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She acts like she likes me but constantly pushes me away


Kaiten

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When a girl acts like she likes you in person but almost always pushes you away when you try to see her should you just give up?

 

Actually, this girl Im talking about ... We used to like each other but i (inadvertently) hurt her feelings pretty badly. And so things looked like she hated me so I stopped talking to her. Then outta the blue she started talking to me like nothing was wrong and so we started talking like friends again.

 

But then i started getting this vibe that she really liked me (along with other people telling me that she liked me but she didnt like that she liked me). So whenever I try to talk to her its like pulling teeth.

 

Im constantly getting pushed away. Should I just give up or is it worth it to try and talk things out?

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I know you said it's like nothing ever went wrong between you but could she be harbouring grudges?

 

If she's blowing you off when you try to talk to her in person that is NOT a good sign.

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Thegreatestthing

Sometimes girls protect themselves from a liability,maybe you give off the vibes of not being the best for them,sometimes we do it because we don't want the emotional investment,and other times because we just don't like the person,

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I know you said it's like nothing ever went wrong between you but could she be harbouring grudges?

 

If she's blowing you off when you try to talk to her in person that is NOT a good sign.

 

 

I guess it's possible she held a grudge? That's what it feels like deep down to me, but I could be wrong. I just found out last night that she has never even had a bf before.

 

But she doesn't blow me off in person at all. Actually, she's extremely inviting in person. Which is why I got so confused. She would smile at me constantly and we would look at each other the whole time.

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Sometimes girls protect themselves from a liability,maybe you give off the vibes of not being the best for them,sometimes we do it because we don't want the emotional investment,and other times because we just don't like the person,

 

I feel like you are pretty close here.

 

We live in the south and I go to a church. So that means Southern Baptist culture. Which I hate, but love God, so I don't let it get to me too much. Nevertheless, she is white and I am black. But she was raised in a different country and moved here a few years ago so I'm not sure how much Southern Baptist culture has influenced her yet.

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OP you describe trying to talk to her as 'like pulling teeth,' or tellingly, that you're 'constantly getting pushed away.'

 

Does this not sound like she's blowing you off?

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Yeah. Actually we were just talking a second ago through text. She told me "Please give up"

 

That is the most crushing thing I've heard from a girl, I think, in my entire life.

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Ouch.

 

Seems she was playing a bit of an ego game with you, that stupid push/pull, come here go away game.

 

Well, she was blunt with her words.

 

So, give up. There's no point at all of making small chit chat with her ever again, she's not a friend at all. She never reached out or communicated with you, she shut you out and held a grudge. Not a good personality type or nice quality to have.

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Sometimes women are friendly in person because they are afraid not to be friendly and wouldn't want to deal with consequences if they were rude. Same way girls make something up rather than being truthful why they won't go out or break up with you. Don't want to hurt your feelings or are intimidated.

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Ouch.

 

Seems she was playing a bit of an ego game with you, that stupid push/pull, come here go away game.

 

Well, she was blunt with her words.

 

So, give up. There's no point at all of making small chit chat with her ever again, she's not a friend at all. She never reached out or communicated with you, she shut you out and held a grudge. Not a good personality type or nice quality to have.

 

I agree to a point ^^....

 

Look, some things can't be fixed. Your first shot at her you jacked it up. Now trying to repair it just ain't working. Remember this so you don't make the same mistake next time.

 

I wouldn't say she's "holding a grudge". I say she probably 'forgave, but won't forget'. When someone shows you who they are, remember it, cuz they rarely change. You treated her badly, why should she let you hurt her again?

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I was clinging to hope because people kept telling me "No dude, I'm telling you she likes you! She likes you, she just doesn't want a relationship right now. I talked with her mom, you should have heard what she says about you"

 

And I fell for it because it was what I wanted to believe despite all the evidence to the contrary.

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deathandtaxes
I was clinging to hope because people kept telling me "No dude, I'm telling you she likes you! She likes you, she just doesn't want a relationship right now. I talked with her mom, you should have heard what she says about you"

 

And I fell for it because it was what I wanted to believe despite all the evidence to the contrary.

 

 

 

Have you even asked this lady out? you'd have your answer right away and wouldn't have to worry about it come posting here about it.

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Have you even asked this lady out? you'd have your answer right away and wouldn't have to worry about it come posting here about it.

or other things

aM

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Anytime it is unclear about a woman's intentions toward you or as soon as you become frustrated with the situation, drop it and move on.

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