emi Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 Well the title pretty sum up everything i wanted to ask:bunny::bunny: Link to post Share on other sites
Justanaverageguy Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 (edited) Not at all - A woman being successful, ambitious and driven is one of the biggest turn on's for me. Its a common factor with all of my previous serious partners. I honestly wouldn't really care if she made more or less then me as long as she was ambitious, passionate and successful with what she did. Success doesn't always have to be measured in more dollars and cents either. For me nothing could be a bigger turn off then a woman who didn't really have any professional ambition of her own and just wanted to get married have kids and be a stay at home mum or a woman who just wanted to be a ditzy trophy wife. Edited March 31, 2015 by Justanaverageguy Link to post Share on other sites
TaxAHCruel Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 I can only speak for myself and not "men" as if we were some kind of ubiquitous group made of one mould. But not only does it not intimidate me - I somewhat require it to even be attracted to girls in the first place. My current partners are a mix of the two. One is a freelance translator - so in terms of finances and so forth she would not rate as "successful". But she is massively intelligent - speaks multiple languages to native standard - and does not just translate the works she works on - but really goes indepth and learns them. Be it a medical science paper on some cutting edge technology - or some translation project for a history museum - she will get indepth and really learn the material behind the work being translated. The other is still in academia - in law - teaching and studying. Her earnings are going steadily upwards and she will out earn me soon enough and I likely will never catch up. I do enjoy calling her Dr. since she got her doctorate. And she appears to be on a mission to get more letters before and after her name - than actually in it. Never been intimated by this - and to be honest I can not think of a single reason why I might. Link to post Share on other sites
Diezel Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 This would only intimidate an insecure man. 8 Link to post Share on other sites
Author emi Posted March 31, 2015 Author Share Posted March 31, 2015 Well, im not really asking this for myself. I just happened randomly over-heared someone's conversation. Someone said to his friend '' dont marry her, shes too successful for you, she will '' climb to ur head'' and stay there'' this afternoon:laugh: I get a kick out of how women sometime come to these boards complaining about how they only assume that they aren't successful in dating only because men find their success in dating. I don't buy it as they are only assuming why these men are not wanting to date them. Link to post Share on other sites
Krieger Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 (edited) Well I work retail so I do not have a career so it limits the woman I can date. Not to many woman that make good money and are successful in there career will give a guy the time of day if he not successful. I will not date a girl that makes way more money than me because I know guys that did and they throw it in there face in a fight. If i knew a girl made 2 to 3 times as much as me i would not even talk to her seeing she would not give me the time of day. Good news is I am working on getting out of dead end retail and getting a career. I laugh in my old bosses face when he tried to tell me retail a career . Edited March 31, 2015 by Krieger Link to post Share on other sites
Krieger Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 All I have to say is If i was successful I would not give a girl the time of day unless she had a career or owned her own business. Also it would be all right if she was in school and working towards some thing better. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Krieger Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 This would only intimidate an insecure man. I would not say I would be intimidated but I just know she ask me what I do for a living and I say I work retail with people Kmart said NO too. Link to post Share on other sites
guest569 Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 All I have to say is If i was successful I would not give a girl the time of day unless she had a career or owned her own business. Also it would be all right if she was in school and working towards some thing better. Wow.... so because you see yourself as 'unsuccessful' what if you meet a fellow 'unsuccessful' woman but you become a success and dump her? Is it ok because she earns less than you, but not ok because she isn't fancy enough... Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 I think that many men want successful and intelligent women, but it takes a special kind of man and a rare one IMO to want a woman long term that is more successful and/or more intelligent than he is. Fine for your layabout user of a man perhaps, but for men who have pride in their job and pride in their ability to provide, it starts to grate. Sure they like the extra money, and they may say they do not care, but long term... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Krieger Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 Wow.... so because you see yourself as 'unsuccessful' what if you meet a fellow 'unsuccessful' woman but you become a success and dump her? Is it ok because she earns less than you, but not ok because she isn't fancy enough... Well if i meet a girl that had a dead end job like I do she better be working towards something if her life goal if to work fast food I am not interested. I am unsuccessful right now but I am driven to change that . It is all this desire to feel like I am not a loser drives me. Also I am motivated by a fear of hating myself. I do not want to date a woman that hates her job and I love mine once I become successful. All I am going to say is if i get sick and cant work for what ever reason her 20k a year will not go far wear I live . Unless you want to turn tricks for oatmeal so you can eat. Link to post Share on other sites
Penguin_hugs Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 I heard a phrase once that said that intelligence wise A class men want B class women and B class women want A class men. The difficulty arises when you are an A class woman. I don't know if intimidation is the correct term- but on *some* occasions the differences in intelligence just mean that you can't have decent conversations. I don't mean that this is the case for everyone- but personally I've always been top of school/ uni etc. I'm on the most academic course at my Uni and there are no guys who can keep up. I'm a sapiophile so I always want someone more intelligent than me because I get off on being educated! I'd barely dated because we either couldn't have reasonable conversations or priorities were different. In the end I met my BF online and he's like the A* equivalent- so it works 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Arieswoman Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 All I know about this is that I am a professional woman (own business in healthcare) and made more money than my first husband (who was a graduate). He liked the lifestyle that my earnings gave us but didn't want to put equal effort in when it came to household chores/cooking. When I told him I wanted equal input his answer was to cheat with a girl from work who was as thick as a brick and packed items in boxes on a production line. It seems to me he wanted a "Stepford Wife" not a partnership of equals. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Krieger Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 I think that many men want successful and intelligent women, but it takes a special kind of man and a rare one IMO to want a woman long term that is more successful and/or more intelligent than he is. Fine for your layabout user of a man perhaps, but for men who have pride in their job and pride in their ability to provide, it starts to grate. Sure they like the extra money, and they may say they do not care, but long term... There is noting wrong with a woman wanting a career but if a guy stuck at a dead end job with no upward mobility it can be hard for a guy to feel like he has things to offer in a relationship she would wear the pants that for sure. I think if they both had careers that they both loves it would not matter how much she made or he made. It is when a woman makes 2 to 3 times much money than you it hard not to feel good about yourself and on top of working a dead end crap job it too much to handle. Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 Great question as we have a few successful women on this board. To me it's a matter of generation. If I meet a man that was born before 1970 then yes he will be intimidated. He was born and raised in the generation where men were thought to be the providers, were more educated, earned more etc If I meet a man born after 1970, and I met and dated my share of younger men, they find my success attractive and sexy. They don't feel threaten because to them it's normal I am further ahead as I am older. Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 All I know about this is that I am a professional woman (own business in healthcare) and made more money than my first husband (who was a graduate). He liked the lifestyle that my earnings gave us but didn't want to put equal effort in when it came to household chores/cooking. When I told him I wanted equal input his answer was to cheat with a girl from work who was as thick as a brick and packed items in boxes on a production line. It seems to me he wanted a "Stepford Wife" not a partnership of equals. Yes, that is a valid issue, housework and looking after kids is pretty boring mundane stuff and many men do want to hand all that over to the wife. Fine if nannies and domestic help can be procured, but if not, then a successful, intelligent women may not be very keen to accept that role. It can be a breeding ground for resentment, both for the woman who didn't spend years educating herself to end up cleaning, tidying up the house and being a glorified nanny. And for the man, who may see other men and their kids, being taken care of by more compliant women. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Arieswoman Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 (edited) Elaine657, You nailed it here ;- It can be a breeding ground for resentment, both for the woman who didn't spend years educating herself to end up cleaning, tidying up the house and being a glorified nanny. And for the man, who may see other men and their kids, being taken care of by more compliant women. My exH refused to allow any domestic help about the house because "he didn't want strangers poking around" Looking back I think he had a lot of issues He married his AP after I divorced him, so now he has a wife who has no career ambitions and is happy to be a sexual housekeeper. Her only requirement seems to be a foreign holiday twice a year to Playa las Americas (Canary Islands) or some other cut-price lager-louts' resort. Edited March 31, 2015 by Arieswoman 1 Link to post Share on other sites
road Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 Not at all - A woman being successful, ambitious and driven is one of the biggest turn on's for me. Its a common factor with all of my previous serious partners. I honestly wouldn't really care if she made more or less then me as long as she was ambitious, passionate and successful with what she did. Success doesn't always have to be measured in more dollars and cents either. For me nothing could be a bigger turn off then a woman who didn't really have any professional ambition of her own and just wanted to get married have kids and be a stay at home mum or a woman who just wanted to be a ditzy trophy wife. So you need a woman that can keep you living in a style that is better then the one you can provide. Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 So you need a woman that can keep you living in a style that is better then the one you can provide. I don't think that's what he said road.... not even close! In fact he made a point to mention it's not at all about dollars and cents. Did you miss that part? Can you explain how you came to interpret his post that way? Link to post Share on other sites
Revolver Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 When this topic was first brought up it was thought they were talking about women who were Things like CEO's and politicians. Now everyone women who has a generic degree and decent job but is single uses this as some rallying cry for why they don't have a man. I've seen a female social worker who makes 45,000 a year talking about "men are intimidated by me". 1 Link to post Share on other sites
road Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 (edited) I have seen to many men making$30 to $50 g a year married to women that were making $20 to $60 g. Only to have their wife 10 years later making $100 to $200 g a year. That decides life would be so much better if she was married to one of her peers at work or management above her. At 11 years, the husband is here in denial but has suspicions while. Living in denial telling us no way is his wife having an affair. We tell him the gut is never wrong. Eventually we get him to trust his gut so he does the VAR, GPS, key logger on the PC, spyware and GPS the phone, phone bills. He learns that he is a BH with a WW banging some 6 figure OM/co-worker. When I was young to me if the woman that I married was from a wealthy family, or she had a highly paid career it would of been as I won the lottery. Though her income potential was not a requirement to be my wife. Though I expected her to earn money before and after child rearing. However if I made a lot of money I would of have no problem with her being a stay at home. Now that I am older and have seen many wives earning a lot more money then their husband only to become a WW makes me nervous as to her being wife material. Edited March 31, 2015 by road Link to post Share on other sites
road Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 Not at all - A woman being successful, ambitious and driven is one of the biggest turn on's for me. Its a common factor with all of my previous serious partners. I honestly wouldn't really care if she made more or less then me as long as she was ambitious, passionate and successful with what she did. Success doesn't always have to be measured in more dollars and cents either. For me nothing could be a bigger turn off then a woman who didn't really have any professional ambition of her own and just wanted to get married have kids and be a stay at home mum or a woman who just wanted to be a ditzy trophy wife. I don't think that's what he said road.... not even close! In fact he made a point to mention it's not at all about dollars and cents. Did you miss that part? Can you explain how you came to interpret his post that way? That is all about dollars and cents. Wife does not want to work means no dollars and cents from the wife. Wife that is not a professional means that wife when she does work means that the dollars and cents will be few. Link to post Share on other sites
Gary S Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 It depends on her attitude. As along as she does not rub it in the guys face, it's okay. Link to post Share on other sites
road Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 When this topic was first brought up it was thought they were talking about women who were Things like CEO's and politicians. Now everyone women who has a generic degree and decent job but is single uses this as some rallying cry for why they don't have a man. I've seen a female social worker who makes 45,000 a year talking about "men are intimidated by me". On a 1 to 10 where would you rate this woman? She sounds as if she is in denial with a low number combined with an extreme liberal Feminazi position that is her turnoff. So she hides behind that men must be intimidated by me. ROTFALMAO Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted March 31, 2015 Share Posted March 31, 2015 That is all about dollars and cents. Wife does not want to work means no dollars and cents from the wife. Wife that is not a professional means that wife when she does work means that the dollars and cents will be few. He said it's not about dollars and cents though..are you calling him a liar? It's about emotional compatibility... he is attracted to smart ambitious women ..just like I am attracted to smart ambitious men, and it's not about the money for me either! I have my own money! I don't need his. It's about being with a man whose qualities, intelligence and ambition I desire and am attracted to. It's NO different for men! You are projecting your own beliefs on to the poster who wrote that...which is not fair... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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