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Do all women want romance and sex this quickly?


Eddy Street

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The first woman I ever dated was touching me, making me touch her and asking me to spend the night the second time we hung out. Same thing with the woman I met on match who claimed she was interested in friendship, second date she was flirting with me hard. Another girl started talking about sex on the first date. Should I just stop being so worried about not hurting people or respecting women and just play along with it?

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acrosstheuniverse

Just play it by ear. If you don't mind casual sex and a woman initiates it then why wouldn't you go for it? Everyone's boundaries on when they are ready for sexual intimacy are different.

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First of all, respect yourself. You can then respect others in the way they wish to be respected. You are confusing lack of sexual activity with being respectable, and that is not true in modern society and thinking. This is no longer the 1940s.

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No, not all of us do. If it makes you uncomfortable and you want someone who moves slower there are definitely women who also wait to get to know you more before sex, so just go with what feels right for you.

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OF COURSE they want sex, maybe more than men want. Because they have a hard time finding a strong, dominant, non-loser, non-clingy etc. etc. man and they have to deal with men who would judge them for having sex too quickly, men just want to **** them without building rapport or something, men would kiss and tell,.. Anyway always assume that they want sex badly, because if you think otherwise you may not make your move at the right time and their attraction may expire.. At least that's what i've been through, i just waited too much to get physical and/or making her know what i felt and ended up in friendzone. A couple times. So shortly, make your move. And, in dating sites, i think 'just looking for friends' is total bullcrap and it says that the girl just wants something casual.

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Do all women want romance and sex this quickly?

 

Based on your description and my life experience, I'd opine 'no' but here's something I learned from a MW decades ago. She said, and remember she was married at the time, 'I use sex to get men to like me'. IME, she, and other MW's I met like her, indeed were very successful in getting men to like them, not just for sex but also for more transactional things. It worked! Does it seem unhealthy? To some, yes it does. However, one can only live one's own life so one does what feels right to them and one can change their mind at any time.

 

IMO, as far as your response, you do what you do.

 

Myself, I didn't see sex as a transactional behavior so maybe that particular MW got the better end of the deal. She didn't need to use sex for me to like her. I just liked her. That's how life goes sometimes!

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The first woman I ever dated was touching me, making me touch her and asking me to spend the night the second time we hung out. Same thing with the woman I met on match who claimed she was interested in friendship, second date she was flirting with me hard. Another girl started talking about sex on the first date. Should I just stop being so worried about not hurting people or respecting women and just play along with it?

 

I don't know how young or old you are, but that is besides the point. I can tell you that am a touchy / hugger man, and I do warn my dates before hand. I have met women who the same, and we just offset each other :D

 

If opportunity to get to 3rd base presents itself on 1st date....TAKE IT. If you don't, you might never get a chance to even get to 2nd base.

 

Sometimes people just click after meeting for the first time, and you can't help it if the feeling is mutual. That being said though, I'll always treat the situation with dignity i.e. act as a gentleman regardless :love:

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I think the main reason is women are so indoctrinated that all guys want is sex that many go ahead and offer that up. But it's also true women also need sex. The problem lies for women in the double standard. If men want sex, there's not nearly as much judging as with a woman who is ready to get laid. But women do more often than not also want a real relationship and some men still have that double standard that if she wants sex right away, she's not marraige/relationship material, which I have to tell you is complete B.S.

 

I think if a woman only wants a hookup, they are usually really blatant about it and start letting you know it's no strings right away. I also think those women are very rare and that most women aren't just looking for a one-nighter.

 

No one should judge a woman if she goes ahead and has sex with a man. It either means she thinks you expect it and will go away if she doesn't, as is so obviously the attitude with online dating, or it means she has a genuine sexual appetite and that's a good thing.

 

Not saying you were judging, OP. In your case, you are more taking the role of a more prudent person who has the discipline and forethought to take things slow. This has become so rare in men these days that my suggestion is that you tell a woman that up front before you ever even go out. Just tell her, you know, I like to spend some time getting to know a woman before I sleep with them. And yes, use the words "sleep with" rather than something vague like "take it to the next level," which could mean anything. I really think if you do this you will find most women very pleased by it. Not many women mind if they get stuck in the kissing phase for an extended period of time.

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I think the main reason is women are so indoctrinated that all guys want is sex that many go ahead and offer that up. But it's also true women also need sex. The problem lies for women in the double standard. If men want sex, there's not nearly as much judging as with a woman who is ready to get laid. But women do more often than not also want a real relationship and some men still have that double standard that if she wants sex right away, she's not marraige/relationship material, which I have to tell you is complete B.S.

 

I think if a woman only wants a hookup, they are usually really blatant about it and start letting you know it's no strings right away. I also think those women are very rare and that most women aren't just looking for a one-nighter.

 

No one should judge a woman if she goes ahead and has sex with a man. It either means she thinks you expect it and will go away if she doesn't, as is so obviously the attitude with online dating, or it means she has a genuine sexual appetite and that's a good thing.

 

Not saying you were judging, OP. In your case, you are more taking the role of a more prudent person who has the discipline and forethought to take things slow. This has become so rare in men these days that my suggestion is that you tell a woman that up front before you ever even go out. Just tell her, you know, I like to spend some time getting to know a woman before I sleep with them. And yes, use the words "sleep with" rather than something vague like "take it to the next level," which could mean anything. I really think if you do this you will find most women very pleased by it. Not many women mind if they get stuck in the kissing phase for an extended period of time.

 

 

Personally I don't, and if anything welcome it :D I have had more action since I got divorced than I did married bar the emotional blackmail, endless drama and mind games.

 

If anything, when a woman is willing to give it up on a first date, I take that to mean she thinks am decent enough to bang, and am only more than happy to oblige. It will be rude not to :bunny:

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So, because everyone is jumping off a bridge, then you should too?

 

Now a days, women are being taught to "have sex like a man"...what you don't hear in popular media is how women who "been there, done that" with trying to have sex like a man are re-thinking that stance and/or having reactions that they haven't been able to link to their cavalier attitude about sex.

 

What do some say? 'Treat a lady like a lady and then some...' In other words, treat a lady how she presents herself...

 

But, I get ya, don't compromise who you are. If you don't feel comfortable with jumping in bed with someone and they are laying it on you thick, then don't do it.

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Having sex with women is "not respecting them"?

Being sexual with women is "hurting them"?

- Thats news to me.

 

If you dont feel comfortable yourself, just dont do it bro, but women love sex, I think, more than men do

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Having sex with women is "not respecting them"?

Being sexual with women is "hurting them"?

- Thats news to me.

 

If you dont feel comfortable yourself, just dont do it bro, but women love sex, I think, more than men do

 

I guess that feminist presentation in high school health class did it's job.

 

I have a fear of being accused of something bad. That and also a fear of std's.

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I guess that feminist presentation in high school health class did it's job.

 

I have a fear of being accused of something bad. That and also a fear of std's.

 

 

Married people have been know to contact stds, when one of them goes outside the marriage for some extra extra

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You must be a ****ing studly looking dude is almost all I have to say.

 

That said, your fear of STD's is not unreasonable.

 

Should I just stop being so worried about not hurting people or respecting women and just play along with it?

 

Only if you're comfortable with that. If you're not, end the dates early and keep dating until you find somebody a little more to your liking. That's actually good advice whatever the situation, so go with that.

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I guess that feminist presentation in high school health class did it's job.

 

I have a fear of being accused of something bad. That and also a fear of std's.

 

I think I know of the fear that youre talking about.

I dont have that fear anymore.

It was probably hardwired into you by your mom, or some female figure. Its garbage.

 

Let me give you a little story. I went out a girl one time, she asked the age of the last girl I dated. I told her she was like 18, I'm 28. She proceeded to call me a pedophile, I think nothing of it, at the end of the night we werfe banging. Turns out that that girl was molested as a kid, which is why she has insecurities about that sort of stuff.

It made for weird sexual play, which is another story.

- The bottom line is, you know what you are, dont let anyone tell you what your "truth" is, be yourself.

 

As for the STD fear, have sex with one person at a time, and ask em questions

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I've dated girls who would talk about sex openly on the first date. I realised soon after that they were desperate for sex. Masturbation is hard for some girls. They can't bring themselves to orgasm without a dick.

 

Like the above posters said, if they talk about sex and are pretty hands on, you know they are raging for it.

 

It came unexpected to me and frankly it was quite off putting. As I'm never the type to get turned on by looks alone. . Maybe it's the aquaria in me.

 

But yea. Girls are wild here days.

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The first woman I ever dated was touching me, making me touch her and asking me to spend the night the second time we hung out. Same thing with the woman I met on match who claimed she was interested in friendship, second date she was flirting with me hard. Another girl started talking about sex on the first date. Should I just stop being so worried about not hurting people or respecting women and just play along with it?

 

Some women like sex and will want to have sex with a person they like within 1 or a few dates. Not sure why this is a surprise. Not all women will be the same, which also shouldn't be a surprise. If you're not comfortable with the fast speed of progression from "hello" to bedroom then take action to slow things down.

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Married people have been know to contact stds, when one of them goes outside the marriage for some extra extra

 

I second this...

 

In my experience the most... promiscuous *searching for the appropriate word* will know full well how to look after themselves and will do so. Its the ones who are a bit more trusting that you need to watch.

 

If you are worried about STD's then all you have to do is take some simple steps;

 

1. condoms at all times.

2. check genital area for anything "unusual", smell, scabs, scratches, soreness, cracked or dry skin etc

3. I assume you are a man so for goodness sake no BJ's while she has a cold sore or any form of sore around her mouth (vice versa for any one reading)

4. if you are in any way sore in mouth/ genital area then no sex for you!

5. before you get physical ask them to get tested. Remember they will have to have been sexually inactive for 6 months for HIV/ AIDS

 

If a person is not grown up enough to talk about this stuff then quite frankly they are not grown up enough to be sleeping about.

 

For so many to come on so strong you must be a good looking chap... or just stink of manly pheromones.... :laugh: classic "Lynx Effect"!

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I want everything straight away. But I know there's rules and things usually don't work out unless you follow them.

 

So your someone inexperienced? She probably thinks she has to be the man because someone going to initiate everything and if your not doing it she will.

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