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Girl from Tinder won't stop texting me...and it's creeping me out


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Okay, so I matched up with this girl on Tinder almost two weeks ago. She wasn't really my type but I ended up swiping right anyway. So she initiated the conversation through the app, asking me how I was doing and things like that. I wasn't really too keen on it, but for some reason she asked me what part of town I live in and asked me if I wanted to text. At this point I though she might be fishing around for a hookup, so I figured I'd play along.

 

So I get her number and the next day we text a bit. She asks for picture of me--which for a lack of better judgement I send to her (a quick, non-descript selfie) after asking her to send me one of her first. My biggest mistake at this point was when she said I looked good in my picture, and I returned the compliment about her picture.

 

I then asked her what she was looking for, and she said 'dating' (I was expecting a different answer based on the conversation). To which I said that I basically was looking for something casual (hoping that she'd think I didn't want to date), and she replied with a "I'm not here for a hookup". I said that's fine, that I wasn't suggesting a hookup, but that I wasn't looking for a long term relationship. And I left it at that. I didn't text her any further thinking that I'd do the typical fade-out, since I wasn't really interested in dating her.

 

Well now the problem is that she hasn't gotten the hint and she won't stop texting me. Every few days she'll text me in the evening with "Whats going on"...literally that same phrase each and every time. A few times she also texted me with a Good Morning. Each time I don't respond thinking that she'll finally get the hint, but so far the texts keep coming...and frankly, it's starting to creep me out. I'm somewhat inclined to text her back finally and just tell her that I'm not interested, but I'm afraid that that'll unleash something that will be worse than the bizarre texts I'm getting right now.

 

So I don't know what to do...do I just keep ignoring her? Or do I block her number? I realize that I shouldn't have engaged in conversation with her in the first place, especially since I did have hooking up in the back of my mind (selfish, I know)...but I never thought that she'd continue texting me after me continually not replying. It's creepy the way she keeps texting the same thing over and over, and my wild imagination is imagining her obsessing over me now and trying to potentially find me in person.

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Tell her that you are not interested.

 

If she starts to get crazy, block her.

 

Blocking her without telling her first is rude and something that a person with no balls would do.

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Really? An entire thread to ask how to get a girl you've never met to back off?

 

 

I can think of 73893748493 decent ways but probably the easiest would be "Look, you're a very nice girl. I've met someone I'm interested in seeing. I don't multi date and would therefore like to wish you best of luck in finding someone!"

 

Or...

 

"I'm happy I've had the opportunity to chat with you a bit but I don't see anything developing between us. Good luck to you."

 

Or...

 

"I really appreciate that you've put forth the effort to reach out but I don't feel we would be a good match."

 

... Anything. At all. Who cares? You've never met her. You're making a big deal out of nothing. Just politely tell her you're not interested and delete her number.

 

If you can't do this with a girl from Tinder that you've never met, how can you do this in person with someone you've gone on a few dates with?

 

If you can't do these things, you shouldn't be dating.

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I think if u told her you weren't interested she'd stop texting.

 

You got into this hole yourself, you're gonna have to dig yourself out.

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why her texts are creeping you out by the way?

she is just being nice probably because she likes you and she is not actually telling you she wants to marry you or crazy things like that.

she doesnt know you and she cant read your mind so if you are not interested stop waste her time because at least she has been honest and she told you what she was looking for. in the other hand instead you are the one that doesnt know how to handle the situation and is making a big thing out of it.

just drop it.

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SoonMyFriend

Just tell her you are no longer interested and that you don't want to keep chatting. Be blunt and just do it.

 

Then block her number. Done.

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I've always assumed that someone who can't come up with more than 'What's going on" as an opener, time after time, is also sending it to ten other people, hoping for a bite.

 

 

 

Tell her you're not interested, you don't owe her too much at this point.

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Really? An entire thread to ask how to get a girl you've never met to back off?

 

 

I can think of 73893748493 decent ways but probably the easiest would be "Look, you're a very nice girl. I've met someone I'm interested in seeing. I don't multi date and would therefore like to wish you best of luck in finding someone!"

 

Or...

 

"I'm happy I've had the opportunity to chat with you a bit but I don't see anything developing between us. Good luck to you."

 

Or...

 

"I really appreciate that you've put forth the effort to reach out but I don't feel we would be a good match."

 

... Anything. At all. Who cares? You've never met her. You're making a big deal out of nothing. Just politely tell her you're not interested and delete her number.

 

If you can't do this with a girl from Tinder that you've never met, how can you do this in person with someone you've gone on a few dates with?

 

If you can't do these things, you shouldn't be dating.

 

Wow, quite the rush to judgement that I "shouldn't be dating." Thanks, I really appreciate the sentiment that I'm unfit for dating. Look, I didn't say that I was unwilling to text her back saying that I wasn't interested--if you read my OP you'll see that the thought crossed my mind. But the reason why I haven't done that yet is because while I may think that it's a considerate thing to do, in the past things that I thought were considerate ended up just backfiring on me, so I don't want this to be a case of me saying something and only making matters worse. That's why I'm asking for advice here.

 

Frankly, I've never been afforded the same courtesy of a girl in my age group saying to me, "sorry, I'm not interested." It seems to me that it's standard operating procedure to just stop responding to someone instead, so I didn't see this as being any different, particularly since I haven't met his girl and I don't really know her. On top of that, I've never been on the receiving end of someone constantly messaging me and trying to get a response, so please excuse my ignorance on what's an appropriate course of action.

 

I don't have a problem with telling her I'm not interested--my concern is that she's going to come back with a bunch of texts asking why.

 

And the texts are creeping me out because they're so robotic...you'd think that by the fifth time they'd get the picture that they're not going to receive a response...yet the texts keep coming. It doesn't make any sense to me and it's a bit alarming that she's so persistent because neither of us know each other at all...our conversation literally did not go beyond saying what part of town we live in, what we were looking for, and an exchange of pics.

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southernhemi

You come across as being quite "with it" and articulate.

 

Thumbs up to you for not doing the fade out and being courteous.

 

From a females point of view, tell her you're not interested, it was nice talking to her. If she goes all bunny boiler on her, block her.

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hoping2heal
Okay, so I matched up with this girl on Tinder almost two weeks ago. She wasn't really my type but I ended up swiping right anyway. So she initiated the conversation through the app, asking me how I was doing and things like that. I wasn't really too keen on it, but for some reason she asked me what part of town I live in and asked me if I wanted to text. At this point I though she might be fishing around for a hookup, so I figured I'd play along.

 

So I get her number and the next day we text a bit. She asks for picture of me--which for a lack of better judgement I send to her (a quick, non-descript selfie) after asking her to send me one of her first. My biggest mistake at this point was when she said I looked good in my picture, and I returned the compliment about her picture.

 

I then asked her what she was looking for, and she said 'dating' (I was expecting a different answer based on the conversation). To which I said that I basically was looking for something casual (hoping that she'd think I didn't want to date), and she replied with a "I'm not here for a hookup". I said that's fine, that I wasn't suggesting a hookup, but that I wasn't looking for a long term relationship. And I left it at that. I didn't text her any further thinking that I'd do the typical fade-out, since I wasn't really interested in dating her.

 

Well now the problem is that she hasn't gotten the hint and she won't stop texting me. Every few days she'll text me in the evening with "Whats going on"...literally that same phrase each and every time. A few times she also texted me with a Good Morning. Each time I don't respond thinking that she'll finally get the hint, but so far the texts keep coming...and frankly, it's starting to creep me out. I'm somewhat inclined to text her back finally and just tell her that I'm not interested, but I'm afraid that that'll unleash something that will be worse than the bizarre texts I'm getting right now.

 

So I don't know what to do...do I just keep ignoring her? Or do I block her number? I realize that I shouldn't have engaged in conversation with her in the first place, especially since I did have hooking up in the back of my mind (selfish, I know)...but I never thought that she'd continue texting me after me continually not replying. It's creepy the way she keeps texting the same thing over and over, and my wild imagination is imagining her obsessing over me now and trying to potentially find me in person.

 

Oh good grief charlie brown,

 

Don't BS to us, like you did your text girl. You were thinking that contact with her was going to lead to a ONS, and when she said she wasn't looking for a hookup, you lied through teeth by trying to claim you weren't either when that was the only reason you had for talking to her in the first place.

 

She won't stop texting you, because you keep being dishonest with her and leading her on instead of just being honest. Heaven knows what the reason for that is because it would certainly have saved you time. What you should do is quite simple; tell her the damn truth. "I'm sorry but I'm not interested in dating you and I don't have any interest in further texting". She will be confused no doubt, but it's better than continuing to lie to her.

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