My Strange Date, want to forget this guy but like him

[mishy]

I am just really posting here hoping someone will give me some perspective

 

towards the end of august i met this guy online dating. We had been chatting on the phpne and online for a few weeks then met August 18. We just stayed for one drink ( i had a new job i was starting the next day so just wanted a quick meet up)

 

Anyway at the end of it we both decided we would at least be friends and go out on the weekends to see bands etc, we had a lot in common in terms of music. He is really smart, a bit different a bit edgey.

 

anyway over he next few weeks, one day i called him and he was watching porn, and one thing lead to another and next thing we were having phone sex, well my voice is i am told pretty sexy over the phone, and he just got really turned on, anyway our whole thing became sexual after that, i didnt send him any photos of myself or anything but he did send many of himself. We still though didnt meet up. it was all over the phone

 

To both of us though, we actually really liked each other as people, that had already been established.

 

Many years ago he was an IV drug user and he has things happen i think as a result of that, hallucinations etc and some other health problems. So we didnt actually see each other again until last saturday night, when on impulse i invited him to a birthday gathering and a hotel. He came and i was really excited to see him again.

 

Before we left my house to go we went across the road to the pub to have a drink. We sat outside because he is a smoker ( i always swore id never date a smoker so i knew i must really like him) any way there was some really drunk men out there they must have been drinking for hours and they kept looking at us and saying rude things (we were kind of dressed nicely and coincidentally our colours matched). I couldnt exactly hear what they were saying, so i was looking at them just trying to work it out.

 

anyway my date, he said i was giving them the death stare, and he got a bit taken aback. But i wasnt, i was just a female trying to work out if i was under threat by these idiot drunk guys.

 

any way we left and went to the party.

 

We hadnt had dinner and we both got quite drunk. So stupid! He said i was throwing myself at him, dancing and stuff but honestly i thought that he had shown me during the past few weeks that he wanted sex from me, that we both wanted sex from each other. he sent me so many penis photos, he was staying at my house overnight that night, i just thought it was on the agenda.

 

Anyway he ended up telling me that he doesnt feel that way about me. So we went home, very drunk.

 

Then somehow at home we ended up naked he tore my pants off and threw me on the bed , performed oral sex on me, then he got really rough, holding me down and sucking my boobs way too hard. Tried to get him off me he wouldnt get off.

 

Anyway then he said he is way out of my league sexually and that he would just destroy my body if he had actual sex with me. So he didnt. And i was like, "you have been begging me to sleep with you for weeks, now i am here and you dont want me, you are rejecting me". Then he said oh i think you are a fantastic person, so sweet, so romantic, but i think i just view you as a friend.

 

So we went to sleep, naked, him spooning me.

 

I woke up at 6 am to him kissing me all over my arms, saying 'dont get up" then kissing me on the mouth.

 

Because he likes me only as a friend right?

 

So then he went home and that was it. He said he had a wonderful time and thanks for inviting him etc,

 

So what do you think happened here? what did i do wrong? where did i go wrong? Do i even speak to him anymore

 

someone give me some perspective please

[deathandtaxes]

Meh. Drop him. Find somebody else without the drama.

[mishy]

was it me that caused the drama? I dont know.

[Eivuwan]

It doesn't sound like it was you that caused the drama. This guy doesn't know what he wants or is too scared to get what he wants. Indecisive people are hard to deal with.

[HokeyReligions]

It doesn't sound like you caused the drama but it doesn't like a good match for a long term relationship either.

[mishy]

He had asked me quite a few times to sleep with him, during the previous month or so- to come over to his house and i never did. So finally when he gets the opportunity he rejects me and accuses me of coming on to him and throwing myself at him. I thought thats what he wanted.

 

Then after rejecting me he woke me up the next morning with kisses. Mixed messages much?

 

then the next day i asked him via text if he did or did not want to be lovers and he said he doesnt and that he didnt feel that chemistry.

 

So i said ok

[veggirl]

You are interested in this creepy creeperstein?!!!????? I'd copy and paste all the red flags but it'd basically be your whole post!!! He sounds like a HUGE as.shole and ffs wouldn't get off of you when you struggled?!?!?! :sick::sick:

 

He obviously gets off via insecure women who will actually be INTRIGUED by his absolute revoltness!! He was purposely being a dick cause it works on certain women and it worked on you. OMG. He's sick. Never talk to him again.

[truth_seeker]

Hold on a sec... he told you he doesn't have feelings for you and views you just as a friend... but gives you oral sex and sucks on your t-ts? wtf? This guy a crackhead? Oh wait... he is.

[deathandtaxes]

was it me that caused the drama? I dont know.

 

Both of you combined created a lot. There's plenty of other guys. NEXT!

[Lansing]

wow. If you hadn't been here since 2005 with so many posts I would have said "is this for real"??

 

I really think you should stop talking to him. It sounds like he likes playing games and trying to manipulate you. I would move on if I were you and cut him out of your life. He doesn't sound healthy.

[mishy]

Hold on a sec... he told you he doesn't have feelings for you and views you just as a friend... but gives you oral sex and sucks on your t-ts? wtf? This guy a crackhead? Oh wait... he is.

 

yeah he was a crackhead until 10 years ago. I still think here are some remnants of damage though. Amphetamines intravenous as far as i know

[mishy]

You are interested in this creepy creeperstein?!!!????? I'd copy and paste all the red flags but it'd basically be your whole post!!! He sounds like a HUGE as.shole and ffs wouldn't get off of you when you struggled?!?!?! :sick::sick:

 

He obviously gets off via insecure women who will actually be INTRIGUED by his absolute revoltness!! He was purposely being a dick cause it works on certain women and it worked on you. OMG. He's sick. Never talk to him again.

 

i didnt think it was purposeful, otherwise he seemed nice, i liked him as a person. I feel really led on with all the sex talk for weeks, i had told him i liek it gentle.. He likes rough sex and im the opposite. I remember after he held me down like that, later on he said that women ask him to tie them to a chair and basically pretend to rape them ( i mean consensual but kind of rape fantasy stuff).

Not my thing.

[lollipopspot]

Tried to get him off me he wouldnt get off...and that he would just destroy my body if he had actual sex with me...

 

You don't want to see this guy again. This is kind of dangerous for you.

 

For all you know he's a serial killer who decided not to dismember you...this time.

[StanMusial]

You should marry that guy.

[mishy]

You don't want to see this guy again. This is kind of dangerous for you.

 

For all you know he's a serial killer who decided not to dismember you...this time.

 

yeah... you are right

[petall]

Yeeshh..what are you thinking. The thing could have ended very very badly. You told him to stop and he refused (initially) and you still want to be with this guy?

 

Crikey. Thank whoever you pray to you got out of there unharmed.

[mishy]

Yeeshh..what are you thinking. The thing could have ended very very badly. You told him to stop and he refused (initially) and you still want to be with this guy?

 

Crikey. Thank whoever you pray to you got out of there unharmed.

 

he was holding me down with his arm across my collarbone and sucking my boobs way too hard and it hurt and i told him no, and then he said do you want me to stop, say stop and he still held me down until i really struggled. I had a bruise on my collarbone its still sore there. i was drunk though, so was he, so i dont know what really went on, but i do remember panicking and flailing my legs about trying to free myself

[mishy]

But i was drunk so my judgement of how bad it was could have been way off.

 

Yeah i know.. never get drunk

[Eivuwan]

Man, it was bad enough to give you a bruise and you're still wondering if he's worth it. Do you realize how bad it sounds to us? It doesn't matter if you guys are drunk or not.

[mishy]

I never seem to pick the right guys , the ones I am attracted to seem to be like this

 

I got a few texts from him yesterday saying he still wants to be friends..... And wait for it.............. And that if I played my cards right he might let me suck his dick...

[deathandtaxes]

I never seem to pick the right guys , the ones I am attracted to seem to be like this

 

I got a few texts from him yesterday saying he still wants to be friends..... And wait for it.............. And that if I played my cards right he might let me suck his dick...

 

 

You should be so honored to go down on him lmao

[Leigh 87]

I never seem to pick the right guys , the ones I am attracted to seem to be like this

 

I got a few texts from him yesterday saying he still wants to be friends..... And wait for it.............. And that if I played my cards right he might let me suck his dick...

 

 

 

Wtf..that's disgusting.

 

Why do u present yourself in a way that makes guys think that u have no self worth or respect for yourself?

[mishy]

Wtf..that's disgusting.

 

Why do u present yourself in a way that makes guys think that u have no self worth or respect for yourself?

 

Well I actually don't present myself that way

 

I am not responsible for his behaviour. He wrote the texts and he behaved the way he did

Edited October 8, 2013 by mishy

[Leigh 87]

Well I actually don't present myself that way

 

I am not responsible for his behaviour. He wrote the texts and he behaved the way he did

 

 

 

Good. Because you're an intelligent and nice girl.

 

It's just bizarre how u attract the very lowest of the low. Guys who are liars and jerks.

 

How about, next time u really solidify if a guy is into u as more than friends.

 

I really advise u take more time before getting sexual or talking about things of a sexual nature.

 

It's never healthy to let a guy say he's horny on the phone before or just affer u meet him just once.

 

You're worth way more than just sex, and talking about sexual things that early on before they get to know you will only end in disaster.

[mishy]

Double standards Leigh, if. A guy talks about sex it's ok but if a girl acts on his suggestions she is rejected. It's just BS

 

I got a text from him which sums up exactly what he is. It said that he still wants to go out with me as friends, and..... "If I play my cards right he might let me suck his dick...."

 

Yep,, that's right.