How would you react to this

[SlimJim90]

Hey guys my girlfriend and I have been dating for almost 7 months now. Shes 20 and I'm 21. We go to the same university. Here's the situation.

 

Last night my girlfriend calls me to tell me about this weird thing that happened while I was at work. Getting out of her last class for the day her ex, who she dated for two years and hasn't had contact with in over 3 months, was in the hallway and greeted her.

 

Apparently he asked her out but he quickly changed it to lets go get something to eat in the food court to catch up. She did just that. After their dinner he insisted on walking her to her dorm. Again she let him do that.

 

She didn't even ask me how I felt about it. It was just her telling the story and laughing it off.

 

Here's where I'm starting to loose my cool.

 

I just started my on campus job shift when I got this message.

 

Her- "I just left class because I'm really sick. Like I threw up and my head hurts really bad"

 

Me- "I'm sorry to hear that. Its raining pretty hard outside. I'm sure my boss will let me leave for a few minutes to pick you up and drop you off at you dorm. As long as I clock out. How does that sound to you?"

 

15 minutes later

 

Her- "That would of been nice but I texted (her ex) to come pick me up and drop me off. I hope you are okay with that. I just thought you couldnt get off and hes the only one I know that could do that for me."

 

Me- "Oh. I could of done that for you though"

 

Her- "I know but he was here for me" (Ouch to my man pride!)

 

Me- "Okay. Did he just pick you up and drop you off?"

 

Her- "Kind of. He was being sweet and walked me to the door again. He did ask if he could walk me all the way to my room but I told him no"

 

Me- "Okay. I don't understand why you didnt call (her roommate) to come get you though. But if he truly was the only one that could do that for you I owe him a thank you. Now I get done with everything at 3. Would you like me to drop by to take care of you?"

 

Her- "No I feel a lot better thank you though"

 

Me- "But you were so sick that you had to leave class less than an hour ago?"

 

Her- "I know. But I feel better. Dont worry about dropping by I am okay. You're a great boyfriend for trying to take care of me. Love you"

 

Me- "Love you too"

 

Honestly guys I'm not okay with any of this. It seems like this snake of a guy is trying to get back with her and I don't know if its working. I have full faith in her but this guy use to mentally abuse her a lot. I use to see it myself when they were dating way back when. I'm just really worried.

 

What do you guys think?

[todreaminblue]

i think you should be honest with her on how it makes you feel that her ex is wheedling his way in...because sounds like he will make his move soon....you need to tell her hanging out with her ex isnt something that you agree with..deb

[Zahara]

I think this girl is manipulative.

 

Your last thread 4 months ago, you mention that she has admitted to seeing the ex once a week and that if you didn't like it, you could take a hike. What kind of girlfriend prioritizes an ex over a boyfriend?

 

Her conversation with you sounds like she was either trying to make you jealous or possibly trying to plant a little seed of insecurity in your head, as in be prepared for the ex is now in the picture. I don't know for what reason but maybe in a passive aggresive way to let you that something is going on.

[d0nnivain]

Them talking in the hallway after class should have been OK & no big deal. Her actively reaching out for him is BAD. Explain to her that her actions scream that she wants him back & that she is no longer interested in being your GF. If she can't see that, walk away because she's playing some sort or mean game with your feelings.

[Supernatural]

You need to get your power back. I would tell her that I was not okay with the situation, then say I need time to myself and make her realize on a deeper level what she did.

Simply saying, "Im not okay with this..." Is what she is expecting (unless you never speak up) but it's just words. She is playing actions... So do the same and take a week to yourself and seriously consider what she is and has/might still do.

Look out for yourself. She could cheat on you... And maybe already has.

 

If you posted a thread 4 months ago about this same situation - ex in the photo and her talking to him/hanging out - then this has trouble all over it. If it was me, and It it's only been 7 months I'm almost certain I would end it.

 

If my ex texted me and said he was "sweet", called him over you, then didn't want me to come over after work... I think from history of everything and just how she is manipulating your feelings... I would call it quits.

 

It seems like this ex will always be in the picture. And her way of letting you know he is still around is garbage.

 

Don't accept it.

[Supernatural]

She texted you to tell you "I'm Sick". You were gentleman. Then she responds to let you know her ex picked her up...which she called. Not you.

 

Then she got a rise out of you, and all of a sudden felt better, and doesn't want you come over?

 

What kind of girl doesn't want company when she's feeling a little ****ty, unless she was feeling guilty.

 

This whole situation reeks..

[preraph]

Yeah, it's bad. I'm sorry. Sounds like she's still got a thing for him. If all she wanted to do is hear about his life and catch up but had no real feelings, she certainly could have done that with you present, even if it meant him whispering into her ear in a noisy bar or him coming over for dinner and then you giving them 20 minutes alone while you busy yourself.

 

You will have to tell her you're not okay with this because of her reaching out to him instead of you and that you feel it was just an excuse to contact him OR a lie to you about seeing him. Sorry. You sound like a good bf. Apparently she doesn't deserve you.