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Why Would He Ask if I Was Seeing Someone Else?


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Old 6th June 2011, 2:27 PM   #1
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Why Would He Ask if I Was Seeing Someone Else?

had been talkin to a guy for over a month. I thought we were really hitting it off.
Then, he disappeared. I went from texts every day to maybe once a week.
After three weeks like this, I gave up on the whole thing. Of course, as soon as I had given up, he started texting more. I've heard from him several times in the last few days.

At one point we mentioned kissing ... and he said "I'm surprised you haven't found someone else by now."
I said "I was talking about kissing YOU"
He said "I know, I was asking whether or not you've found someone else 2 kiss by now."
I said "I haven't really been looking."

It seemed sort of a surprising question.
Guys are so confusing.
Any ideas why he would ask?
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Old 6th June 2011, 2:32 PM   #2
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big red flag if he disappears for a month. he doesn't sound like he's really interested. I would either ask him or move on.
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Old 6th June 2011, 2:39 PM   #3
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It sounds like he's trying to figure whether to keep pursuing you or not.
Though, from the sound of it, he hasn't really been pursuing all that ardently (a single text in a week?)

Lots of guys I know would be really disappointed if a girl they were into was dating someone else. It sounds like he's trying to figure this out, but it doesn't seem like (from your story) he's phased by that possibility at all.. (it actually sounds like he was expecting you to start seeing someone else)... Sounds really confusing.. lots of mixed messages here. I'd say keep looking elsewhere until he takes dating you a little more seriously..
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Old 6th June 2011, 2:42 PM   #4
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He didn't disappear completely, the communication was just A LOT less for a few weeks. I had lost interest because of this. On his behalf, though, he did get a new job during those few weeks. I've only known him for a short time, so technically he doesn't owe me anything.
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Old 6th June 2011, 2:48 PM   #5
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Not enough facts to definitively conclude why the frequency of calls/texts decreased. Was he the one to always initiate conversations or did you initiate some too?

Contrary to popular opinion, not all guys like to chase. If you never texted or called him first, he could have interpreted it as a lack of enthusiasm on your part.
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Old 6th June 2011, 2:55 PM   #6
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Yes, I did text and call him with only the once a week responses. The few texts I got did specify that he was sorry for being out of touch and that he was really busy with work, etc.

Right now I'm curious why he'd ask me about someone else. He's never even mentioned other guys.
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Old 6th June 2011, 2:56 PM   #7
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You just have to ask him. And don't text too much. Get some real phone/face to face time. So much can be misread on texting.
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Old 6th June 2011, 5:28 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by frutpebbles View Post
Yes, I did text and call him with only the once a week responses. The few texts I got did specify that he was sorry for being out of touch and that he was really busy with work, etc.

Right now I'm curious why he'd ask me about someone else. He's never even mentioned other guys.
for whatever reason he wasn't that interested before but now he is.

if i had to bet that's what i'd bet on.
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