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dating an Italian man


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Old 5th December 2010, 10:24 AM   #1
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dating an Italian man

So, I met a man at a community volunteer opportunity who is Italian and about 10 years older than I am. We went on our first date yesterday. He is charming, responsible, generous, handsome, a great listener, passionate and kind to people. We went out to a city wide Christmas night where stores and museums are open and he was friendly and kind to everyone, from the door opener to the person making cocoa. We had lots to talk about and lots of shared interest in family, travel and sports.

I feel shallow but there is one thing I am having trouble getting over. He wore an open necked zip up sweater, unzipped to show his chest and a gold chain. I don't like that look. It is a little over the top to me but I weigh it against everything else and everything else cancels it out. But, I know my two twenty something kids would not approve - my sister dated someone who dressed like that and they made fun of him behind his back (which I stopped right away).

It is way too early to figure out if I should ever state my preference. I guess I just want to date him more and perhaps I can share my opinion later in the relationship. I feel like a shallow person. Gee whiz. Ideas?
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Old 5th December 2010, 10:27 AM   #2
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Do what women do best - manipulate him.
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Old 5th December 2010, 10:38 AM   #3
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Yes, it's too early to state your preferences about a man's style.

If it bugs you this much, I will be surprised if you'll be able to get past it.

My boyfriend had a ridiculous personal style when we met, in my opinion. My daughter was horrified, and all my friends who knew my gorgeous ex husband and hip, styling former boyfriends could not believe it. I, though, found it endearing and amusing. Really.

Now we have been together for a while and I have given him some nice gifts of clothing that I would like to see him wear. He is flattered and does wear them (he is highly susceptible to praise!) The laugh inspiring style is going away.

In the interest of full disclosure, I'm pretty sure he did not love my own personal style either, at first. He typically liked a completely different style of woman - one that pretty much matched his own. So he was probably making concessions as well.

Your new date might be secretly wishing you presented yourself like a Guidette:http://www.nydailynews.com/gossip/20...er_temper.html
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Old 5th December 2010, 10:39 AM   #4
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That's the last thing I want to do. I don't believe in doing that or trying to change people. I am just trying to figure out why I am reacting this way.
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Old 5th December 2010, 10:43 AM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sandcast123 View Post
That's the last thing I want to do. I don't believe in doing that or trying to change people. I am just trying to figure out why I am reacting this way.
I know you don't want to do that but look at it like you are doing the community a service.
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Old 5th December 2010, 10:55 AM   #6
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It would help if we knew how old he is.
If he's pushing 50 Fugeddabout. chest hair & gold chains is the Italian mans wardrobe.

My dad, my uncles, family friends, all Italian & all dress like that. Some even do the full matching jump suit.
Socks with sandals.

It's a fashion nightmare.

I'm pushing 40 & Divorced I have zero sense of style & honestly couldn't match pants & shirts to save my life not too long ago.

But I do have the sense to recruit the pickiest women I know to be my personal shoppers.
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Old 5th December 2010, 11:24 AM   #7
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Yes, he is over 50. I figured as much. I will give it some time.
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