mrspaceman Posted March 1, 2015 Share Posted March 1, 2015 I have never had this happen me. I was out with a girl and her girlfriend and after the show, we had fun time and all left the venue together, took public transport home and I split off from them as her girlfriend was staying at her place. She texted me 2 days later to ask how I was and if I made it home okay? As a guy, shouldn't I be the one to check if she got home safe? I would have done this, but I knew she would be fine because there was two of them together. What does this mean? Thoughts? Link to post Share on other sites
mammasita Posted March 1, 2015 Share Posted March 1, 2015 Um if you hadn't spoken in 2 days....she was apparently reaching out since you didn't take the initiative. You must not be into her. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
bu2002 Posted March 1, 2015 Share Posted March 1, 2015 It means she felt a reason to follow up with you two days later and likely was hoping you would've followed up with her. Since you didn't post anything else about the context of your relationship with this girl, it's hard to evaluate further what it means. Have you two been friends for years? Have you recently been hanging out every now and then? Was this the first time the two of you have hung out in a social setting? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted March 1, 2015 Share Posted March 1, 2015 I have never had this happen me. I was out with a girl and her girlfriend and after the show, we had fun time and all left the venue together, took public transport home and I split off from them as her girlfriend was staying at her place. She texted me 2 days later to ask how I was and if I made it home okay? As a guy, shouldn't I be the one to check if she got home safe? I would have done this, but I knew she would be fine because there was two of them together. What does this mean? Thoughts? her being with a friend was no excuse for you to not have taken the initiative on this, unless you really don't care one way or the other about her. I don't see someone caring if I got home safely to be a bad thing. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mrspaceman Posted March 1, 2015 Author Share Posted March 1, 2015 Um if you hadn't spoken in 2 days....she was apparently reaching out since you didn't take the initiative. You must not be into her. Well 1.5 days. My instinct tells me this is her way of reaching out to me too. So should I read this as a sign of interest? I am into her, I would not be writing on here if I was not. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mrspaceman Posted March 1, 2015 Author Share Posted March 1, 2015 her being with a friend was no excuse for you to not have taken the initiative on this, unless you really don't care one way or the other about her. This could be true, however they were almost at home when I split from them. I don't see someone caring if I got home safely to be a bad thing. Agreed. Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted March 1, 2015 Share Posted March 1, 2015 Well 1.5 days. My instinct tells me this is her way of reaching out to me too. So should I read this as a sign of interest? I am into her, I would not be writing on here if I was not. If you are into her then ask her out. This is your opportunity, if you let this go without acting on it, she may put straight you into the friendzone. Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted March 1, 2015 Share Posted March 1, 2015 This could be true, however they were almost at home when I split from them. and? They couldn't be assaulted outside of their apartment? Something couldn't have happened because of that? Link to post Share on other sites
Author mrspaceman Posted March 1, 2015 Author Share Posted March 1, 2015 It means she felt a reason to follow up with you two days later and likely was hoping you would've followed up with her. Since you didn't post anything else about the context of your relationship with this girl, it's hard to evaluate further what it means. Have you two been friends for years? Have you recently been hanging out every now and then? Was this the first time the two of you have hung out in a social setting? We met about a year ago through a mutual friend who was almost always with us when we hung out. In the past couple months we started hanging out every now and then, only once or twice was it just the two of us, which I would like to change. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mrspaceman Posted March 1, 2015 Author Share Posted March 1, 2015 and? They couldn't be assaulted outside of their apartment? Something couldn't have happened because of that? I get your point. I definitely care for her well being, but you made me realize that I should perhaps express this more, thanks for pointing that out. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted March 1, 2015 Share Posted March 1, 2015 Your sexism notwithstanding, yes she is into you. If you like her, contact her. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BikerAccnt Posted March 1, 2015 Share Posted March 1, 2015 We met about a year ago through a mutual friend who was almost always with us when we hung out. In the past couple months we started hanging out every now and then, only once or twice was it just the two of us, which I would like to change. ---------------------------------- Then you need to pick up the phone, call her - not text - thank her for checking in on you, and ask her out on a DATE. You need to say the word date, that way your intentions are clear. Especially since you've known each other a while in a non-dating relationship. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted March 1, 2015 Share Posted March 1, 2015 >>as a guy, shouldn't I be the one to check if she got home safe?<< ---------------------- Bingo! Would this revelation had come to you had she *not* texted you first asking you if YOU got home safe? Your above question is precisely why she texted what she did. She wanted YOU to think of it... But you didn't...not until SHE asked you first. Since you're into her....call her and ask her out again! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author mrspaceman Posted March 1, 2015 Author Share Posted March 1, 2015 If you are into her then ask her out. This is your opportunity, if you let this go without acting on it, she may put straight you into the friendzone. I agree. I saw this as her way of reaching out, I just wanted an outside opinion to confirm this. Thank you for all your responses and help! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author mrspaceman Posted March 1, 2015 Author Share Posted March 1, 2015 To everyone saying I should ask her out. I plan on it 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gary S Posted March 1, 2015 Share Posted March 1, 2015 If you want to know if she likes you, ask her out alone, one-on-one. Go for the first big kiss before the night is over. Link to post Share on other sites
fitnessfan365 Posted March 1, 2015 Share Posted March 1, 2015 Haha.. Girls make up stupid innocuous excuses to reach out all the time because they want you to set up the next date. I would have texted back "There's no need to make up excuses to talk to me sweetheart. ;-P When are you free to get together?" Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted March 1, 2015 Share Posted March 1, 2015 Well 1.5 days. My instinct tells me this is her way of reaching out to me too. So should I read this as a sign of interest? I am into her, I would not be writing on here if I was not. Yes. It's a sign of interest. She is into you. Ask her out ..but expect she might be a bit coy. That is the dating game and it's fun and why it's called a game. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted March 1, 2015 Share Posted March 1, 2015 Ask her out. If you wait any longer, you'll likely miss your chance. She's hinting that you've already taken too long. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted March 1, 2015 Share Posted March 1, 2015 I think it's good manners for the person who got taken out on a date to thank the man for a good time sometime the next day. If sex was involved, at least in the early stages, I think it's imperative for the man to reach out asap the next day and thank the woman for a good time, as well as for her to thank him for the evening out. I think making sure someone got home safely is more the purview of the man. So I agree she didn't hear from you and looked for any reason to reach out and see what's up. I realize nowadays that just a quick "Hope you got home safely" or "Thanks for a good time" can open up a floodgate of nonstop texting, so things are more complicated with those who feel every text requires another text. I can see why someone might avoid them for that reason alone, but it doesn't sound like that's what happened here. Always, guys, let a woman know you had a good time and be sure she got home safely. The latter will put a warm little feeling in her heart because it's a gesture of protection. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
crude Posted March 1, 2015 Share Posted March 1, 2015 Always, guys, let a woman know you had a good time and be sure she got home safely. The latter will put a warm little feeling in her heart because it's a gesture of protection. According to statistics, most victims of violence are male. I guess sexual stereotypes include the concept that men are bulletproof. I see nothing wrong with a female wondering if a man got home safely. It's amazing how people refuse to let go of sexist thinking. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mrspaceman Posted March 3, 2015 Author Share Posted March 3, 2015 Yes. It's a sign of interest. She is into you. Ask her out ..but expect she might be a bit coy. That is the dating game and it's fun and why it's called a game. Good call Gemma. Here is what happened... So I kept the conversation short, asked what her plans were for the weekend, she said had no big plans. Then I was direct and asked her out. She then responded later saying thanks, but she was celebrating one of her parent's birthday. with no counter offer for a date, which I read as a bad sign. I told her no problem, let me know when you are free so we can get together. Then later wrote back Ok. I guess she is not interested? Or is she being coy? As Gemma predicted, if so, why? This I do not understand. Do I need to respond her short message and keep the ball bouncing between us? I am thinking not and just leave it, to give her space. Link to post Share on other sites
LifeandPerseverance Posted March 3, 2015 Share Posted March 3, 2015 I have never had this happen me. I was out with a girl and her girlfriend and after the show, we had fun time and all left the venue together, took public transport home and I split off from them as her girlfriend was staying at her place. She texted me 2 days later to ask how I was and if I made it home okay? As a guy, shouldn't I be the one to check if she got home safe? I would have done this, but I knew she would be fine because there was two of them together. What does this mean? Thoughts? Uhhhhh it means she cares and wanted to make sure you were home safe? Link to post Share on other sites
WomenWubber Posted March 3, 2015 Share Posted March 3, 2015 Well 1.5 days. My instinct tells me this is her way of reaching out to me too. So should I read this as a sign of interest? I am into her, I would not be writing on here if I was not. So you would be contacting her if you're into some stranger on the net? *head explodes* Link to post Share on other sites
ascendotum Posted March 3, 2015 Share Posted March 3, 2015 and? They couldn't be assaulted outside of their apartment? Something couldn't have happened because of that? I think this is extreme unless they live in the rough part of town. If you have walked them to their car and they only lives a short drive away and has made the trip into town hundreds of times before day and night, then I think its a little weird to ask them did you manage to make it home. If on the very small chance something went wrong then there is the good chance they wont answer anyway and or they will call their family or bff or cops or roadside service for help. I'd follow up on them the next day. If they are traveling on public transport and then walking, then I would be inclined. Should the woman not also do the same for a guy? Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts