Desensitized Posted March 29, 2012 Share Posted March 29, 2012 So today, I decided to go to my friend's new place and she didn't tell me she had a new roommate. She is really hot... anyways, I went back to my friend's place after I knew she wasn't there (because she was with me) and I pretended that I didn't know that my friend wasn't at her place, and then after making small talk about me "not knowing" where my friend was, I complimented her, told her that my friend told me good things about her, and that I wanted to take her out for coffee sometime. She said yes, and she gave me her number. I don't know what made me do this, but I did. I'm normally bad when it comes to straight up starting a conversation and keeping it going (and not messing up; I was pretty smooth, surprisingly), and I really don't know what compelled me to do so. Only sort of thing that makes me uncomfortable is that she is the exact same height as me, but meh. I can deal with it I guess. Not like I know where this is going anyway, but I am extremely happy to have gotten the balls to just cold approach? (I think that's the term). Link to post Share on other sites
Pyro Posted March 29, 2012 Share Posted March 29, 2012 Best of luck to you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Desensitized Posted March 29, 2012 Author Share Posted March 29, 2012 Best of luck to you. Thank youuu Link to post Share on other sites
Kuen Posted March 29, 2012 Share Posted March 29, 2012 Wow, your great man! such a nice move you got. I hope you too could have a lovely day in your out. Best of luck... Link to post Share on other sites
Million.to.1 Posted March 29, 2012 Share Posted March 29, 2012 The irony of the height issue mentioned here is beyond hilarious. Well-done OP. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Desensitized Posted March 30, 2012 Author Share Posted March 30, 2012 she blew me off... woooo! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
AIDsFan1488 Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 Maybe you weren't confident enough. It's always the mans fault. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Desensitized Posted March 30, 2012 Author Share Posted March 30, 2012 *shrug* I'm annoyed. Link to post Share on other sites
Oxy Moronovich Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 she blew me off... woooo! How'd she blow you off? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Desensitized Posted March 30, 2012 Author Share Posted March 30, 2012 well, i texted her this morning because I didn't want to seem overly eager by arranging a date yesterday, so I did. She texted me back, etc, and then she stopped responding. I asked her if she wanted to go to the gym with me today as well, but she never responded. This was all about 9 hours ago. She stopped responding after she asked me how my day was... whatever. Link to post Share on other sites
Oxy Moronovich Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 Perhaps she think you called her too early. Maybe it would have been best to wait until tomorrow to contact her. And when you contact her, make sure it's with her phone number. Save the texting til when you're a couple. Link to post Share on other sites
AIDsFan1488 Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 Well man, don't feel too bad, that's the game. Unless you're really tall, wealthy, or amazing looking you have to expect this: For every 10 women you ask for a number, 1 will give you a real one and respond. For every 10 women who give you a real one and respond, 1 will translate into a date. For every 10 women who accept a date, 1 will actually go beyond 1 date. Depending on how many you've asked out, give yourself some credit for getting as far as you did. Link to post Share on other sites
AIDsFan1488 Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 Perhaps she think you called her too early. Maybe it would have been best to wait until tomorrow to contact her. And when you contact her, make sure it's with her phone number. Save the texting til when you're a couple. Give me a break with this stupid PUA type of advice. If a woman is actually interested in a man, she won't care what time he contacts her. If she doesn't care, no time will ever be the right time to contact her 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Desensitized Posted March 30, 2012 Author Share Posted March 30, 2012 Meh. Honestly, I am just tired of having to play some sort of game to get what I want. "Call her two days from now, not one!" Or "act like a jerk to her and she will want you." Whatever. Bottom line is, is that I don't have the energy to do this right now, nor the time. I didn't do anything wrong in my book. I was honest, nice, striked up a convo, and I did what I had to do. School is a full time job anyway, maybe i'll start looking again when I'm done with my degree. Link to post Share on other sites
Feelsgoodman Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 Give me a break with this stupid PUA type of advice. If a woman is actually interested in a man, she won't care what time he contacts her. If she doesn't care, no time will ever be the right time to contact her I have to agree with this. From my experience, if a girl is interested, you can contact her at 4 am and she'd get back to you pronto. Most likely the girl gave you her phone number because she didn't want to be "mean" to her roommate's friend. There is nothing more a woman cares about than how her actions are going to be judged by other women. And according to the feminine logic, stringing you along and then disappearing is the 'polite' way of rejecting you (while telling you outright that she is not interested would be considered 'mean'). Link to post Share on other sites
AIDsFan1488 Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 I have to agree with this. From my experience, if a girl is interested, you can contact her at 4 am and she'd get back to you pronto. Most likely the girl gave you her phone number because she didn't want to be "mean" to her roommate's friend. There is nothing more a woman cares about than how her actions are going to be judged by other women. And according to the feminine logic, stringing you along and then disappearing is the 'polite' way of rejecting you (while telling you outright that she is not interested would be considered 'mean'). Definitely, and it's annoying. It's better to just reject me there and then, over getting my hopes up and excited only to blow me off later on. I don't think it's just about other women, I think some women like to attention whore. If you take down her number and ask her out, its a huge ego boost for the woman. Dating in the modern world for us young men = digging through a mountain of attention whores. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Desensitized Posted March 30, 2012 Author Share Posted March 30, 2012 Definitely, and it's annoying. It's better to just reject me there and then, over getting my hopes up and excited only to blow me off later on. I don't think it's just about other women, I think some women like to attention whore. If you take down her number and ask her out, its a huge ego boost for the woman. Dating in the modern world for us young men = digging through a mountain of attention whores. Yeah, I'd prefer if they'd just told me no immediately as well. Oh well. On the plus side though, I know this is sort of contradictory to what I stated earlier, but I actually had a relatively long and intellectual conversation not too long ago with this cute girl. Got her number and I asked her if she would like to grab coffee sometime soon. She said yeah, but this time, I'm not looking to anything to come about this. Hopefully it's not another dud. Link to post Share on other sites
Feelsgoodman Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 I don't think it's just about other women, I think some women like to attention whore. If you take down her number and ask her out, its a huge ego boost for the woman. Dating in the modern world for us young men = digging through a mountain of attention whores. Attention whoring is definitely a factor as well. That's why I advise other men to avoid the cold approach altogether. It's a low probability strategy that does little more than provide an ego boost for women. There's an undeserved "mystique" surrounding the idea of the cold approach. As if it's how things have been done by real men since time immemorial. In reality, this could couldn't be farther from the truth. Up until the 20th century, it was considered completely inappropriate to cold approach an unfamiliar woman (unless she was a prostitute). 99% of all marriages were arranged. Trying to equate cold approach with "manliness" is a misguided proposition. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Desensitized Posted March 30, 2012 Author Share Posted March 30, 2012 Attention whoring is definitely a factor as well. That's why I advise other men to avoid the cold approach altogether. It's a low probability strategy that does little more than provide an ego boost for women. There's an undeserved "mystique" surrounding the idea of the cold approach. As if it's how things have been done by real men since time immemorial. In reality, this could couldn't be farther from the truth. Up until the 20th century, it was considered completely inappropriate to cold approach an unfamiliar woman (unless she was a prostitute). 99% of all marriages were arranged. Trying to equate cold approach with "manliness" is a misguided proposition. So am I doing it wrong? Link to post Share on other sites
Feelsgoodman Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 So am I doing it wrong? The results should speak for themselves. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Desensitized Posted March 30, 2012 Author Share Posted March 30, 2012 The results should speak for themselves. Ouch. Well, I guess I should be friendly and get to know them first before completely immersing myself in the water by asking them out for coffee or something. I guess I just didn't see the harm in asking someone out for coffee. I mean, it's just coffee. I guess I can shift from asking girls cute girls out to coffee to using the cold approach to get to know the women I am interested in. Good call. Link to post Share on other sites
Feelsgoodman Posted March 30, 2012 Share Posted March 30, 2012 Ouch. Well, I guess I should be friendly and get to know them first before completely immersing myself in the water by asking them out for coffee or something. I guess I just didn't see the harm in asking someone out for coffee. I mean, it's just coffee. I guess I can shift from asking girls cute girls out to coffee to using the cold approach to get to know the women I am interested in. Good call. Yes, it's better to get to know them first. From my experience, if a girl is attracted to you, she'll make it very clear. THEN you move in for the kill. Link to post Share on other sites
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