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Thats it. Deleting these guys from my phone


PinkCarnations

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PinkCarnations

This is it. No more wondering if a guy's into me - why he takes nearly 24 hours to reply to my texts, whether he's truly busy or is initialing a slow fade. Why he seems into me when I hang out with him but it feels like strangers when we are apart, guys who pick and choose which messages to reply to, guys who disappear and then text me or call me randomly months later only to disappear once again.

 

I am deleting all of these guys from my phone. No more deciphering their messages and going over every interaction. Anytime a guy comes close to ignoring me, I am deleting them. and that's it. I am not replying even if they eventually reply.

 

Maybe I'm overreacting, but seriously, I am so fed up, guys!!

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Once a guy proves himself not worth my time, I also delete him from my devices and never reply to any follow-up messages. In these cases it's a refreshing feeling to hit "delete" :D

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Hey now, all of us guys aren't bad. I do feel like you do though. Twice I have gotten the slow fade/i don't know what I want/I think I like my ex now/you're perfect/maybe he is too nice from women. I call, text, remember birthdays and special events, and actively listen. My alternative is just to realize like I just did with the last woman I talked to and do my best to cut communication. Sad part is that I actually end up caring and that makes it difficult for me. I'm not someone who likes to burn bridges unless absolutely necessary.

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i did that too, but then she (my ex) text messaging me after few days , and i ended up saving her number ..after few days i decided to delete it again and she text messaging me again and i saved it again.. And so on ..happened for few weeks, i know it's ridiculous , lol..

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Ok so this is a big dramatic statement.

 

But I'm guessing something specific set it off. Or someone more like.

 

 

What happened? No point overreacting if it's unnecessary. Plenty of people have different expectations about timeframes of contact. Guys in particular often don't get the text to connect thing and see it as a functional thing. Like yep see you at this time/place or yeah day was good. And that's it.

 

Examine your expectations and motivations.

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Lernaean_Hydra

If you can do this and stick to it you are setting a bar for yourself and your life that is both admirable and healthy. Not only that, but you're now setting the standard for what you will and won't tolerate and thus when someone else comes along and tries to pull this same nonsense in the future, you'll be far less inclined to put up with it for long, if at all. Good on you, I say!

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PinkCarnations
Are you telling me you're supposed to respond to a message within 24 hours? :confused::mad:

 

Uh apart from extraordinary circumstances, yes....!!?? If someone takes longer than that to respond to you, then clearly they're not that that interested in communicating with you.

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PinkCarnations
Ok so this is a big dramatic statement.

 

But I'm guessing something specific set it off. Or someone more like.

 

 

What happened? No point overreacting if it's unnecessary. Plenty of people have different expectations about timeframes of contact. Guys in particular often don't get the text to connect thing and see it as a functional thing. Like yep see you at this time/place or yeah day was good. And that's it.

 

Examine your expectations and motivations.

 

It's been an ongoing problem while dating the last couple of years. Guys will take forever to respond to me and eventually don't reply at all, and the entire time, I keep wasting my time waiting for a response and wondering if he got in a car accident or something happened and that's why he wasn't responding or maybe my last text turned him off or how can I redeem myself. Well no more. Once a guy shows any sign of ignoring me, I'm cutting him off and will not talk to him anymore.

 

Also it's not like I'm expecting a quick response from these guys, but I can tell when a guy is ignoring my text on purpose. For instance, they text me back, I respond within 5 minutes, but then they won't respond until an entire day later??? Clearly they saw my message. Let this be a lesson for the fellas, ignore a girl for more than a day for no reason or acting aloof/uninterested in any way will garner a Delete from girls like me.! Ignore me? Well don't expect to hear from me ever again.

Edited by PinkCarnations
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Sounds like a common denominator thing to me.

 

Do you know how many times I get crappy texts from women in the past 2 or 3 years? Sometimes I'm busy. Sometimes I look at the message and my boss walks in and I put my phone away and I don't remember til the next day. Sometimes I don't feel like engaging in a "hey how r u" at 9:30 PM.

 

If it is happening with EVERY guy you go out with, maybe you need to examine what you are doing with your text game.

 

Honestly, if men were a lot more forthcoming at how boring texting can be sometimes, maybe this incessant need to constantly be texting between man and female would die down.

 

If they ignore you, then that's on them, and feel free to delete the number. But if it's a consistent thing happening to you, you might want to start ignoring the variables and examine the constant.

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Uh apart from extraordinary circumstances, yes....!!?? If someone takes longer than that to respond to you, then clearly they're not that that interested in communicating with you.

That could be. I did date one rather independent woman though who would break the 24 hour barrier occasionally, but she was still really into me when we were together in person. And when we would talk on the phone. If you need a higher level of attention though I totally get that. That level of independence can be grating sometimes. =/

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As a man, if a woman I was actively talking to took 24 hrs to text me back consistently I'd definitely lose interest. It's the age of smartphones and if people can tweet and be on instagram, they certainly can text back before 24 hours. I've learned that people make time for the people they want in their lives.

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I clean my phone on regular basis. I don't think the man of my life will take 24 hrs to reply to my text. Especially if when he's with me he's checking that damn device every 10 minutes.

 

Also I delete the dudes that text just for the sake of texting and never make an invitation. They're out.

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Michelle ma Belle

Amen and good for you!

 

I am a firm believer that if someone is interested in you they will MOVE MOUNTAINS to stay connected. It's really that simple. And that goes BOTH ways by the way just in case anyone thinks I'm bashing men specifically.

 

Once you REALLY understand that it's a very freeing and transformative experience. I mean who wants to sit around pining and calculating and over thinking EVERY bloody word or text or move? Sounds insanely exhausting to me. There are much better ways to spend your time and energy.

 

If it's meant to be, it will be come hell or high water.

 

Until then, thank and release as I always say.

 

Good luck!

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This is it. No more wondering if a guy's into me - why he takes nearly 24 hours to reply to my texts, whether he's truly busy or is initialing a slow fade. Why he seems into me when I hang out with him but it feels like strangers when we are apart, guys who pick and choose which messages to reply to, guys who disappear and then text me or call me randomly months later only to disappear once again.

 

I am deleting all of these guys from my phone. No more deciphering their messages and going over every interaction. Anytime a guy comes close to ignoring me, I am deleting them. and that's it. I am not replying even if they eventually reply.

 

Maybe I'm overreacting, but seriously, I am so fed up, guys!!

 

Your not alone. Women do this too, in droves. Drives me nuts. Between trying to have "game" and "not appearing too available" and the slow fade or losing interest its at times difficult to decipher WTF track they are on.

 

Wish people would just say what they mean, mean what they say, and have the balls to say that they dont want to say anything.

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Are you telling me you're supposed to respond to a message within 24 hours? :confused::mad:

 

I could see not responding to a voice mail for 24 hours. It takes time to get around to checking your messages and there isnt always paper around or a way to mark a reminder to call so it will often just don on you after a while that you need to call this person back.

 

But a text message can be responded to pretty quickly, non intrusively and people these days are literally glued to their phones already.

 

If they lose their phone or it is broken, maybe in that rare circumstance the delay is cool. But other than that its just rude.

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This is it. No more wondering if a guy's into me - why he takes nearly 24 hours to reply to my texts, whether he's truly busy or is initialing a slow fade. Why he seems into me when I hang out with him but it feels like strangers when we are apart, guys who pick and choose which messages to reply to, guys who disappear and then text me or call me randomly months later only to disappear once again.

 

I am deleting all of these guys from my phone. No more deciphering their messages and going over every interaction. Anytime a guy comes close to ignoring me, I am deleting them. and that's it. I am not replying even if they eventually reply.

 

Maybe I'm overreacting, but seriously, I am so fed up, guys!!

 

Women behave this way, too... which is kinda why guys do this to girls and vice versa... it's a vicious cycle.

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As a man, if a woman I was actively talking to took 24 hrs to text me back consistently I'd definitely lose interest. It's the age of smartphones and if people can tweet and be on instagram, they certainly can text back before 24 hours. I've learned that people make time for the people they want in their lives.

 

 

Ugh, I'm encountering this with a lady right now. She takes a long time, a day sometimes, to respond. But here's the funny thing - we're going out for the 5th time tomorrow. She's either not interested (which other things kinda lead me to believe) or she's a really slow burn type of gal.

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^^^I second what Michelle said on the last page^^^

 

Good for you OP! This is a pet peeve of mine with everybody. LOL I don't get mad, I just don't get it.

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This conversation is exhausting to read. Because everyone has experienced some form of this. That, and my neurons are firing like all hell because of past situations.

 

Texting doesn't make sense. Always call.

Because if you text... You have something visual to help you relive that pain. With a call... It's surprisingly easy to let go of and be like "I called, they never got back to me."

 

Silly Rabbit! Text is for kids!

 

INT. HOSPITAL ROOM

Laying on bed talking to nurse

"And she took 32 hours to respond to every text. And that's how I got cancer...."

 

I'm pretty sure I have a huge crush on Michelle ma Belle. You're beautiful.

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Isn't that a little drastic?

 

Although I pay tooooo much money to a certain BIG cellphone carrier, there's times I don't get texts for like a day or so - and my family will even get worried and wonder if something's happened to me or if I'm dissing them.

 

Also, I don't check my cel enough unless I'm expecting an important message/call or I just don't hear it. So, I have to assign special ringtones to people who contact me frequently (i.e. certain family members) so I can hear the music playing or I'll probably not hear the regular notification that comes with the phone.

 

I felt so bad the other day, a gf texted me like 6PM - which was normal, but I was busy with the dogs, trying to do things around the house and I never heard her call AND her text cuz I didn't respond to her call. It was like 11PM when I was like 'where's my phone so I can set the alarm?' then I saw her trying to contact me and I didn't bother calling/texting her back cuz it was 11PM and I didn't want to wake her AND, I wasn't sure if she had her phone on "silent", cuz I do put my phone's ringer/txt off between 2AM - 10AM cuz I don't wanna be bothered...

 

So, also, the "silent mode" of 2AM - 10AM also causes me to miss messages and several times my brother will txt me to run an errand for him and I get upset cuz I missed it and have to jump through hoops to do what he asked me to do before the place he needs me to go to closes.

 

Sorry for the long rant, but just goes to show that 24 hrs is kinda strict and cellphones - no matter HOW MUCH MONEY I PAY FOR IT - are not perfect.

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Oh, what a coincidence! I did this earlier this week.

 

And guess what? One of them has text me after quite few weeks.... and a broken date!! :rolleyes:

 

Now that I've read this, I think it's best to just not reply to him or any others that may come out of the wood work. Unless there's some good reason why I should bother?

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I'm not a big texter. "How are you" texts make my skin crawl and are pointless IMO. Other than a quick catch up or to iron out plans, I don't text. It seems like a lot of people just text now days, complete conversations.

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