To date or not to date; the girl your friends are chasing

[Tik]

There's this girl; she buries her face into my chest at times, we hug and are touchy-feely (although I am naturally like that with everyone). I can come up to her, initiate nothing and she'll put her shoulder around me or like the other day when I hadn't said hi to her, come from behind and give me a massage as I tickled her.

 

Now here is the conundrum. I have a friend that has been chasing her for the last 10 months. Even I was gunning for him at some point but from word around, he is still friend-zoned badly even if they spend a significant amount of time together. We're all part of a big social group at university. Heck, another guy friend from our social group is also in love with this chick but says he won't make a move in case of upsetting the said guy.

 

I on the other hand flirt and tease with everyone and hence I think is why she was drawn to me as most guys keep their distance around her. Now I am starting to be interested in her but don't know if I should make a move or not. I mean the other day I was play fighting with her and I could see that both guys looked uncomfortable about it with the guy who's been chasing her all this time giving me the stink eye/ change in body language. The boys know I'm good with woman so half the time I'm just seen as the fun guy and think nothing of it.

 

Will the dynamics of the group change? Will drama follow regardless? I mean I'm not part part of the group i.e. invited to social events but we don't hang out simply to hang out. I do like her and she's a quality chick; nice and inexperienced but which is why I think the guys have gone about things wrong treating her too nicely when one has to do the opposite. I further hold a position of representation at university. Will my rep be judged should I end up dating her? I'm not after a quick fling if that is what one thinks.

 

Cheers guys.

[Blakely]

I personally wouldn't if it were a close friend, somebody I hangout with on the regular. But it doesn't sound like that's the case here.

 

It's called fate. If its meant to be, it'll happen. If you feel like you have a good chance with the girl, go for it. If you feel she's worth it even if you may possibly hurting others along the way. They will eventually move on and get over. Probably won't trust you or ever really consider you a true friend. But it's free world right? I say go for it, just don't flaunt her around at first.

[preraph]

I'm not sure you're such a close friend that you have a duty to get out of the way if you're sure she's aware of his luuuv and isn't interested. You're liable to get in a fight about it, though, so be sure this girl is worth it. She may be a big tease and only falling on you to show the guy she isn't interested in him. You never know. If you were a closer friend, I'd say maybe you tell the guy it's time for him to make a move if he's going to. He may have already been shot down or not. Sounds to me like he's hoping she'll jump on him and she's not doing it. If any of those guys were his real friend they'd tell him to ask her out on a proper date and try to kiss her and be done with it and that he's not going to grow on her but only entrench himself more in friendship.

 

But here's something to consider. You say they hang out a lot together. So if you start dating her and she keeps hanging out with him, and she will if she considers him a friend, how are you going to manage that?

 

Is it really worth the trouble with so many other girls around?