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New girlfriend going away on a 6 week trip and I'm a mess!


LittleMonkey

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LittleMonkey

Hey,

 

So I met this amazing girl about 3 weeks ago, we clicked, and met again and again, expressed our emotions (real, I've never felt like this before) when we talked she mirrored my emotions, even said how she felt about me first.

 

However, it's really difficult to know what's up with her, she doesn't answer phone calls (says it's because she has so many things to do before the trip) She's going on a 6 week trip abroad. Normally I don't think I'd be so stressed, it's because except for the days when we met, communications with her have been really scarce, only texts (which she doesn't always reply to) and I can never be sure I'll see her until I'm actually seeing her. She said when she'll be abroad she won't have all these things to arrange and we'll talk a lot more on skype etc.

 

She really said she loves me and wants to be with me all the time, but when I text her I really don't want to feel like I'm bugging her.

 

She flies tomorrow evening, which means I have only today to be with her, and I don't know what's going on with that. I texted her a few hours ago "Good morning my sweet :) What's up today?" (she said before she hopes to be here today) No answer..

 

Am I annoying her? (when we talked she said she's never annoyed by my texts/calls, it's just that she was really busy, she even said she was afraid I'll forget about her)

 

I want to see her before the trip, I told her I'll be with her on the airport, (also made a drawing of our first kiss -she loves my drawings, that and a letter to read on the airplane)

 

I keep being afraid she'll forget about me and fly without seeing me, and that she won't talk to me while on the trip.

 

Help!

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You've only known each other for three weeks. That's a very, very short amount of time. I think that it's impossible to know someone well enough after only three weeks to be saying "I love you." You might have those feelings, but I think it is a big mistake to share them and act on them until you know her better.

 

So, take a few steps back and realize that at this point, this is a fun, casual fling that might not go anywhere. If you take that approach, you won't be worrying about it all the time and you won't be as heartbroken if/when it ends.

 

Speaking of it ending, I'm sorry to tell you that I'm very sure that she does not take this relationship as seriously as you do. If she did, she would make absolutely certain to make real, firm plans to see you before she leaves. She wouldn't let your texts and calls go unanswered for long periods of time, even if she was very busy. She would not have ignored your text that basically asked her, "What are you doing today?"

 

She's actually being quite cruel toward you. She gives you false hope, makes plans then flakes, keeps you constantly on edge, and blows you off on her last day in town. A person who is genuinely interested in you would not do those things. Prepare yourself for not hearing a peep out of her while she's away. If you think she's too busy for you now, wait until she's abroad, doing new things and meeting new people and doing what one does on vacation. She's not going to suddenly start making time for you.

 

This is not a serious relationship, so it would be a mistake to treat it like one.

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YellowShark

You just met. Now you are pestering her with calls and texts. Sounds like those calls and texts are pushing her away from you. That said it only takes a minute to reply to a text so don't buy the "I'm too busy to reply" BS. Nobody is too busy to reply to a text unless they are doing brain surgery. ;)

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LittleMonkey
You just met. Now you are pestering her with calls and texts. Sounds like those calls and texts are pushing her away from you. That said it only takes a minute to reply to a text so don't buy the "I'm too busy to reply" BS. Nobody is too busy to reply to a text unless they are doing brain surgery. ;)

 

So what do I do? I would wait more but the upcoming flight... I don't want to lose her. When we met she said I really didn't bug her with calls and stuff.

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YellowShark
So what do I do? I would wait more but the upcoming flight... I don't want to lose her. When we met she said I really didn't bug her with calls and stuff.

 

Lose her? You met 3 weeks ago. You don't even "have" her. ;)

 

Here's what you do. Nothing. Women don't get turned on by needy clingy guys. It pushes them away. So tell her you really like her, want to date when she returns and that's it. You do nothing after that. Then the ball is in her court. If she is really interested she will contact you. If she doesn't then there are a few billion other women on Earth to choose from. ;)

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Wow I say good thing she is going away for 6 weeks because you need to get a grip.

 

It's been 3 weeks. You barely know her, you guys are not in love! Geez, slow your roll. I agree you need to back off, she doesn't even sound that interested if she is not answering your calls / texts. Why don't you let her come to you a bit.

 

Also, when words and actions don't match up (I love you, I want to spend all my time with you!! but then doesn't hang out with you or talk to you) then you go by the worst one (usually actions) and believe that.

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