Am I the rebound girl??

[Tamaradee]

I've been seeing this guy for about 4 months now, and I am pretty sure that I love him. I haven't said it yet though, because he hasn't and I've been waiting for him to say it first. I'm also just not sure where he stands, when we first got together he was just so into me, and seemed so keen to see me all the time, now it's like he just doesn't care as much how much he sees me. He used to send me these cutesy texts all the time about how happy he was with me and how glad he was he met me, but those messages stopped like two months ago.

 

The main thing Im worried about though is if I am just his rebound. He got out of a two year relationship at the end of January, and then we met and started going out at the beginning of march. We went on like 5 casual dates over the span of two weeks and then right away he asked me to be "official". I don't think he is over his ex though. I found out that when she dumped him he stopped eating and sleeping properly for a whole month, even for the first few months of our relationship he still wasn't eating properly. He talks about her a lot, not lengthily conversations about her, but just thrown into our conversation " I only really got into sushi because of my ex" when we went out for sushi, or "this is my favourite wine, my ex's dad had it a lot when we would go there for dinner", or this weekend for example I have strep throat and he's telling me about how great his immune system is and not to worry about me passing it on and he says "my ex has [i don't remember what he said it was] and we never stopped fooling around and I didn't catch anything". I can also tell he is still REALLY bitter about her, he'll sometimes bring up bad things about her as well, and then just be like "but she was a ***** anyways". I know that since it was a two year relationship it's going to take time for him to get over her, but I'm worried that all I am is his human bandaid to help with that. He seems like he cares about me, he brought me ice cream when I was sick this weekend, and texts me all the time, but part of me is still hesitating.

 

She doesn't live here anymore and is dating someone else anyways, so it's not like I have to worry aboutnhommgoing back to her, I just don't know if I need to worry about him dumping me when he finally is over her, or if I will ever measure up to how much he obviously cared about her.

[lionness69]

You have to ask him directly what he is feeling. Tell him that is not fair to you to be with him physically but that his heart is over where she is. I believe that he still has issues unresolved about his ex. Tell him that you notice that he has change and that is better if he tells you the truth. And if he still is not over her, then he is selfish for not thinking about how he is affecting you.