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What do you make of this?


Thewayitwas2

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Thewayitwas2

I'm dating a doctor... And I'm trying to step back and take stock of how often he talks vs times where I actually speak. He talks a lot... It isn't that he is not lot listening to me. He just seems to talk about himself and his life a ton.

 

I notice he doesn't seem to ask me too many questions either...

 

Anyway... Over the weekend he made a comment that seemed a little off to me.

 

He is always rubbing my arm or holding my hand. He said ... Do you notice sometimes that I like to feel your pulse? I said no I didn't realize. He said that he loves feeling that because it is the most raw form of a human. That it makes him feel so close to me. Like listening to my heart or looking into my eyes. I just smiled. And he said you know... They even use heart rates etc for lie detectors because they show the real interval biological part of the body.

 

I just smiled and said yeah I guess that's true...

 

Does that sound like typical conversation? Maybe it is for a doctor. I just wondered. It sounded a little controlling...

 

Normal?

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Normal? Not really, but it doesn't seem to far out of the mainstream.

 

But controlling? Where do you get that from? It seems that some women are trying to find controlling and abusive behavior in every interaction. There are several similar threads going on right now. I don't get it.

 

Back to your situation. It is not uncommon for one person in a couple to do the vast majority of the talking. It is a little unusual that it is the guy. I've found it is usually the woman. But that's likely because I don't feel the need to talk much.

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Controlling in the sense that he's basically stating "I'll question you and feel your pulse?" Yeah, I know what you mean. I'd be uneasy with that one too, this subtle way of showing jealousy/insecurity or w/e is going on with him.

 

I wouldn't like it either. I find his remark a bit unsettling.

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Thewayitwas2

I'm probably just over reacting... Thanks for the input.

 

I guess after bad relationships I am constantly looking for signs or red flags. Don't want to be silly..

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Oh. I didn't catch the human lie detector angle. That would be wierd if that was what he meant. If so, I'd say he was watching too many spy movies.

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