 Link to post Share on other sites
neowulf Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 Hmm.. I suppose that makes sense. At least I'll have a final answer instead of always wondering "what if." Goddamit, I hate emotional disturbances! I was so peaceful before I started liking him lol You're not alone. We've all been there. You're travelling along happy in your life and suddenly, someone makes you *FEEL* something. The anxiety, the discomfort. The uncertainty. "Do they like me?". A very well travelled road. You can do this though. I've never had unrequited love. As soon as I know I'm keen, I just go for it. Yes, I get shot down.. but I'd rather try and fail, then try and live with the "what if's" of missed opportunity. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gary S Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 The way you do it is to find a replacement. So start dating even if you don't feel like it. It's good therapy. Nothing can make you forget the old flame like a new man can! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hopeful30 Posted April 1, 2015 Author Share Posted April 1, 2015 The way you do it is to find a replacement. So start dating even if you don't feel like it. It's good therapy. Nothing can make you forget the old flame like a new man can! That's unfair to the new guy lol Link to post Share on other sites
Gloria25 Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 No contact, ignore him, stay busy.... Neighbor or not, if you follow ^^ you won't even notice if he is breathing. And, don't ask him out...you've done enough already and he's not interested. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hopeful30 Posted April 1, 2015 Author Share Posted April 1, 2015 And, don't ask him out...you've done enough already and he's not interested. How do you know what I've done? Link to post Share on other sites
Gloria25 Posted April 1, 2015 Share Posted April 1, 2015 How do you know what I've done? How do I know? Based on your initiation of this thread...see below: I've decided not to say anything to the neighbour I have feelings for. I don't want to disrupt what may potentially be going for him at the moment, and he seems not to be interested in me at all anyways, so it's time to move on. I've read no contact is good, but I run into him frequently as he's a neighbour and we live in a small community. Any suggestions? I'm just giving my opinion here...After being put through the ringer recently on dude I tried so hard to get to look my way w/o any results - I'd hate to see you waste your time too. I'm just advising you to let it go because I care... Link to post Share on other sites
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