FWB situations

[RachR88]

I dated a man I met on a dating app. We got on really well, had a lot in common, had fun etc. but in both our minds it was always a casual thing. To cut a long story short, misinterpretation over messages meant that he got the impression I was wanting more than just a casual relationship with him, and when I tried to rectify it what I said just made things worse (I’m not good at getting my point across clearly over messages!).

 

 

We haven’t spoken for almost 2 weeks now, but he’s one of the only men I’ve felt comfortable to actually meet in person and the only one I’ve slept with since dating again. As soon as you mention to men that you don’t want anything serious right now it becomes a bit odd and creepy, and I don’t want to be in a situation where I feel like I’m sleeping around.

 

 

Basically I need to know is it too late to make things clear with him after not speaking for this long? And will suggesting a FWB type of situation to him just make me seem sleazy, or even desperate, now?

[PegNosePete]

It depends what he wants, really. If he wants FWB too then what right would he have to think you're sleazy or desperate if he wants the same thing? And if he wants a relationship then you've got different goals anyway so what does it matter what he thinks of you?

 

In short what do you have to lose?

[Redhead14]

I dated a man I met on a dating app. We got on really well, had a lot in common, had fun etc. but in both our minds it was always a casual thing. To cut a long story short, misinterpretation over messages meant that he got the impression I was wanting more than just a casual relationship with him, and when I tried to rectify it what I said just made things worse (I’m not good at getting my point across clearly over messages!).

 

 

We haven’t spoken for almost 2 weeks now, but he’s one of the only men I’ve felt comfortable to actually meet in person and the only one I’ve slept with since dating again. As soon as you mention to men that you don’t want anything serious right now it becomes a bit odd and creepy, and I don’t want to be in a situation where I feel like I’m sleeping around.

 

 

Basically I need to know is it too late to make things clear with him after not speaking for this long? And will suggesting a FWB type of situation to him just make me seem sleazy, or even desperate, now?

 

It's been two weeks. He hasn't contacted you. I'd leave it alone. It is usually better to ferret out what a man wants before you say what you're looking for if you can. Give it some time when you first start dating a man, see how/if he comes to you. Don't sleep with them right away and when you do, then you be clear about what you're looking for.

 

I'd say this man was looking for a relationship and didn't want to be FWB. And, yes, that conversation is always a little strange, but timing is everything.

[stillafool]

I see no reason to reach out to him since you both want different things. Him wanting a relationship is not going to change and your not wanting one is not going to change. You would be better off trying to find another man who only wants to be a FWB.