I'm 20 and attracted to teen girls, is that bad? :/

[Sagittarius]

I'm 20 and I'm still attracted to teen girls. Not 13-15. Like 16-19. I know morally it is wrong, I have always been shy and havent dated much, never really had many friends, never got to really hang out with girls when i was in school. I havent dated since I was 17, and it was with a 22 year old. Is it bad that im still very attracted to teen girls? I'm attracted to girls my age and older, but...ugh. Do I need mental health..is something wrong with me. I dont think its a problem since I even look 16, but...i just dont want to seem like a creeper, there are some feelings and emotions i cant control. id never try to rape or molest a teen girl...i wish i could have had the teenage life i wanted...everyone else around me got to have friends in school and when i was in school i always sat alone at lunch and just listened to my music and barely talked to anyone

 

someone please help should i see a therapist?

[Omei]

No you're fine it will seem less and less weird as you get older like im 28 and id prob date someone five years younger than me if I thought we would work most guys I check out are usually young looking, I like them younger so do you it doesn't make you weird and you don't need help. People tell me I look 22 ish younger than I am so it never looks weird you said you also looked young.

[preraph]

No, you're not a creeper. Now, if you reach 25 or so and you're still mainly attracted to 16 year olds, time to have a look at yourself. But although illegal, 16 is only 4 years younger than you. However, you need to leave all the ones under 18 or your state's legal age alone. You have to understand something. Of course, everyone thinks young girls are pretty and you know how it is just out looking around, you are going mainly by physical looks. But the difference comes in because there is a world of difference in the maturity of a 16 year old girl and even a 19 year old guy. Those differences vary of course. Like if the 19 year old guy is still living at home with the parents, maybe there isn't ALL that much maturity difference, but a guy who's been to college and is working and making himself a living, etc., that's a big difference. 16 can't really even fathom all that responsibility and freedom yet.

 

Also, brains don't fully mature until mid-20s, and the younger, the less developed, and one area that is underdeveloped is the area which enables teens to fully comprehend the results of their actions. This is why you see so many teen pregnancies and why everyone is so adamantly against it. They literally cannot comprehend what parenthood entails. Because of this, of course, you certainly should never have sex with anyone underaged or have sex without birth control and not be depending on anyone in their teens to even understand and have the ability to see to their own birth control. There are so many misconceptions out there that young girls and guys believe, but even more dangerous than that is that because they can't foresee or comprehend consequences, they can't even fathom that it could possibly happen to them. Same reason I drove like a bat out of hell at that age. No comprehension how easy it is to get in a bad car wreck.

 

And as you know, it's illegal for you to be sexual with anyone under 18 (if you're in the US, check your state law to be sure, but that' seems to be the common age). Now, of course, there is this hinterland like when I was in high school many decades ago where sophomores mainly dated senior guys. I understand this is totally frowned on now, but it was the norm then because women seemed to mature a bit faster and guys their age seemed like their little brothers. So say you're a senior and 17 and dating a 15 year old. Then you're still dating a year later, and suddenly what was legal now isn't and you're 18 dating an underaged 16 year old. As long as you don't have intercourse and that is the circumstance, of course many parents give their consent.

 

The whole key is do not ever have sex with an underaged girl or even close. Learn your state law and just stick with the ones over 18 if that is what the age is. It's certainly not creepy for you at 20 to date an 18 year old girl. It's illegal for you to go lower, and there's no real reason to so just don't. If there's one you actually know and like, we'll she'll be legal in a couple of years and if it is meant to be, she'll keep. You'll get in a lot less drama and the girl won't be as flaky and things will be safer and more stable overall once she's out of the teen years.

 

And in case you wonder why parents are so adamant you not date their young daughter when you're 19, 20, and up, a lot of it has to do with these are your peak sexuality years when you will be very focused on finding and having sex. No one wants their teen daughter, who hasn't developed enough social skills and confidence to maybe say "no" firmly alone and can't think ahead of consequences, to be worn down and influenced by guys they know are not thinking with their brains.

Edited November 22, 2014 by preraph

[OwMyEyeball]

Well, not all guys are raised to precisely demarcate their sexual attraction towards a woman based on clear understanding of the number of times the Earth has rotated around the sun since her day of birth.

 

Rule of thumb goes age divided 2 plus 7. Keep that in mind.

[jcrew11]

I think 17 is the age of consent in most states. I don't know how date is different than 18, but I guess at 18 they are independent, and at 17, their parents can complain to the police.

[Coe]

I'm still attracted to teen girls at 30... Obviously only 16-19 but I prefer a girl that can go out for a drink so 18 is my limit. They seem to be attracted to me but possibly because I look a bit younger but don't act it.

[ForbiddenFruit]

Society thinks it is morally wrong, but then again society rules are created by the old and boring(; So No, there is nothing wrong with you, age isn't anything but a number. I am 20 and extremely attracted to my 32 year old college professor. If age mattered we would all be crazy and in need of therapists. (:

[Evening]

No, its not wrong. I like guys between 17-19. Mostly they are the ones who I can communicate very easily with.

[Diezel]

I'm 20 and I'm still attracted to teen girls. Not 13-15. Like 16-19. I know morally it is wrong

 

Correction, morally it is NOT wrong.

 

LEGALLY, in some places, it can be wrong.

 

Two different things.

[d0nnivain]

Since you seem to have your wits about you, knowing your own tastes / preferences, be careful & try to limit yourself to the women who are of legal age.