star801 Posted January 22, 2015 Share Posted January 22, 2015 Funny story, but I somehow proceeded to mess up the easiest thing ever! Friend from out of town came in to celebrate her sisters birthday and brought me to it for a little bit. I find out from my friend that her sister had developed a crush on me after meeting me once like a year ago. I assume my friend is drunk and kidding, so I pay no heed to her words that night. The next morning, I'm curious so I ask if she was serious, and turns out she was, so she gave me her sister's digits without me asking. The sister seems like a cool girl, so I say what the heck and we end up texting a bit. Meanwhile, I'm conversing with another friend who then gives me the advice that I should spice it up a bit, so on random friend's advice I end up joking that I heard the craziest rumor the other night. Naturally the sister asks what did I hear... and I end up spitting out that her sister mentioned that she had a crush on me awhile back. This was 2 days ago and the crickets are still going strong. I'm by no means trying to salvage this since this is clearly dead and now supremely awkward, but what are everyone's thoughts on this? I figured it would be elicit a response... of any kind. If someone joked about hearing that you liked them some time ago, would you be too embarrassed to respond? Weirded out? What would go on in your head? Just curious because now I feel like I might have embarassed her and if she mentions it to her sister/my friend, I'd feel like a jerk. FYI: Ultimately from the pool of friends I've mentioned this to, I've gotten a split of 40/60 saying it was fine and I shouldn't have brought that up, respectively. Link to post Share on other sites
RocketScientist Posted January 22, 2015 Share Posted January 22, 2015 if you like her... ask her out (shows you like her)... thats it, if she responds and says yes go out and have fun and dont bring it up again 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted January 22, 2015 Share Posted January 22, 2015 Arrogant move. Humiliating for her. I'd have given you crickets too. Now she has to assume you'll be assuming she's going to a easy and a pushover for you. So she's opted out, plus she's probably pissed at the sister, too. So for all those guys on this board who ask why women rarely make the first move, now you have it. It's the equivalent of fifth graders on the playground chiding "You liiike me, you liike me!" 10 Link to post Share on other sites
Author star801 Posted January 22, 2015 Author Share Posted January 22, 2015 When you put it that way... I can see that it was a really jerk move. Appreciate the candor. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Molly Hooper Posted January 22, 2015 Share Posted January 22, 2015 She's obviously not into you - or supremely shy to the umpteenth degree and is yelling at her sister for divulging the info. Everyone responds differently. If A guy I liked texted me that, I would see it as an opportunity to confess my interest - mainly because most guys wouldn't bring it up if they weren't interested themselves. If she is interested and went radio silent, she's probably just immature. But my bet is that she isn't interested and is too nice to say it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author star801 Posted January 22, 2015 Author Share Posted January 22, 2015 That's a valid point, but I figured that if she wasn't at all interested, then a simple, "No I'm not interested" or "Yes, but back a year ago" would've been the response. If she was interested then it would be some playful banter trying to deny it. Although, as someone else pointed out, she must be pretty ticked off, which I clearly didn't see coming. Link to post Share on other sites
SycamoreCircle Posted January 22, 2015 Share Posted January 22, 2015 Um, if you're 17, it matters. If you're 32, it's charming. All the people chewing you out are in Glee. You're in effect saying to the girl, "I like you, too." Nothing to feel bad about. You could send a follow up text that says, "Hey, sorry if that last text was awkward. I'd really like to hang out sometime." If nothing comes of that, forget it and move on. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author star801 Posted January 22, 2015 Author Share Posted January 22, 2015 What if you're turning 25 this year and she just turned 23? Do we average the two responses haha? Link to post Share on other sites
GG3 Posted January 22, 2015 Share Posted January 22, 2015 Best headline. Made me lol. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author star801 Posted January 22, 2015 Author Share Posted January 22, 2015 The headline took me longer to come up with than the content Link to post Share on other sites
EgoJoe Posted January 22, 2015 Share Posted January 22, 2015 If you're turning twenty five and she's turning twenty three do this. CALL HER and be straight up but confident. Pick up the phone and dial. If she doesn't answer leave a voicemail. Say something to the effect of, " I was trying to be funny because. I am really interested in taking you out for coffee and dinner. Call me!" Link to post Share on other sites
Author star801 Posted January 22, 2015 Author Share Posted January 22, 2015 Perhaps. It may be not worth it given the fact that I did send a follow-up to that, so the balls totally in her court until maybe next week if I still remember. Funny thing is on Saturday my friend (her sister) said she was giving me full permission to hook up with her sister. I thought it was funny since I don't know any friend of mine saying that, didn't know she was serious. Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted January 22, 2015 Share Posted January 22, 2015 Funny story, but I somehow proceeded to mess up the easiest thing ever! Friend from out of town came in to celebrate her sisters birthday and brought me to it for a little bit. I find out from my friend that her sister had developed a crush on me after meeting me once like a year ago. I assume my friend is drunk and kidding, so I pay no heed to her words that night. The next morning, I'm curious so I ask if she was serious, and turns out she was, so she gave me her sister's digits without me asking. The sister seems like a cool girl, so I say what the heck and we end up texting a bit. Meanwhile, I'm conversing with another friend who then gives me the advice that I should spice it up a bit, so on random friend's advice I end up joking that I heard the craziest rumor the other night. Naturally the sister asks what did I hear... and I end up spitting out that her sister mentioned that she had a crush on me awhile back. This was 2 days ago and the crickets are still going strong. I'm by no means trying to salvage this since this is clearly dead and now supremely awkward, but what are everyone's thoughts on this? I figured it would be elicit a response... of any kind. If someone joked about hearing that you liked them some time ago, would you be too embarrassed to respond? Weirded out? What would go on in your head? Just curious because now I feel like I might have embarassed her and if she mentions it to her sister/my friend, I'd feel like a jerk. FYI: Ultimately from the pool of friends I've mentioned this to, I've gotten a split of 40/60 saying it was fine and I shouldn't have brought that up, respectively. It really doesn't matter what anyone else thinks: she apparently didn't think it was cool and has acted accordingly. I imagine the next time you see her sister, she's not going to be very pleased with you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author star801 Posted January 23, 2015 Author Share Posted January 23, 2015 I don't quite get the second part, but the first I can see as it could be perceived as a pompous move. Ultimately, I think that the whole thing for me is that she thought it was random/weird and it clearly left a bad taste in her mouth... which is whatever since I never see her. I'm more worried about my relationship with my friend since it will be mildly embarrassing the next time I see her since she most definitely knows, but won't say anything about it (nor would I ask ask or ever bring it up), but I'm sure that it'll be fine and this will be something we joke about. I've been on the receiving end of some very weird texts from people I hardly knew too, and I always had the gall to respond, even if it was a one word brush off kind of answer which I figured a "no" response would've taken care of. Lesson learned for next time to take it slow and not be "Mr. Smooth." Link to post Share on other sites
Author star801 Posted January 28, 2015 Author Share Posted January 28, 2015 As a final update to wrap up this thread, the sister got in touch with me earlier today and explained that she was embarrassed and wasn't sure what to do since she was also just starting to see someone and wanted to see where that would lead. It's so new that her sister (my friend) doesn't know yet, hence why my friend had egged me on and given me her "permission to hook up with her sister." This has been an interesting experience, to say the least. Later dudes and thanks for all of the different perspectives! Link to post Share on other sites
mightycpa Posted January 28, 2015 Share Posted January 28, 2015 So what I was going to ask you is how come you don't have a crush on me anymore? Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted January 28, 2015 Share Posted January 28, 2015 Arrogant move. Humiliating for her. I'd have given you crickets too. Now she has to assume you'll be assuming she's going to a easy and a pushover for you. So she's opted out, plus she's probably pissed at the sister, too. So for all those guys on this board who ask why women rarely make the first move, now you have it. It's the equivalent of fifth graders on the playground chiding "You liiike me, you liike me!" totally agree with this.....its not mature at all to bring it up..and it is a reason why some women hang back on asking out a guy ...crushes are normally hidden for a reason....if it were me i would be wondering am i about to be humiliated for liking a guy...and yes i would be pissed at a sister who told... an apology maybe for her saying sorry you mentioned it when what you really wanted to do was ask her out....be honest....and then ask her out straight up.....dont mention the crush thing again it puts her on the back foot with you...admit you like her..........deb Link to post Share on other sites
MissBee Posted January 28, 2015 Share Posted January 28, 2015 Funny story, but I somehow proceeded to mess up the easiest thing ever! Friend from out of town came in to celebrate her sisters birthday and brought me to it for a little bit. I find out from my friend that her sister had developed a crush on me after meeting me once like a year ago. I assume my friend is drunk and kidding, so I pay no heed to her words that night. The next morning, I'm curious so I ask if she was serious, and turns out she was, so she gave me her sister's digits without me asking. The sister seems like a cool girl, so I say what the heck and we end up texting a bit. Meanwhile, I'm conversing with another friend who then gives me the advice that I should spice it up a bit, so on random friend's advice I end up joking that I heard the craziest rumor the other night. Naturally the sister asks what did I hear... and I end up spitting out that her sister mentioned that she had a crush on me awhile back. This was 2 days ago and the crickets are still going strong. I'm by no means trying to salvage this since this is clearly dead and now supremely awkward, but what are everyone's thoughts on this? I figured it would be elicit a response... of any kind. If someone joked about hearing that you liked them some time ago, would you be too embarrassed to respond? Weirded out? What would go on in your head? Just curious because now I feel like I might have embarassed her and if she mentions it to her sister/my friend, I'd feel like a jerk. FYI: Ultimately from the pool of friends I've mentioned this to, I've gotten a split of 40/60 saying it was fine and I shouldn't have brought that up, respectively. If I actually liked the guy I'd be sort of relieved he knew and would probably respond with something witty. Also, why does she think you're texting her? If a guy I liked who I didn't give my number to somehow got it and started texting me I'd assume it was because he liked me and so I'd not feel that shy about him bringing up the crush. On the other hand, she may not know how you feel about her if you've not said so and then you saying she has the crush may put her on the spot and embarrass her since you haven't laid out your cards so to speak. It is possible that she read it as you gloating but not feeling the same. Link to post Share on other sites
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