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He takes hours and hours to text me back...should i ditch him?


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Old 19th February 2013, 10:18 PM   #16
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Ill play devils advicit.

I enjoy my alone time. Durring which I produce music id rather not worry about some insecure girl stressing because i dont respond for few hours. If it is really important pick up the phone and call me.
What is the difference though? How they communicate isn't as important. It's what they communicate that matters.

Text message, phone call, letter in a bottle, smoke signals. It's the message that should be the focus, not how you got the message.
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Old 19th February 2013, 10:23 PM   #17
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What is the difference though? How they communicate isn't as important. It's what they communicate that matters.

Text message, phone call, letter in a bottle, smoke signals. It's the message that should be the focus, not how you got the message.
I dont have a problem with texting. in fact i quite like it if i want to tell a funny joke or some little tid bit of information. what bothers me is when you are expected to respond to respond to that text immediately. You dont have to be in constant contact with your significant other. People have other things in there life besides you.

Spending real time to together is what is important not sending a hey "smily face" and expecting an immediate response.
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Old 19th February 2013, 10:26 PM   #18
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Because not everyone sits there looking at their phone waiting for a text message. My girlfriend Is peeved it took me three hours to respond yesterday. I'm not going to dump her because we have different ideas on communication.
Thats right. If his friends complain he's a bit of a slacko when it comes to getting back to them or meeting them on time, then it seems like this is his nature and its not some sort of 'treat em mean keep em keen' strategy he's playing at or because he is busy chasing other girls or is it necessarily a case of him not finding you desirable as a gf (tho possible). Its likely this is his nature and a different style of communication. He could still have what you want in a great bf, as long as you can deal with the less then prompt communication. Some guys dont want to be at beck and call.
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Old 19th February 2013, 10:30 PM   #19
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I never text a girl right back it just makes you seem like I am waiting all day for a girls text.


I will never text a girl back until 10-30 min goes by depending on how much a care about her.

As time goes on and we become a couple then i will text asap.
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Old 19th February 2013, 10:36 PM   #20
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I never text a girl right back it just makes you seem like I am waiting all day for a girls text.


I will never text a girl back until 10-30 min goes by depending on how much a care about her.

As time goes on and we become a couple then i will text asap.
Does this bother you?

How would you feel if a girl had the same mentality. You make people wait for a response based on how much you like them?

I understand that texting back fast gives off an illusion of "neediness" but If im not busy and want to have a conversation then i will text back when i get it.

Feels so fake the way you describe it
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Old 19th February 2013, 10:42 PM   #21
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I would NOT date him. Had the same issue with one guy....he was a great guy, but would take hours and hours to text. At some point took 24 hours. WTH? NOBODY is that busy.

I'm sure there are people out there that can deal with it. I on the other hand text back within 2 hour usually (and that's when I'm super busy) and expect the same from others.
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Old 19th February 2013, 10:45 PM   #22
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I would NOT date him. Had the same issue with one guy....he was a great guy, but would take hours and hours to text. At some point took 24 hours. WTH? NOBODY is that busy.

I'm sure there are people out there that can deal with it. I on the other hand text back within 2 hour usually (and that's when I'm super busy) and expect the same from others.
Everyone has there priorities. But if someone takes more then a day to respond they, dont care very much. But a few hours is fine.
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Old 19th February 2013, 10:47 PM   #23
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Everyone has there priorities. But if someone takes more then a day to respond they, dont care very much. But a few hours is fine.
I don't think 12 hours is fine.
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Old 19th February 2013, 10:49 PM   #24
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Does this bother you?

How would you feel if a girl had the same mentality. You make people wait for a response based on how much you like them?

I understand that texting back fast gives off an illusion of "neediness" but If im not busy and want to have a conversation then i will text back when i get it.

Feels so fake the way you describe it

well if i just meet her I would text back 5-10 min so i do not seem to available.

I am busy all the time and if i was not i act like i was.

same goes for if we only meet a week ago if she called I would not pick up the phone and have her leave a message or get iton the last ring.

I call back in a few min 1-3 tops.

If i get back to her to fast she think I am not interesting and to predictable.
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Old 19th February 2013, 10:52 PM   #25
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If it's really just a difference in ideas about texting, then you could try not using texting as a way of communicating. If you need to talk, call and speak or leave a voicemail, and see how that works out.
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Old 19th February 2013, 10:56 PM   #26
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I would NOT date him. Had the same issue with one guy....he was a great guy, but would take hours and hours to text. At some point took 24 hours. WTH? NOBODY is that busy.
I am that busy but on the other hand i am up 20 hours out of 24 so texting is back not a problem.
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Old 19th February 2013, 10:58 PM   #27
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Your first mistake I noticed even in the thread title. You are interested in this guy so you..............text him. Unless you are 14 my advice is use that silly little thing that we used to call a phone and talk to him the way a grown up does. Texting is the most impersonal thing you can possibly do if you want to get to know someone. It is another way of saying "I am too busy for you now, but in between things I am doing I might drop you a line". Texting has no rules. It requires no emotion. If you want a real relationship you should pick up a phone and call him.
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Old 19th February 2013, 10:58 PM   #28
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well if i just meet her I would text back 5-10 min so i do not seem to available.

I am busy all the time and if i was not i act like i was.

same goes for if we only meet a week ago if she called I would not pick up the phone and have her leave a message or get iton the last ring.

I call back in a few min 1-3 tops.

If i get back to her to fast she think I am not interesting and to predictable.
I personally feel like this strategy is a double edged blade. If a girl knows you are busy and a motivated person i doubt she would criticize you for responding to fast. In fact in certain situations it can actually help you.

Another aspect would be would you actually care to have a romantic relationship with a girl who would place stock on something as trivial as that? Real worth while people who are mature and developed will not find fault in you for texting back quickly.
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Old 19th February 2013, 11:08 PM   #29
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I personally feel like this strategy is a double edged blade. If a girl knows you are busy and a motivated person i doubt she would criticize you for responding to fast. In fact in certain situations it can actually help you.

Another aspect would be would you actually care to have a romantic relationship with a girl who would place stock on something as trivial as that? Real worth while people who are mature and developed will not find fault in you for texting back quickly.
I just rather not text her back right away since i never have my phone on me.
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Old 19th February 2013, 11:11 PM   #30
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Reasons why guys don't get back to me-
Their batteries died
They lost their phones
They broke their phones
Their dogs ate their phones
They work a 12 hour shift that require their phones to be off


Or they're really not interested?

As far as I'm aware of, anyone with a smartphone is prone to texting because one, it is an addiction and there is mildly amusing about sneaking in a few texts while at work.

OP, what's his day job?

I think there's a reason why he takes a long time to text back a 12-hour gap just seems way too excessive, doesn't it?
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