Ian Fleming Posted July 30, 2014 Share Posted July 30, 2014 Say, what is typically the difference between a couple in love who are teenagers or in their early twenties compared to a couple in love who are in their mid twenties or even hitting their thirties? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 30, 2014 Share Posted July 30, 2014 It's calmer. You feel more secure & less anxious when you don't see each other 24/7. You understand that it's not all about you & the other person has responsibilities. The connection is deeper & more stable. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted July 30, 2014 Share Posted July 30, 2014 By then your hormones have setted down, and you are not so young and dumb. Obviously you are more mature by then, you know how relationships work, you know what you want in life, and you are more level headed. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted July 30, 2014 Share Posted July 30, 2014 I agree with d0nnivain, there is way less anxiety (well usually), and you focus on other things going on in your life, not just the relationship. That person enhances your life, but isn't your life. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ian Fleming Posted July 30, 2014 Author Share Posted July 30, 2014 so they basically becoming boring... I am going to need to make sure I only stick with dating women in their early 20s Link to post Share on other sites
GorillaTheater Posted July 30, 2014 Share Posted July 30, 2014 so they basically becoming boring... Depending on how much drama you've had in your life, a little "boring" sure can be welcome. Good luck with the young girls; you're probably in for all the drama you could want. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Tbisb74 Posted July 30, 2014 Share Posted July 30, 2014 Tell me how that works for you when you're 65. Boring is not a word I would ever use to describe my relationship with my H. Just because we can almost read each other's thoughts doesn't make it boring. In fact I have better, more animated discussions with him than I have ever had with any other person. Sadly, you sound like the kind of guy who likes boxed wine, 3 for $5.00 instead of a really, good quality, vintage wine costing $50/bottle. You have your cheap thrills, darling. But when you are aged and infirm, your young filly will be looking to greener pastures.... and being alone at that age, isn't all it's cut out to be. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted July 30, 2014 Share Posted July 30, 2014 You will realize there is more intensity when someone stimulates you intellectually. You can't get that with a 20 year old.....you will eventually get bored of them. Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted July 30, 2014 Share Posted July 30, 2014 (edited) It's calmer. You feel more secure & less anxious when you don't see each other 24/7. You understand that it's not all about you & the other person has responsibilities. The connection is deeper & more stable. I do believe this is how they should be and no offence to you dOnnivain but my experiences have been different. Your description is pretty good though so I'm using it as a baseline. It's calmer. I am calmer but the men I have had relationships with since I was 38 have been much less calm about the whole relationship. You feel more secure & less anxious when you don't see each other 24/7. Absolutely! However, again, this has been an issue for the men I have dated. The connection is deeper & more stable. I thought it was initially with each of the three men I have had relationships with in the last 8 years but actually each one was massively more drama filled and just ended up stressful and no fun whatsoever for me. I'm pretty easy going and always have been yet since getting older (and since splitting from my long term relationship back in 2006) I have found it much harder to stay on top of the demands..eg..constant contact via text or email I have found I am inadequate at giving constant reassurance to the guy I am with and he has requested it I have things like work and housework and hobbies of my own and these have been a problem as my time is 'more his' than my own. I have no problem not hearing from my SO for a couple of days - it gives me a chance to miss him and is healthy IMO. I like a guy who has his own hobbies and interests just as I do but I seem to have 'become their hobby and only interest' in these relationships. In fairness the first of these three relationships was calmer in some ways - but there was still drama. His wife cited me in their divorce ......he had told me he was already divorced..... I'm looking for the version d0nnivain has summed up. The good news is that the last relationship taught me a whole lot and I now know signs and things to avoid (plus things not to push under the carpet as bizarre/funny) next time around. Edited July 30, 2014 by GemmaUK Link to post Share on other sites
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