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should i wait around or stay away?


jessica1975

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my boyfriend for 1 1/2 yrs. is in a rut he works 2 jobs and his sport that hes involved in is very important to him. when his dad died he moved back home to make sure his mom that is in good health is taken care of. he would feel guilty if he moved on. he feels responsible to take care of things for her around the house.

hes very good to me. even w/ all the responsibilities he has. he still wanted to spend time with me. and now he not hardly around. he asks me why i get mad that he has things to do.

 

i just don't understand he has the same things that he did before. and he wanted to spend time w/ me. before he stopped the spending time w/ me. he was starting to let me in and let the wall he built up come down. he had been burnt so many times before it was hard for him to get into this relationship. i feel once he started having feelings he has made him self less available. and shut me out more and more. i really love him and want to just be patient and wait for him to get out of this rut. but it i am afraid he wont ever want more or may take forever. what is too long to wait for someone? he says he loves me and doesn't want me to go. but recently i broke it off because i feel like hes pushed me aways too many times.

 

i really want him to wake up and see that i am not the same as his last girlfriends. or see that he cant just make me wait by his side forever and not expect progress. i don't know if i should just let him go. and stay broken up. or just go back and just except that he may take a long time to get out of this. just deal w/ it i absolutely love him. hes a great guy. when we are together. if i except him and just wait for him because i love him. is it possible for him to finally be on the same track as i am and want change in his life? besides avoiding it.

 

need opinions, i would really like some males to respond since they understand their gender more than us woman try to. :(

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I think you should move on and date other guys.

 

i really want him to wake up and see that i am not the same as his last girlfriends.

 

You could be waiting a long time for this.

 

or see that he cant just make me wait by his side forever and not expect progress.

 

The way to show him this is by moving on and dating other guys.

 

You've made a lot of excuses for his behavior in your post. The fact of the matter is, he could meet another girl tomorrow who he falls head over heels for and marries in three weeks. I've found that waiting for someone to "come around" or "realize how great I am" is wasted effort. You've been with him for a year and a half--he knows you, yet now he's choosing not to spend time with you. If it were me, I'd end things and go find a guy who does want to open up and spend time with me. Life's too short to wait around for wishy washy people to make up their minds...

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