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After reading John Grey’s book ‘Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus’ I have got to understand the difference between men and women in relationships and it helped me see situations where I have overreacted in the past.

 

I’ve been dating this guy for several months and he is the nicest guy I’ve ever dated. He is quite shy which is the opposite of the man I have dated in the last, but recently he has been distant with me. I know men have a rubber band effect where they pull away when things get serious, so I don’t know if he is just having some cave time or if something else has happened. I’m not saying this to be defensive, but I think I would know if he wanted to take a break from our relationship. From the start of our relationship, he put in so much effort, almost too much for my liking, but I didn’t want to seem rude so I responded to his texts etc. Our dates have been amazing and he is the most caring and funny man I have met in ages.

 

I don’t know what to do now since I haven’t heard from him in 2 weeks which is ridiculous. When we last spoke I could tell he was so run down from work stress and he appologised from being so distant. I text him back saying I understand how he must be feeling with stress etc. Maybe he just wants to take time away from our relationship to focus on work, but im would think 2 weeks is too long. He usually contacts everyone via BBM but he hasn’t been online in over a week. I haven’t contacted him at all in the 2 weeks because I didn’t want to bug him. I feel stupid being like this.

 

Should I just leave it and wait for him to contact me or shall I send him a text?

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Wow two weeks is too long. Absolutely text him! Something is not right here and you need to know where you stand.

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Pressing for a discussion will most likely backfire.

 

I'd call, not text, and invite him to get together for coffee, a drink, dinner, whatever.

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That book is a pile of.........

The word 'problem' came up too many times for me to take it seriously!

 

After two weeks I would consider myself single.

That's a lie. It would take 7 days...and I don't even much like daily contact. I don't see the need.

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I have dated many, and had 4 serious relationships....and not once did I experience this "rubberband" effect when things got too serious.

 

He is either A. a frickin coward and doesn't want to date you anymore, or B. he has met someone else, is married or is hooking up with his ex. or C, cheated and is too much of a coward to tell you.

 

 

I would write him off.

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If a guy I was dating for several MONTHS didn't reach out to me for two weeks I would be calling him, asking for an explanation or just ending it. There is no reason to go that long without contact, stress or no stress.

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torturedartist
After reading John Grey’s book ‘Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus’ I have got to understand the difference between men and women in relationships and it helped me see situations where I have overreacted in the past.

 

I’ve been dating this guy for several months and he is the nicest guy I’ve ever dated. He is quite shy which is the opposite of the man I have dated in the last, but recently he has been distant with me. I know men have a rubber band effect where they pull away when things get serious, so I don’t know if he is just having some cave time or if something else has happened. I’m not saying this to be defensive, but I think I would know if he wanted to take a break from our relationship. From the start of our relationship, he put in so much effort, almost too much for my liking, but I didn’t want to seem rude so I responded to his texts etc. Our dates have been amazing and he is the most caring and funny man I have met in ages.

 

I don’t know what to do now since I haven’t heard from him in 2 weeks which is ridiculous. When we last spoke I could tell he was so run down from work stress and he appologised from being so distant. I text him back saying I understand how he must be feeling with stress etc. Maybe he just wants to take time away from our relationship to focus on work, but im would think 2 weeks is too long. He usually contacts everyone via BBM but he hasn’t been online in over a week. I haven’t contacted him at all in the 2 weeks because I didn’t want to bug him. I feel stupid being like this.

 

Should I just leave it and wait for him to contact me or shall I send him a text?

 

Unless he has a legitimate reason for not being in contact with you so long (i.e. he fell into a coma) my suggestion is to be done with him. He's showing a tremendous amount of disrespect and lack of concern for you by leaving you hanging for two weeks.

 

And if he's capable of behaving this way once, he's capable of behaving this way again. He's already proven to you the kind of person he is.

 

If you want to give him another chance, you need to put it on him and make it clear you're ready to move on, unless he shapes up. You have to be genuinely ready to let the relationship end unless he comes through and makes his wrongs up to you.

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After reading John Grey’s book ‘Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus’ I have got to understand the difference between men and women in relationships and it helped me see situations where I have overreacted in the past.

 

I’ve been dating this guy for several months and he is the nicest guy I’ve ever dated. He is quite shy which is the opposite of the man I have dated in the last, but recently he has been distant with me. I know men have a rubber band effect where they pull away when things get serious, so I don’t know if he is just having some cave time or if something else has happened. I’m not saying this to be defensive, but I think I would know if he wanted to take a break from our relationship. From the start of our relationship, he put in so much effort, almost too much for my liking, but I didn’t want to seem rude so I responded to his texts etc. Our dates have been amazing and he is the most caring and funny man I have met in ages.

 

I don’t know what to do now since I haven’t heard from him in 2 weeks which is ridiculous. When we last spoke I could tell he was so run down from work stress and he appologised from being so distant. I text him back saying I understand how he must be feeling with stress etc. Maybe he just wants to take time away from our relationship to focus on work, but im would think 2 weeks is too long. He usually contacts everyone via BBM but he hasn’t been online in over a week. I haven’t contacted him at all in the 2 weeks because I didn’t want to bug him. I feel stupid being like this.

 

Should I just leave it and wait for him to contact me or shall I send him a text?

 

For some reason, I'm getting the feeling that he's seeing what you have to offer him.

You havent contacted him in 2 weeks either. So I think he has, his answer

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todreaminblue

whose to know , no one on here knows what is going on not really , only guesses, you need to contact him and see what is happening he isnt contacting others either, I feel after seven months a phone call is appropriate to arrange a time you can meet and have a chat.....deb

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I have to echo an earlier sentiment... why did YOU wait two weeks?

I might not completely schooled in the marvels of modern-day technology, but last I checked, a phone not only receives calls, it can make them too.

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As per my experience men do go in their cave at times but it's very subtle, they never completely cut contact, and no more than 48 hours.

 

This is a totally different ball game here. This is an unacceptable behavior for a relationship of several months. He checked out of this relationship by fading away, he's weak and a coward.

 

You call him, make the break up official, so at least it gives you some closure.

Edited by Gaeta
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Yea i guess i should call him for closure. I waited two weeks because i was the last one to contact him. I know i didn't ask him a question, but surely if he wanted to contact me he would of by now. What confuses me about him is that if i ever ask him a question in my text he always replies within 30 mins and replies to my texts like everything is fine in our relationship, but when i answer his question without a question he doesn't always text me back. My last text wasn't that interesting but i just wanted him to know i understand the stress he is under to show i care. In my opinion he is the weak one and i cant be bothered with him if he doesn't show that he cares. I've got used to him not being in my life and although it hurts I'm glad it wasn't more serious.

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