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Ready to date again and fancy guy in class


reptilelover88

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reptilelover88

I now feel like I'm ready to date again after breaking up with my boyfriend in early December (and getting lots of advice and support on here - thanks! :cool:).

 

There's this guy on my course that I take about 3 classes a week with. I liked him as soon as I met him back in September but I was still with my ex then. I fancied him and we also got on extremely well with lots of things in common. We talked a fair bit last term to and from class but there were always lots of other people around so it never really got a chance to go anywhere. There was one occasion where we met at a drinks party one evening and we talked for hours but he went home alone around midnight as he had an early start the next morning (and perhaps because I had made it clear that I had a boyfriend).

 

Now that I'm single, I'm trying to talk to him more without looking too obvious. I happened to sit near him yesterday (I came in late and a bit flustered so honestly didn't notice where I was sitting!) and he greeted me with a huge smile and 'hello beautiful'! We talked a lot and he mentioned that it was a shame that he hadn't been able to come to a house party I held for New Year. He said that he hoped to be able to come to another one! When class ended I didn't want to seem too keen because we had talked so much already so I walked home with one of my female friends and he walked close behind.

 

I really like this guy and I feel nervous talking to him, although it's also very fun. He is an independent and slightly eccentric sort of person and I know that he very much enjoys his own company. I don't really know what to think. I definitely feel a spark with him but could it be that he also feels it? If so, what should I do? I'd like to go for a coffee with him after class one day but I sort of feel like he has to do the asking. I chased my ex from the start and it didn't work out... I basically ended up with an uninterested and non-committed guy! So if I'm going to go out with this new guy I want to feel like he's keen too. Any suggestions?

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If you want him, go after him. Based on the way he talks to you, I think it is safe to say that he likes you. While in class, ask him to grab some coffee with you after class. If he's busy at least he knows you're interested. He only knows you as the hot girl with the boyfriend, and even though you're single, he probably doesn't want to rush you. You jut got out of a relationship so the ball is in your court.

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reptilelover88

Well, I took the plunge and asked him to a boxing match at the weekend, and he said yes! I know a boxing match sounds quite random but one of our mutual friends is fighting so it seemed like a good event to go to anyway. I'm still not certain that he likes me, though. Recently he's been calling me 'doll' and seeming very pleased whenever he sees me but I'm still cautious about possibly misinterpreting what could just be friendliness...

 

Anyway, I'm excited about the boxing match but also really nervous! I also have a major dilemma over what to wear. I normally have quite a formal style (think Blair Waldorf) and so does the guy I like. However, I think if I were overdressed at a boxing match I'd feel very silly. So I'm thinking of dressing down on this occasion, maybe tight jeans, low heels and a nice top. What do you all think?

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I chased my ex from the start and it didn't work out... I basically ended up with an uninterested and non-committed guy! So if I'm going to go out with this new guy I want to feel like he's keen too. Any suggestions?

 

That's not because of the way you pursued him. It's just because of the way the cards fell.

 

Women know what they want. You managed to bag the first guy by initiating. Why not do it again?

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Well, I took the plunge and asked him to a boxing match at the weekend, and he said yes! I know a boxing match sounds quite random but one of our mutual friends is fighting so it seemed like a good event to go to anyway. I'm still not certain that he likes me, though. Recently he's been calling me 'doll' and seeming very pleased whenever he sees me but I'm still cautious about possibly misinterpreting what could just be friendliness...

 

Anyway, I'm excited about the boxing match but also really nervous! I also have a major dilemma over what to wear. I normally have quite a formal style (think Blair Waldorf) and so does the guy I like. However, I think if I were overdressed at a boxing match I'd feel very silly. So I'm thinking of dressing down on this occasion, maybe tight jeans, low heels and a nice top. What do you all think?

Its perfectly fine and a good thing for a girl to initiate but she must never chase!

 

You have done your part in letting him know that you are interested. Now let him do his part in proving his own interest toward you. Dont initiate a second date. Its his turn.

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  • 2 weeks later...
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reptilelover88

I thought I'd post an update because I often read old threads on here and think 'what happened?'. Basically, we went to the boxing match (I wore a red lace top and some skinny jeans in the end and that was perfect) and it was fun but a total disaster date-wise. The guy I liked hugged me and complimented me on my appearance when I arrived (so far so good) but then pretty much the next thing out of his mouth was that women shouldn't be allowed to attend boxing matches! Unfortunately he was serious, and any attraction I once had for him vanished in that moment. I'm glad I managed to think with my head rather than my heart for once. Like I said, we had a good night and he was the perfect gentleman apart from that comment but I felt like it was all show and nothing underneath. I'm glad I found out about his misogyny sooner rather than later. He hasn't spoken to me since so clearly he feels the same way! I'm glad this situation got straightened out without me getting hurt or feeling like I made a fool of myself.

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