Goodbye or do I have a shot?

[theseaofred1982]

We were friends before we started seeing each other. We also worked in the same building so we see each other here and there. She was married to a porn and video game addict for 2.5 year, she also claimed he was the worst in bed and hates kissing him. After they seperated we began seeing each other. Things moved to quickly and she ask if we could just be friends with benefits. I agreed. She tells me I'm the best kisser and sex she ever had and that I do everything right not just in the bedroom. Then the roles switched and she got attached to me and somewhat jealous of other women, but she denies it. Before we became just friends with benefits I told her that I would be glad to be exclusive, but she said she wasn't ready for that. Long story short, she and her roommate had a fallout which forced her to live with her husband for the time being. Because of this she admitted she should probably give her husband a second chance. She said she's been running away from her feelings instead of facing them; she needs to "work on herself."I agreed. Its now been a week and her friends told me she cannot stand kissing her husband and they both agreed to terminate the marriage. Since she moved back I barely hear from her. When she texted once, I was brief and friendly with my response. When we see each other at work, we're pretty friendly to each other, but our conversations are short. I don't intend on initiating the contact, but I do miss her. I know her marriage is over and yes our agreement was only friend with benefits but we both knew it was becoming more than that. Is it possible she misses me and some time down the future she would give me a shot? I do intend on moving on, but I can't help it, I fell for her.

[barcode88]

Sounds like both of you are on alternating wavelengths and have yet to connect. Give it time maybe, let things happen naturally. Of course if you aren't exclusive, don't hold out for her - date other women too.

[DatingDirection]

Yes, it sounds like she will have you on her mind. And from reading your post, it sounds like you answered your own question. You're intuition may be right. Good luck.

 

 

We were friends before we started seeing each other. We also worked in the same building so we see each other here and there. She was married to a porn and video game addict for 2.5 year, she also claimed he was the worst in bed and hates kissing him. After they seperated we began seeing each other. Things moved to quickly and she ask if we could just be friends with benefits. I agreed. She tells me I'm the best kisser and sex she ever had and that I do everything right not just in the bedroom. Then the roles switched and she got attached to me and somewhat jealous of other women, but she denies it. Before we became just friends with benefits I told her that I would be glad to be exclusive, but she said she wasn't ready for that. Long story short, she and her roommate had a fallout which forced her to live with her husband for the time being. Because of this she admitted she should probably give her husband a second chance. She said she's been running away from her feelings instead of facing them; she needs to "work on herself."I agreed. Its now been a week and her friends told me she cannot stand kissing her husband and they both agreed to terminate the marriage. Since she moved back I barely hear from her. When she texted once, I was brief and friendly with my response. When we see each other at work, we're pretty friendly to each other, but our conversations are short. I don't intend on initiating the contact, but I do miss her. I know her marriage is over and yes our agreement was only friend with benefits but we both knew it was becoming more than that. Is it possible she misses me and some time down the future she would give me a shot? I do intend on moving on, but I can't help it, I fell for her.

[Hawaii51]

You >always< have a shot!

[DoesntGetIt]

Her life is going to be a mess for a while and she will not be in any place to be ready for a proper emotional connection.

 

 

I say this as someone who came out of a marriage and quickly got involved with someone I knew. It went great initially, but I made mistakes such as getting too attached too quickly (the whole thing moved quickly from both of our ends) due to not being in the right place to have started a new relationship.

 

 

That ended, and our friendship we had has obviously suffered, although I believe it can be salvaged. I shouldn't have gone into that until I was ready and I've now missed my shot of being with her now that I am ready.

 

 

 

 

So be her friend, be there for her, but don't let things progress (definitely not sexually, that was the biggest mistake I made was doing that too soon with someone I cared about) until she has had time to come out of the marriage and adjust to her new life. You'll stand a much better chance of things working out that way.

[theseaofred1982]

In the past, before we got together I was very open to her about my relationships with other women, which I think intrigue her. Now that everything is a bit awkward, do I go about it the same way? Should I talk about my dating life like I did before? Or would that be a bad idea?

[DoesntGetIt]

In the past, before we got together I was very open to her about my relationships with other women, which I think intrigue her. Now that everything is a bit awkward, do I go about it the same way? Should I talk about my dating life like I did before? Or would that be a bad idea?

 

 

 

No need to be bringing it up, but if she brings it up sometime there is no point in lying about it either.

[Buddhist]

I'd say you've got a chance, just not right this very minute. She's in a process(divorce) that is taking up her attention and emotional energy. If you can back off for a month of two and check in with her on friendly terms then this could all come right.