CadeYeager Posted August 23, 2014 Share Posted August 23, 2014 I'm meeting up with a girl tomorrow for a cup of coffee. This is obviously my chance to show who I am and for her to do the same. How do I keep the conversation towards the direction of her knowing that I'm interested in her and that I just don't wanna "be friends?" I don't wanna keep it friendly like I'm talking to my female friends. What do I do? Flirt? Poke fun at? Link to post Share on other sites
54JA Posted August 23, 2014 Share Posted August 23, 2014 How well do you know this girl? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author CadeYeager Posted August 23, 2014 Author Share Posted August 23, 2014 How well do you know this girl? I know little to nothing about her. Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted August 23, 2014 Share Posted August 23, 2014 unless you know her fairly well i would keep any teasing very light...as she may not know you well enough to know you are teasing her....deb 2 Link to post Share on other sites
54JA Posted August 23, 2014 Share Posted August 23, 2014 How did you find this girl? Link to post Share on other sites
Author CadeYeager Posted August 23, 2014 Author Share Posted August 23, 2014 How did you find this girl? In my college class. Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted August 23, 2014 Share Posted August 23, 2014 I know little to nothing about her. Then why/how do you know you want to be more than "just friends?" Are you looking for a f*ck buddy just based on her physical appearance? Because unless you know "little to nothing about her," you don't really know enough about her to know if there is a potential of being anything romantic. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author CadeYeager Posted August 23, 2014 Author Share Posted August 23, 2014 Then why/how do you know you want to be more than "just friends?" Are you looking for a f*ck buddy just based on her physical appearance? Because unless you know "little to nothing about her," you don't really know enough about her to know if there is a potential of being anything romantic. Of course not... What I'm simply saying is that I don't want to ride the conversation into the friend zone territory. So I don't how I should tailor the interactions to keep a distinct difference between a friendly and a "hey I'm very interested in you" interaction. Link to post Share on other sites
54JA Posted August 23, 2014 Share Posted August 23, 2014 All I can say is try to get to know her. I wouldn't even worry about getting stuck in what young people call the "friend zone" at this point. I think it's really important to really get back to the basics and remember respect and the importance of listening. To be honest, I don't think there is NOT much a guy can do to avoid a friend zone. If the girl is not attracted to you in some way, there isn't much you can do, especially the first time at a coffee shop. Be yourself and be respectful. Good luck! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted August 23, 2014 Share Posted August 23, 2014 What I'm simply saying is that I don't want to ride the conversation into the friend zone territory. So I don't how I should tailor the interactions to keep a distinct difference between a friendly and a "hey I'm very interested in you" interaction. Well, similar to what 54JA said, you sort of have to try and get to know her a little first before you can jump into fearing about that illusive "friend zone." What you *could* do is when you have that first coffee date, is bring a single flower. That is a small romantic gesture that will indicate off the bat that you see her as a potential. It will put her on her guard, but it would also make her open to flirting and possibly more. Link to post Share on other sites
DrSimple Posted August 23, 2014 Share Posted August 23, 2014 So you already asked her on a date, she accepted... And now you are wondering how to stay out of the friend zone? Well the only way this makes sense is if you think the coffee date might be viewed as "meeting as friends" rather than as a "date". If that is your fear, keep it simple and just slip in the "date" aspect into conversation. Even just a simple "I was looking forward to our date today." is enough to show that you aren't there to be her friend. When you say this you will either get: a) An acknowledgement of the statement b) A rebuke saying she didn't know if was a date Then you know. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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