Girl dropped me like bricks of stone!

[hawx79]

I had 2 dates with her. The first went great and it was very special, I already felt in love with her. On the 2nd she didn't show interest at all and she gave me signs she never wants to see me again.

I tried to be nice as I could but I forced her little to come out on the 2nd date while she wasn't in the mood and now I feel I messed it all up!

So im not contacting her anymore for a while but I miss her everyday and I feel heartbroken.

She knows me to forget about her and that is what hurts me the most.

I had been needy, can i still fix it? I liked her so much but i scared and frustrated her.

Edited November 24, 2014 by hawx79

[Omei]

You hardly know her how are you this attached?

 

Hopefully you didn't come off that strongly

 

No if she gave you all those signals then yet wishes are clear leave her be.

 

If you're this heartbroken after two dates I fear what you would be like if someone broke up with you, need to work on your cool and acceptance of things if they don't end up being a match because it will happen a lot, it does to all of us.

[hawx79]

You hardly know her how are you this attached?

 

Hopefully you didn't come off that strongly

 

No if she gave you all those signals then yet wishes are clear leave her be.

 

If you're this heartbroken after two dates I fear what you would be like if someone broke up with you, need to work on your cool and acceptance of things if they don't end up being a match because it will happen a lot, it does to all of us.

 

The reason I got so attached to her is because she was my "almost 1st girlfriend" and im already 35!!! I started too late on this thing they call dating to find someone to share your life with!

[Maleficent]

That's no excuse OP.

 

You were not dropped like a ton of stones. You had two dates and she wasn't that into you.

 

Now shake it off and do it all over and over and over again because that's what dating is all about.

[hawx79]

That's no excuse OP.

 

You were not dropped like a ton of stones. You had two dates and she wasn't that into you.

 

Now shake it off and do it all over and over and over again because that's what dating is all about.

 

On the 1date she really liked me and she gave me her phone number too.

[Maleficent]

On the 1date she really liked me and she gave me her phone number too.

 

That's still no indication she wants to have a relationship with you. It just means she wants to get to know you better.

[elaine567]

On the 1date she really liked me and she gave me her phone number too.

 

If she really liked you as dating material, you would not be in this position now. You need to learn the signs and learn how to act around women.

If you "scared and frustrated" her then you need to work on your social skills.

 

How come you are 35 and on your first date, if that isn't too personal a question?

[hawx79]

If she really liked you as dating material, you would not be in this position now. You need to learn the signs and learn how to act around women.

If you "scared and frustrated" her then you need to work on your social skills.

 

How come you are 35 and on your first date, if that isn't too personal a question?

 

 

Thx for your advice but I have decided to keep pursuing her untill she yells at me!

There is nothing I would not do for her.

I never had been open for relationships and I even hated women for years because of bad experiences with them, but now I'm willing to turn it all around.

[mammasita]

One date and she was almost your girlfriend? I'd be scared too.

 

Take a step back and sloooooooow way down. Age is irrelevant, I think you might be too eager and scaring these girls.

[elaine567]

Thx for your advice but I have decided to keep pursuing her untill she yells at me!

There is nothing I would not do for her.

I never had been open for relationships and I even hated women for years because of bad experiences with them, but now I'm willing to turn it all around.

 

For God's sake listen to the woman, why would you pursue someone who acts like this.

On the 2nd she didn't show interest at all and she gave me signs she never wants to see me again.

[mammasita]

Thx for your advice but I have decided to keep pursuing her untill she yells at me!

There is nothing I would not do for her.

I never had been open for relationships and I even hated women for years because of bad experiences with them, but now I'm willing to turn it all around.

 

Stalking is a crime my friend.

[hawx79]

Stalking is a crime my friend.

I'm not! It has been almost 2 weeks I last seen her and gonna wait 2 weeks more before I contact her again. Im just letting her know every know and then that I still think if her.

[Brooke02]

You felt like you were in love with her on the first date!?

[preraph]

Everyone runs from someone who acts like they're in love when they can't possible be and here's why. Because you don't even know her and she knows you don't even know her and yet you are so desperate and so deluded and want to be in love so badly that you are in love with love. She knows you don't even know her and she knows you're acting like you're in love and way too invested after one casual date, and so she knows you're in love with an image in your head and trying to make her fit into your ideal image that you can be in love with. She knows it's all just delusion on your part. No one will go along with that. And since it's obsessive, they will and should flee. And if you keep pursuing her after she's said no, then yes, you are stalking and harassing. And it will not make her like you. It will make her hate you because it's an invasion of privacy and a huge sign of not respecting her wishes and that she is entitled to not like you back.

[hawx79]

Everyone runs from someone who acts like they're in love when they can't possible be and here's why. Because you don't even know her and she knows you don't even know her and yet you are so desperate and so deluded and want to be in love so badly that you are in love with love. She knows you don't even know her and she knows you're acting like you're in love and way too invested after one casual date, and so she knows you're in love with an image in your head and trying to make her fit into your ideal image that you can be in love with. She knows it's all just delusion on your part. No one will go along with that. And since it's obsessive, they will and should flee. And if you keep pursuing her after she's said no, then yes, you are stalking and harassing. And it will not make her like you. It will make her hate you because it's an invasion of privacy and a huge sign of not respecting her wishes and that she is entitled to not like you back.

 

 

There is no doubt in my heart that I love her because no girl has ever put such happiness in me when I was with her on the first date.

She hasn't technically said no yet so I will persist as it will be her loss, I can offer her so much. You see, she is a single mom with a troublesome life, if she knows what best for her she would accept me in her life!

[d0nnivain]

There is no doubt in my heart that I love her because no girl has ever put such happiness in me when I was with her on the first date.

She hasn't technically said no yet so I will persist as it will be her loss, I can offer her so much. You see, she is a single mom with a troublesome life, if she knows what best for her she would accept me in her life!

 

Oh boy. You are trying to apply logic to one of the least logical human emotions: love.

 

It doesn't work that way. It's about chemistry. It's intangible not concrete.

 

If you started talking about love after two dates of course she is running screaming. It's too much too fast. Back off. Listen to preraph. Pursuing her when she is lukewarm at best & more probably uninterested will make her hate you, not love you.

 

If you can manage to talk to her, apologize for coming on too strong. get her to accept a low key invitation like a movie. Do not tell her you love her. Do not even tell her you like her. Do not offer her a solution to what you see has her problem. Simply spend time with her. Listen more than you talk & let her come to you. If you can't do that, this will never work because you are pressing for too much too soon & it's creepy

[hawx79]

If you can manage to talk to her, apologize for coming on too strong. get her to accept a low key invitation like a movie. Do not tell her you love her. Do not even tell her you like her. Do not offer her a solution to what you see has her problem. Simply spend time with her. Listen more than you talk & let her come to you. If you can't do that, this will never work because you are pressing for too much too soon & it's creepy

Ok I want to take your advice but she is slipping away from me, so i wanted to tell her that i can offer her and her son a better life already when call her cause maybe I wont be getting a third date anymore.

[hawx79]

If you can manage to talk to her, apologize for coming on too strong. get her to accept a low key invitation like a movie. Do not tell her you love her. Do not even tell her you like her. Do not offer her a solution to what you see has her problem. Simply spend time with her. Listen more than you talk & let her come to you. If you can't do that, this will never work because you are pressing for too much too soon & it's creepy

Ok I want to take your advice but she is slipping away from me, so i wanted to tell her that i can offer her and her son a better life already when I call her cause maybe I wont be getting a third date anymore.

[InsaneTrombone]

Is this thread serious?

[preraph]

You don't even know her. The love you feel, you are just projecting it onto her. You love who you hope she is. She is not that person. The love you feel comes within you and is not coming from her to you in any way. No one is going to take you up on your offer because they will view anyone making such an offer after seeing them once and then reluctantly twice and then being blown off as being crazy! You surely can look around and see that desperation is not attractive and you surely have seen enough to know that just because you are feeling something for someone has absolutely nothing to do with whether they feel anything for you. Love isn't "meant to be." Just because you think you love someone you barely have met doesn't mean you are predestined to be with that person. Everyone has crushes on people who don't give a hoot back during their lifetime.

[Brooke02]

OP, you asked if you could fix this because you were being needy.

 

This IS NOT going to fix it...at all.

[hawx79]

The love I feel is also the feeling she gives me, on the first date she liked me back and I never experienced that. You haven't seen the side of her that I've seen so don't tell me I don't know her!

So I should forget her? How can I show or tell her how much she means to me without being creepy then?

[lollipopspot]

The way you are feeling would scare the heck out of most any woman.

 

I liked her so much but i scared and frustrated her.

 

You need to stop scaring her with your intensity, if you have any hope whatsoever with her.

 

There is nothing I would not do for her.

I never had been open for relationships and I even hated women for years because of bad experiences with them, but now I'm willing to turn it all around.

 

That is way too much energy to put on one woman you have met twice.

 

if she knows what best for her she would accept me in her life!

 

This is scary because you really don't know what is best for her after 2 dates. You can't know. You don't know her well enough. And SHE gets to decide what is best for her.

 

You really need to think about how you're coming across. If I were her, I would be scared that I had a stalker on my hands, and want to distance myself too. If you are this attached this quickly, imagine how you would be after 4 dates. It sounds like you'd never let her go, and you're already deciding that you know what's best for her.

 

Heed the posters here. I think it is unanimous that you are approaching women in a way that will not be successful. You do need to work on yourself. Don't lose hope - this can be done - but you need desperately to change your approach and energy towards women.

[hawx79]

The way you are feeling would scare the heck out of most any woman.

 

 

 

You need to stop scaring her with your intensity, if you have any hope whatsoever with her.

 

 

 

That is way too much energy to put on one woman you have met twice.

 

 

 

This is scary because you really don't know what is best for her after 2 dates. You can't know. You don't know her well enough. And SHE gets to decide what is best for her.

 

You really need to think about how you're coming across. If I were her, I would be scared that I had a stalker on my hands, and want to distance myself too. If you are this attached this quickly, imagine how you would be after 4 dates. It sounds like you'd never let her go, and you're already deciding that you know what's best for her.

 

Heed the posters here. I think it is unanimous that you are approaching women in a way that will not be successful. You do need to work on yourself. Don't lose hope - this can be done - but you need desperately to change your approach and energy towards women.

I've always thought I'm happy being alone as I've done everything alone from travelling to having been living alone for many years, but in really im a very lonely person who is aching to have someone in his life.

 

 

But women like persisting men? And according to dating coach Julian Blanc, you should not let a rejection blow you out off the field. A no actually means not right now. Because women secretly admire men who keep on going for what they want.

[TigerLilly78]

There is no doubt in my heart that I love her because no girl has ever put such happiness in me when I was with her on the first date.

She hasn't technically said no yet so I will persist as it will be her loss, I can offer her so much. You see, she is a single mom with a troublesome life, if she knows what best for her she would accept me in her life!

Holey moley.....really? im preying this is a troll....