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Friends with benefits, but unable to perform the benefits part


dave22

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I had wanted to date this friend of mine for a long time. A few weeks ago she said she wasn't ready for a relationship but that we could be friends with benefits. Well, that may not have been exactly what I wanted, but how could I turn that down?

 

Well, the first time we got that far, I was nervous and I couldn't get it up (thank fully this forum is anonymous). It didn't seem to matter too much. We both joked about it and I think we both realized that it happens sometimes. But it continued to happen. At first she really enjoyed everything else we did (I won't give any more details than that on here, of course). But as time has gone on I can tell she has become more disappointed and I have become more frustrated.

 

I do like the other parts of it. I always liked hanging out with her, and we have been doing that more now. I like holding hands and kissing (if it sounds like this is more than just friends with benefits, it seems like that to me too), but I want more of course and I worry if something doesn't work soon I will lose my chance. What is the matter with me? And how can I make sure she doesn't give up on this until the problem is solved?

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OP, you have a problem. You voluntarily put yourself in a sticky situation where you're capable of falling for this girl. It does not matter that you cannot perform, you're just selling yourself short because 1, your heart isn't in it for a fwb situation and 2, she's going to go away either way.

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