Lipitor11 Posted September 17, 2014 Share Posted September 17, 2014 I've been messaging this guy in OLD for 2 weeks, the basic chit chat. He hasn't mentioned anything about meeting up? I mean, what are the rules? Guys take a long time to ask or something? Or does he have no intentions on meeting up? Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted September 17, 2014 Share Posted September 17, 2014 I think a lot of people are on OLD because they have trouble socialising in real life. Ask him and you will find out soon enough. Link to post Share on other sites
Crila16 Posted September 17, 2014 Share Posted September 17, 2014 OLD can be very tricky. Watch a few episodes of Catfish. Have you skyped with him or spoken to him on the phone? You should really do that before meeting with him in person. If you two haven't skyped or spoken on the phone yet...something up. Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted September 17, 2014 Share Posted September 17, 2014 There are no "rules". It seems he is not going to ask to meet, so if you want to meet with him then you will need to ask. If you don't want to do that due to some social preconceptions then you'll have to just have to carry on doing what you're doing. For what it's worth I always asked to meet up after a couple of days, max. Link to post Share on other sites
Mascara Posted September 17, 2014 Share Posted September 17, 2014 I always tried to avoid doing the first "ask" because I found a lot of men will still message you even if they're not that interested - almost like they're afraid to let any prospects off the hook, but they're not convinced they want to meet. Perhaps women do that too, but I wasn't dating them. What worked for me was that I stopped responding. I didn't want a pen pal, and I'd get bored after a couple of weeks of emails. That spurred them into either asking me out, or an excuse to stop talking if they were essentially uninterested. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted September 17, 2014 Share Posted September 17, 2014 Not everybody is on a rocket pace. He may want to get to know you more before asking. You can always ask him. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Emilia Posted September 17, 2014 Share Posted September 17, 2014 I always tried to avoid doing the first "ask" because I found a lot of men will still message you even if they're not that interested - almost like they're afraid to let any prospects off the hook, this is true too Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lipitor11 Posted September 17, 2014 Author Share Posted September 17, 2014 I always tried to avoid doing the first "ask" because I found a lot of men will still message you even if they're not that interested - almost like they're afraid to let any prospects off the hook, but they're not convinced they want to meet. Perhaps women do that too, but I wasn't dating them. What worked for me was that I stopped responding. I didn't want a pen pal, and I'd get bored after a couple of weeks of emails. That spurred them into either asking me out, or an excuse to stop talking if they were essentially uninterested. Yeah, that's what I will do! Take a break from messaging him. I'm getting bored with the back and forth messages. Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted September 17, 2014 Share Posted September 17, 2014 I don't wait for a man to ask me to meet over coffee. After 2-3 days of back and forth if he has not mention anything then I ask him if he's interested in meeting over coffee right now. If he does not jump all over it then I drop him. I am not online to create a virtual connection. I am online to make a contact THEN the rest is done face to face. The only thing I need to know about him before meeting are: 1. How old are you 2. What do you do for work 3. How long have you been single Then my next question is *when you free*. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
oberkeat Posted September 17, 2014 Share Posted September 17, 2014 I don't see any problem with you asking him if he wants to meet. You could say something like, "So...are you going to ask me out? :)" After that, he will either ask you out, or he won't. If he doesn't, move on. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
HappyLove Posted September 17, 2014 Share Posted September 17, 2014 "I mean, what are the rules?" The wife has to say it's ok. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted September 17, 2014 Share Posted September 17, 2014 Yeah, that's what I will do! Take a break from messaging him. I'm getting bored with the back and forth messages. I was just going to ask if you are getting bored.. This is what I do..after about a week when I am active on OLD. He has to do the asking.(*disclaimer* this does not mean he has to pay - but I prefer a man to ask - he should have the cajonas to ask IMO). 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts