overseas2004 Posted November 27, 2004 Share Posted November 27, 2004 Bear with me all, I have posted about this guy before but he is driving me insane. I have gone out with him on numerous occasions for about three months and nothing happened until last Friday when he started kissing me and touching me all over. I pushed him away slightly and asked him why we have been dating here and there for three months with no prior sexual contact. He went into this story about how he got divorced 4 years ago and how he got hurt and does not believe in love anymore. He said that he he has a girlfriend. But that he does not intend to marry her. He claims she is not intellectually suited for him and that she knows how he feels also but admits that she is thinking she can change the situation with him. I told him we could not have sex and we just fell asleep in each others arms. Unfortunately the next morning the inevitable happened and I did sleep with him. I decided to just let the whole thing go. I had no chance to change his attitude etc.... Two nights ago (five nights after we last saw each other? I got a SMS from him at 11 pm which just said ... good night... Nothing else. I decided not to answer. It has been two days now. And I keep second guessing myself if that might have been a mistake. Also I am torturing myself and not sleeping at night trying to figure out why he wrote and what he hoped to accomplish with that message. Yeah I got it bad... I know... and I am trying really really hard to resist. But I need your support. Link to post Share on other sites
tokyo Posted November 27, 2004 Share Posted November 27, 2004 I´m not sure if I have answered to your prior posts, but if I recall it correctly you were confused about him, because he never planned a date in advance and always called like an hour before. I don´t think that looked that good, but this here definitely is NOT GOOD. He has a girldfriend but makes a move at you and you are still wondering what to do????? Come on...... Get out of this relationship or affaire, it´s really unhealthy for you. Doesn´t matter what he has written, this man is not good for you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author overseas2004 Posted November 27, 2004 Author Share Posted November 27, 2004 Yes kooky you are right. We have gone on about 10 dates and most of them are not planned that much in advance. It was like a few hours before that he called. I would usually say no and then he would call again and plan it a bit in advance. I KNOW ITS NOT GOOD.. I am trying like hell. Just would be a little bit easier if he wasnt so damn cute and if he did actually stop contacting me. Thanks... Link to post Share on other sites
tokyo Posted November 27, 2004 Share Posted November 27, 2004 Ok, he may be cute, but look beyond his cuteness. Ask yourself if you would want your mom or daughter to spend her time with this guy. Would you want your best friend to date this man? Simply tell him you are not interested in one-night stands and that he better stop contacting you. I guess, it´s just a physical thing and this can be hard (ahem... ), but once you´re out of it you will feel much better and then you are in control of the situation and then usually you won´t be interested anymore. Your situation is crappy and when you continue to see him you are letting him use you. That´s not what you want, isn´t it? He wants you, but not for a relationship. And even if he started a relationship with you, do you really think this is a good guy?? If he calls, hang up. If he plans a date, lie and say you are busy. Look for someone else. With no doubt he is not a nice person. Link to post Share on other sites
LalaGirl Posted November 27, 2004 Share Posted November 27, 2004 Originally posted by kooky Ask yourself if you would want your mom or daughter to spend her time with this guy. Would you want your best friend to date this man? Kooky is right, this is a motto we could all learn to live by. Baby, he's a player. He may actually care about you but not enough to truly make a difference. He cares about you as a teenage boy cares about his Playstation.... something interesting to pass the time. I know he's a hottie and you feel some sort of connection, but look yourself in the eye and ask "How long should I wait for him to give a sh**" You WILL look back at this some day and roll your eyes. You can only get to the finish line if you start the running. Link to post Share on other sites
Author overseas2004 Posted November 28, 2004 Author Share Posted November 28, 2004 I read the rules and though I dont buy into them one hundred percent there is some words of wisdom there. I have known that this is going nowhere. I got that part figured out somewhere in October. I stopped calling him when one of our dates consisted of driving back together from each others seperate weekends. My problem is that everytime he writes or calls and its not often but we have already been out like 10 times or more, my heart jumps and I really want to see him. At those times I figure to myself I am charming and quite attractive... I can make it click with him. I can make him see who I am and he will.... not be able to forget me. To a certain degree it works because he keeps coming back. But then last weekend I screwed up and slept with him. The reality is that I know that I cant change anything but I havent been able to bring my spirit under control or my heart or whatever it is that makes me want him so much. Jeez even his smell makes me jumpy... I have got it really bad. Well I guess on a brighter note... I never answered his SMS so maybe I am making some progress. Now if he just didnt call anymore, I could handle it. If he does, how do I stop myself and that weak part of me. Link to post Share on other sites
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