irc333 Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 Okay, friend of mine, who tends to prefer to get to know women through these group outings....has gotten to know some of these ladies very well...he's got a good reputation, people like him and so on. He's a member of the Russian Culture Meetup group, and has been so for quite some time. He tells me when he gives a lady a good "ribbing" verbally, he follows it up with a playful slap on the rear. He said something about how it builds that "sexual tension" or even attraction if you will in women. I was like "Huh?? Are you sure about that?" He said he doesn't do it with married women or women with boyfriends, but apparently....they seem not to mind? I've actually SEEN him do this....he invited me, this woman, and she invited this married couple (people she knew from work) to go to an Art show outside. And when he did this to her, I saw no giggly reaction from her, in fact, she kept walking as if she never even felt it. I was looking at him like he was nuts, but I guess he can get away with it becuase he is well known in his social circle. I know how the women are going to respond here, lol....so what do the guys think? Any guys ever try this or is this just a nail in the coffin? Link to post Share on other sites
Object_a Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 No. Just no. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Object_a Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 That's assault in this country. You might want to let your friend know. Indeed. And if you did it at work it would be sexual harassment and you'd get your own arse* sued off! * - I'm guessing OP is from the UK or Aus/NZ because I only ever see USA people spell it "ass" 1 Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 Is your friend over 80 years old? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
sweetkiwi Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 Ugh please don't think this is okay. This is extremely disrespectful. And if it happened, and it has happened, to Mme I would tell the guy off and have to hold myself back from slapping him across the face. Only tools do this. Link to post Share on other sites
Radu Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 Uhhh, this is the kind of stuff you do very light and after many dates when she is in a good mood and you have already tried other playfull things. Basically when someone gives you acces to their personal space. It's the kind of thing you want to do when you are sure or close to sure it will work, or when you can pass it off as a joke [though good luck with this]. Otherwise, intruding into the personal space would feel to the other person as a ... violation of their privacy. Honestly, you need to experience this first hand to understand it. And then you'll understand why the other person might view it as assault. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
ChessPieceFace Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 I think certain types of men get away with it frequently with certain types of women. The "IT'S ASSAULT" response is naive and doesn't represent reality. Women are in denial about their core nature. Under the right circumstances, I believe a majority of women would respond positively to this kind of "assault" regardless of the standards inside their brain and broadcast by our culture. I can't imagine behaving this way, yet I know guys who would and they have more "success" with women than I do. Women like bad boys. Women like aggressive behavior. Women like men to act confident and in control. This behavior is all of those things, so most women will like it, whether they admit it, even to themselves. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
iKING Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 Sounds like a great way to get tazered or pepper sprayed. Some people really don't know proper human interaction, do they? 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Object_a Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 I think certain types of men get away with it frequently with certain types of women. The "IT'S ASSAULT" response is naive and doesn't represent reality. UGH UGH UGH. Are we really still having to debate whether touching someone sexually without their consent is acceptable? 3 Link to post Share on other sites
sweetkiwi Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 Go ahead and learn something for a change, slick... assault legal definition of assault. assault synonyms by the Free Online Law Dictionary. The best part of this being a legal issue is that the woman being slapped has grounds for kicking the living the tar out the assailant on this basis (self defense). Thanks Monica!!!! Good to know!!! They better hope I am in a good mood. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TaserTag Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 I'm sure that this would work on some girls (though I think that if the girl tries to ignore it and keeps walking like nothing happened, he probably made her very uncomfortable and she's just trying to ignore the confrontation), but not on most of the girls I know. It's likely that most of the women in these social groups just think this guy is a perv. He might think he's being really slick, but I'm sure they've noticed him grabbing at everyone's asses. So now he's that guy. I was abused as a child, so that probably colors my feelings on this as well. To me, getting slapped on the ass would basically equal out to a guy hitting me and abusing me sexually. I don't think that you should get into someone's personal space and start aggressively grabbing at them unless you know them very well already. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
StanMusial Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 All I can say is, if you want to pull a stunt like that, you better be very, very, very, VERY good-looking. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Radu Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 I think certain types of men get away with it frequently with certain types of women. The "IT'S ASSAULT" response is naive and doesn't represent reality. Women are in denial about their core nature. Under the right circumstances, I believe a majority of women would respond positively to this kind of "assault" regardless of the standards inside their brain and broadcast by our culture. I can't imagine behaving this way, yet I know guys who would and they have more "success" with women than I do. Women like bad boys. Women like aggressive behavior. Women like men to act confident and in control. This behavior is all of those things, so most women will like it, whether they admit it, even to themselves. I actually agree with this. I was recently out for a beer with some of the ppl from school. 3 girls, 2 guys. 31 [single, cute looking, petite], 21 [single, cute looking, curvy], 28 [bf, also curvy] the ages of the girls. 30 and 28, the ages of the guys. The other guy takes good care of himself, works as a security guard [a bit above the average grunt], is married and has 2 kids. Pics on his cellphone of the kids and wife. Then things started appearing : - he lost his wedding ring a while back - he started playing with the 21yr old - 20min late he was very touchy feely with her - another 20min, and he had his hands all over her There was no slap, but i have a feeling that both me and the other girls knew what was going on. I'm happy that i found what he was doing quite disgusting from a moral pov ... he's married with kids. I'm also happy i did not say anything [very important] and that i managed to fight my usual recluse self. It was very interesting watching him work on seducing her, i'm sure she had some fantasies that night. Link to post Share on other sites
Radu Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 There are definitely a few people around here I would welcome a slap from, for just that reason!! (it really would be a very small price to pay lol!) Turn around miss, i'd like to see you do something from 5000 miles away. Thanks Monica!!!! Good to know!!! They better hope I am in a good mood. Or else they would end up on the floor with you thinking 'oh ****' like the last one ? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ChessPieceFace Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 Sounds like a great way to get tazered or pepper sprayed. Some people really don't know proper human interaction, do they? UGH UGH UGH. Are we really still having to debate whether touching someone sexually without their consent is acceptable? You find the general behavior of the human race proper and acceptable? Link to post Share on other sites
StanMusial Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 I actually agree with this. I was recently out for a beer with some of the ppl from school. 3 girls, 2 guys. 31 [single, cute looking, petite], 21 [single, cute looking, curvy], 28 [bf, also curvy] the ages of the girls. 30 and 28, the ages of the guys. The other guy takes good care of himself, works as a security guard [a bit above the average grunt], is married and has 2 kids. Pics on his cellphone of the kids and wife. Then things started appearing : - he lost his wedding ring a while back - he started playing with the 21yr old - 20min late he was very touchy feely with her - another 20min, and he had his hands all over her There was no slap, but i have a feeling that both me and the other girls knew what was going on. I'm happy that i found what he was doing quite disgusting from a moral pov ... he's married with kids. I'm also happy i did not say anything [very important] and that i managed to fight my usual recluse self. It was very interesting watching him work on seducing her, i'm sure she had some fantasies that night. I have seen this happen before. The horn-dog married dude drooling over the younger, hotter babies. The newly-married guy getting close and comfortable with the new hot girl at work. Or someone nudging you in the bar saying "Look, so-and-so just put his wedding band in his pocket ha ha." Those guys just do what they do, before or after marriage, I doubt the vows mean much to them anyway. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TheGuard13 Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 Oh, it'll build tension. But not usually the kind he wants. Link to post Share on other sites
Bengal Tiger Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 There are definitely a few people around here I would welcome a slap from, for just that reason!! (it really would be a very small price to pay lol!) That actually sounds really hot. So MonicaElise, when are you free to meet up for a drink? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
MrCasanova Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 Okay, friend of mine, who tends to prefer to get to know women through these group outings....has gotten to know some of these ladies very well...he's got a good reputation, people like him and so on. He's a member of the Russian Culture Meetup group, and has been so for quite some time. He tells me when he gives a lady a good "ribbing" verbally, he follows it up with a playful slap on the rear. He said something about how it builds that "sexual tension" or even attraction if you will in women. I was like "Huh?? Are you sure about that?" He said he doesn't do it with married women or women with boyfriends, but apparently....they seem not to mind? I've actually SEEN him do this....he invited me, this woman, and she invited this married couple (people she knew from work) to go to an Art show outside. And when he did this to her, I saw no giggly reaction from her, in fact, she kept walking as if she never even felt it. I was looking at him like he was nuts, but I guess he can get away with it becuase he is well known in his social circle. I know how the women are going to respond here, lol....so what do the guys think? Any guys ever try this or is this just a nail in the coffin? Sounds like your friend is asking for a slap in the face. You may want to talk him out of that. Link to post Share on other sites
harnold Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 I think certain types of men get away with it frequently with certain types of women. The "IT'S ASSAULT" response is naive and doesn't represent reality. Women are in denial about their core nature. Under the right circumstances, I believe a majority of women would respond positively to this kind of "assault" regardless of the standards inside their brain and broadcast by our culture. This. It works just fine if you have the appropriate personality (extroverted, flirty, etc). If youre a ****ing weirdo/timid type and walk up to some chick and slap her on the ass, then yeah its inappropriate. Which may be why so many people on this thread/forum seem to be so aghast at these type of approaches... it doesn't suit their personality. For all the women throwing their arms into the air in total outrage, explain to everyone else, then, how so many people are able to consistently act like and be very successful with women without getting their ass charged time and time again. And no, the girl doesn't have to be a whore/young to be responsive to this type of behavior either. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ThaWholigan Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 Actually there are those who do respond to it - but they aren't a majority. Generally that's a very risky move to create sexual tension - if you've been on a few dates then you can push boundaries like that, but generally that kind of touch is a bit extreme. But yeah, I've seen it work, even someone like me who is reserved - I grabbed ass the first time I met one girl . But yeah, it's risky, I wouldn't do it on a whim unless you know it will be received well. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
neveragain34 Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 The guy I'm dating did that to me around our 10th date and I found it puzzling, but not insulting. I was puzzled because I thought I should be offended, but I wasn't. I took it as playful, but it definitely had no effect on sexual buildup; that is there regardless since we haven't slept together! Lol. Link to post Share on other sites
Disenchantedly Yours Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 I know how the women are going to respond here, lol....so what do the guys think? Any guys ever try this or is this just a nail in the coffin? Bascially Ladies, our opinions of our own butts getting slapped is unimportant. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Disenchantedly Yours Posted March 16, 2013 Share Posted March 16, 2013 Women are in denial about their core nature. Under the right circumstances, I believe a majority of women would respond positively to this kind of "assault" regardless of the standards inside their brain and broadcast by our culture. Confirmation that our opinions of our butts getting slapped are unimportant. Just give all us ladies some lollipops that we can chew on while we twirl our hair and nodd our heads as the guys tell us what women are *actually* about. It is okay for a long-standing boyfriend to slap my butt playfully. It does not turn me on but it's not offensive ...if he is already an established boyfriend. It is not okay for random men to slap my butt like this was the 1920s and he was asking me to go fetch him another cigar. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Author irc333 Posted March 17, 2013 Author Share Posted March 17, 2013 For all the women throwing their arms into the air in total outrage, explain to everyone else, then, how so many people are able to consistently act like and be very successful with women without getting their ass charged time and time again. I don't know if anyone recalls the TV show "Eliminidate" where a woman goes out with 3 guys (or was it 5)? It was whittled down to 2 guys, one guy was a gentleman-like, civilized human being that would indeed by the long term boyfriend (even husband) material for this woman. The other was some jock douche'. They were all in a hot tub together talking....then the jock decides to do a GENIUS move....he takes his swim trunks off....they blur out his "member" and he wiggles his penis in her face. The "nice guy" thinks "What a douche bag, I got this woman....EASY...easy win for me! Yay!" Then, at the end of the show.....she picks her final man. Guess who it was. The dick wiggler. LOL It was that edgy, bad boy, alpha male MOVE he made to win her over. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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